Florida-Central Florida

engagement party

What is the point of an engagement party if you have been engaged for a few months and everyone knows. I mean we aren't getting married for over a year still but what is the point? 

my FMIL wants to throw us a party in West Palm but this means taking off more work for me and already have to do that enough for wedding planning. 

Re: engagement party

  • Theresa626Theresa626 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Because it's fun!  I'm the type of person that loves pretty much any excuse to have a party.  I never ever understand people who say you shouldn't throw birthday parties after a certain age. Parties are fun.  Just do it.  You won't have another chance to have an engagement party again and it's so nice that you have someone willing to throw you one.  Plus, you might get extra gifts!
  • edited December 2011
    well I am not expecting or asking for gifts. we were already given unexpected gifts from most people that will probably be at the party.  I love parties but just thought that since everyone already knows, it has been months that it would just be kinda tacky.
  • edited December 2011
    I think a bit part of it is getting the families together to get to know each other before the wedding. We had one and it was great to have the families all meet since FI & I pretty much have 2 familieis each.
  • edited December 2011
    I agree with why not have one. You have someone that is being so generous to throw a party for you that it may even start things off bad if you decline her kind offer.
    An engagement party doesn't have to be immediately after the engagement and it is to celebrate your engagement. Just because everyone knows you are engaged doesn't mean they don't want to celebrate and share their excitement for you.
  • edited December 2011
    My engagement party was 4 months after we got engaged. We didnt get any gifts because we told people not to give them but it was a chance to get people together to celebrate.
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  • edited December 2011
    the thing is besides my parents I doubt any of my family will be there, and my parents might not  be able to go either because it would be a 3 hour drive each way for them.  It would be in West Palm beach and only his parents one of his aunt and uncles and  their friends are there. So really I would only get to celebrate with his family and their family friends.  

    I am not turning it down, I don't even think I could if I tried. I wouldn't because I love my FMIL and she is so excited to have me in the family I know, because she only has one son and no daughters.  


  • Theresa626Theresa626 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Then let her have her joy.  This is an exciting time for her as well.  It won't be that bad.  
  • edited December 2011
    At least she is excited about the engagement. My FMIL never said a word about the wedding, even when I brought it up, until recently when she saw the dress. I think its a nice gesture.
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  • edited December 2011
    if you cant and wouldnt turn it down, I am confused as to your question. It doesn't really matter the point since it sounds like it is happening anyways, right?
    Just go with it and have fun!
  • Britt1406Britt1406 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm with you on this one... I'm in a similar boat except that our wedding is less than 7 months away. Thankfully FMIL hasn't brought it up in a little while. Since your wedding is still so far away, I don't think it would be tacky.
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  • edited December 2011
    We just had ours halfway through our engagment. FI's parents made the treck from FL to Philly and made a vacation out of it. Even though we saw everyone back in April for my Mom's birthday, the party was a blast, and we got to celebrate with all of our friends in PA and family. I also got all my Maids together for the first time and got to see one of the Groomsmen who we never see.

    Not to sound greedy but we got $1200 from our party plus some nice gifts. In our eyes it was worth it and we had a lot of fun!
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  • edited December 2011

    I guess I feel this is more of a party for his family and his parents friends. I doubt my parents will even be there. I love his family and I wouldn't say no because it would be rude but just feel since about everyone who would be there celebrated our engagement up in DC for my fiance's graduation from law school and gave us gifts it just is like less exciting for the party then.  It is like oh yay everyone knows about this already wooo!  haha. I would love it if all my wedding party could be there but they won't. She hasn't mentioned in awhile probably because the FI is studying for the bar right now. Plus again I am just starting on my new career and having to spend money already to fly back and forth to plan this wedding besides other events in my family, it is just another expense for me to go down there, things are tight in the pocket book.

  • edited December 2011
    I understand, we had ours b/c my Mom and Aunt insisted!


    I would kindly tell her that you would love to, but that you are limited in time and resources and would prefer to save both for the wedding, honeymoon, shower, etc.
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