Kinda NWR: Taking time off school?

raehny

Ok, so about 3 weeks ago (although I swear it feels WAY longer) I intro'd myself, vented a bit, and got some stern but much needed feedback.  In those 3 weeks, I've had a lot fall in my lap and had a lot to think about.

Like I said before, I'm not really a school person (love to learn, don't love driving 1.5 hours round-trip and sitting on campus 15 hours/week while people talk at me).  I work 40 hours/week, and on top of that I'm easily distracted and trying to plan a wedding on top of all this.  I just finished finals today and have barely made it out of this semester alive...two of my four classes I'll have to retake next semester (supposed to be my last!) along with two upper-level major courses.  All of that being said, I'm toying with the idea of putting off my last semester for a year, so I would graduate May 2013 instead of May 2012.  I know it seems silly to put off such a close graduation, but I really think it might be for the best.  I live with my fiance, so I can't just cut my hours to focus on school since we have bills to pay (and he doesn't make enough to support both of us).  I also love my job, but the stress of school really affected my job performance this semester in a negative way, and I'd rather focus on getting back to where I should be at work since we have a new DM who only knows the school-stressed side of me and hasn't seen me at my best, so it would be tough to get my position back if I decided to leave for a few months since he's not my biggest fan, although I do have bosses (current and previous) who like me and I'm pretty sure would vouch for me.  So pretty much what I would like to happen is to put off school for a year, plan and execute my June 2012 wedding, focus on work, and then get motivated to finish my degree Spring 2013.

SO, my question is - has anyone taken time off school to sort out other life things?  Was it difficult to go back (both motivation and actually getting back into school)?  Did you have a hard time going back based on your GPA, or was that irrelevant?  I'm sending an email to my advisor tomorrow to see what she says about how hard it is to take time off at my school, but was just wondering if you ladies had any experience or advice as well, I know someone posted something similar-ish further down.  TIA. 

DramaGeek

My husband took time off, sort of.  He dropped his classes mid semester, the started back at the community college with a major change the next semester.  He has repeatedly said that if he hadn't promised my parents he would finish, he would have just quit all together.  Going back was really, really hard for him - and that was just after a few weeks, not a year.

FaithCaitlin

I went away to school for the first year and a half and hated it. I was depressed and miserable. 

I decided to move home over the summer and I wound up taking the Fall semester off just to get back to good mental place. Think of it as a really long mental health day. I went back to school in the spring and everything was fine.

Taking the semester off was the best thing I did. I regrouped myself, got my priorities straight, changed my major, etc. It was a life change for me. I wouldn't trade an earlier graduation date for that semester. Nothing hurt my GPA- I'm graduating next December with magna cum laude.

I think you have to know what's best for you. If you know that you'll never go back don't stop now! If you promise yourself that you will go back and truly know you will then I say go ahead and take the time off if you feel that you really need to.

callalily13

My fiance was forced to take a year off because he got really sick and was in the hospital and he has had the hardest time being back and trying to finish his BA. He hates school now because he is watching everyone else be done and be able to start their careers and he cant because he is trying to finish his degree. I would recommend either putting back the wedding a semester and taying in school (it's like 4-5 months til you are done) or just sucking it up to finish. Being this close to finishing, it is likely that you will not go back because there will always be something preventing you from finishing, its just right now wedding planning.

raehny

Thanks for the feedback, ladies!

My only fear about taking time off is that I might not want to go back in a year, even though I've pretty much promised myself that Spring 2013 would be the latest I would graduate.  I want my degree - I really do - since I want to start my own business and having a degree would definitely help.  Plus, my parents have paid for the half of my tuition that wasn't covered by my scholarship, so there's no way I could just quit.  Despite the fact that I've been sick of school for about the past year and a half, if I wasn't risking losing a job that I love (and could see myself staying with for the next 5 years) I would just suck it up and try to finish this next semester.  I just don't think I'm willing to take the chance of getting overly-stressed again and hurting my GPA and my job.  =/

FI also has just a few classes left in his degree (he had to take time off due to financial reasons) and we've talked about going back to finish our last semesters together so we can support each other (trying to do homework and study is hard when he gets all day to play video games!)

MMRoberts11

It sounds like you have everything figured out.  I'd say take the break but just be sure you stay on top of things and definitely keep your goal of going back.  Try to stay up on what you are studying but reading papers or anything that you can.

egeurts

My FI and I have both taken time off. 

For me, I was forced to take a semester off due to medical reasons. I was in the hospital for 2 weeks (conveniently, right after fall finals and got out Dec 29th), but my condition had affected my memory and had longer-lasting effects that had to be dealt with. There was no way I could go back right away and still deal with the stress of school. And man, I was PISSED. I am a major overachiever, I love school, and to be told that I couldn't go back and might not graduate on time made me super angry. Oh, and I lost my driver's license and had to move back in with my parents. That was a fun year. 

FI took that same semester off, both to help me and also for his own mental health. We had recently lost our apartment and most of our material possessions due to shitty landlord issues, so he also moved in with my parents. That, compiled with my hospital stay, was too much for him to handle in addition to school and he was working full time as well. He chose to take time off. My family supported him; his was convinced he'd never go back. 

9 months later, we got a new apartment, I went back to my school and picked up where I left off. My grades fell a bit from taking time off, but I managed to graduate on time thanks to extra credits I accumulated in high school. FI transferred schools, actually to a better school than he was in before, in order to live with me (we had been doing a LDR before), and his grades actually improved upon returning to school, but he graduated a year after his original date would have been. 

Now we're both in graduate school, back in a LDR (and hating it, again), getting married next summer.

Everyone's circumstances are different. If you swear to yourself that you'll finish, you know yourself best. You know whether you're the type to keep pushing it back or to follow through. I have a friend who went to a 2 year school and finished in 4, but he did it. As I said, my FI finished a 4 year degree in 5. I have lots of friends who plan on taking extra time to finish their graduate degrees because they work or have families. It's entirely up to personal circumstances. But you are the one who makes the final decision. 

Future Mrs Booth

I am taking the Spring 2012 semester off, as our wedding is in February.  I also work 40+ hours a week and attend school in the evenings.  Could you just cut down the amount of classes you take until the semester of the wedding? That way you won't be as far behind and you won't have as long of a gap?  I took the first year or so after high school off to work and save money to pay for school, and found it very difficult to go back.

Good luck!

misstomrstodr

Hey there - I see that you're getting married next semester. I normally tell people not to take off time at all (I'll explain why shortly), but I think you might have the right idea, for that reason alone. If it's your last semester in school, I think you're making the right choice because you're already doubting going back in the spring, and you'll have to put your all into it to finish up (as you will with your wedding!)
I took my last semester off of college in 2005. My mom got sick in the fall of 2005 so I put it off until Spring 2006. I really regretted it because I didn't get to finish with my friends (although I didn't live on campus so I didn't have much). It put me back in the terms of getting my life off of the ground (started my MPH program in Fall 2006, started my DPH program in Fall 2010 because I needed 3 years post-degree work experience).... why are you going to school? You mentioned wanting to start a business.... the sooner you work towards finishing school, the sooner you never have to go back! I am going for my doctoral degree right now, and I am working 2 jobs, planning my 6/30/12 wedding and going to school FT at night.... and I am working so hard so I never have to step foot in a classroom again. It's very tough (that's why I decided to get married in the summer where I didn't need to take a class).
I agree with others who mentioned taking 1 or 2 classes. So much can happen when you take time off. Keep your foot in the door of your school by taking a class or two...and this way, you won't be tempted to put it off further. Remember, life always happens, but once you have that degree in your hand, no one can take it away from you! Good luck

mrandmrsbrist

A little bit different, but I was at a large university, living away from home when my program was cut. I was told that I should "just pick a different program" so that I could stay at the university. I ended up withdrawing from the university and taking the summer + a few months off and starting an online program instead. I needed the time to figure out what I wanted to do, what would make me happy, and what would work with my schedule. Good luck to you!