Is this a weird idea?

azdancer8

I have seen arguments for both sides on whether or not to do a dollar dance at the reception, and I'm kind of torn on the idea myself. What do you all think about having a "Well Wishes" (or something like that) dance? It would have the same format as the dollar dance, with people changing out every 30 seconds or so, but the purpose would be so guests have a chance to dance with us and express their well wishes and whatnot. If they wanted to donate money, I wouldn't turn it down, but I certainly don't want to make that the reason for the dance.

alschmid

I'm kind of in the same boat.  I always kind of like the idea of a dance just dedicated to spend some time with the bride and groom.  I think its nice to offer something like that since some people may not just come up and ask.

Celles

There's no way to say this without sounding like a horrible snob, but dollar dances = low class to me.  My birth mom suggested that I have one (they're common in her circle), but I know my parents and future in-laws would be mortified by the idea.  I would be too if I hadn't become desensitized to it from spending time on The Knot!

I don't see why you have to have a dedicated dance to dance with your guests.  Why can't you just ... you know ... dance with them?

azdancer8

Mostly because I know people aren't likely to cut in unless invited to, and with 150+ guests, that would take seven and a half hours. (Assuming every guest wanted to dance and to just one three-minute song. *wink*)

But in all seriousness, I think it's sweet to be able to spend a moment dancing individually with some of my guests who may want to but might not otherwise ask.

janjan550

I am not doing the dollar dance, but I do see how it would be nice to have a few minutes (or seconds) with each guest.  Our wedding is smaller (75 people), so I think I am going to have that opportunity just throughout the night.  I think if it is normal in your family or circle of friends, it would be fine.  If it's not normal, some people may find it tacky because they might assume it is the dollar dance, whether you call it that or not.  At the end of the day, it's your wedding, so you should make it exactly the way you want.  I have this feeling that no matter what kind of wedding I have or what I do, someone can find a way to get butt hurt or think you made a poor decision, so you can't worry too much about what other people might think.  I don't think the dollar dance is THAT tacky because I have seen it done a few times, but I automatically knew it was not something I wanted to do.  I think it is just whatever your preference is.

acnahm

I had never ever heard of a dollar dance until TK and after I heard of it, it took me a good 6 months to figure out what the heck it was.  I was literally still unsure until I just read your post.  I think the idea behind it (I gather that the idea is to have a few seconds alone with the bride or groom during the wedding) is a good idea, but the doing it for money is the part where I can see why people think it is low class. I think maybe if you dress is up as something else (and make no mention of money and don't call it a "dollar" dance), maybe you can get away with it and people won't associate it with getting money.  I personally think you can do whatever you want (to a certain point, but I wouldn't be offended if I was a guest and this happened) since it's your wedding, but some guests might be put off. 

kimheartsscott

I agree with Celles.  If it's for money, it seems low class.  If it's for spending time with your guests, why don't you just spend time with them?  Nobody is going to have a fantastic bonding experience with you in 30 seconds.

Marissa0717

I don't think the dollar dance is tacky. In fact it has a very deep cultural connections and is really important in come cultures. By no mean is it "low class." It started as European immigrant tradition to ensure the newly weds had a little money to start off their new lives together, especially when times were uncertain such as the depression. Also, people are pinning literally a single dollar on the bride or groom to dance with them. It isn't like people charge $20 to dance with the bride/groom.
And even then, if you love the tradition but don't want the money just donate it to a favorite charity and let everyone know where it will be going to (its what we're doing).
I am of hispanic decent and it is a tradition, much like tossing the bouquet or having a first dance. I just think it is a little rude to call a cultural tradition low class.

Syndelin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_arizona-phoenix_this-weird-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:71Discussion:1049250e-4b43-4fa3-837b-503d027370efPost:e84ba6bd-bb5a-4e69-bac1-33c778499636">Is this a weird idea?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have seen arguments for both sides on whether or not to do a dollar dance at the reception, and I'm kind of torn on the idea myself. What do you all think about having a "Well Wishes" (or something like that) dance? It would have the same format as the dollar dance, with people changing out every 30 seconds or so, but the purpose would be so guests have a chance to dance with us and express their well wishes and whatnot. If they wanted to donate money, I wouldn't turn it down, but I certainly don't want to make that the reason for the dance.
Posted by azdancer8[/QUOTE]

I had that exact idea!  I was going to try to make up some little cards that people could write a well wish or advice on, and have the bridal party collect them just like they do with the money for the dollar dance. The DJ could explain it a bit, and it shouldn't be an issue.  I love the idea of being able to talk to some people that way that I may not be able to otherwise.  I know the whole night is going to go by too fast, and there will be too much going on!

I don't think there's anything wrong with a dollar dance really... but my FI wasn't exactly comfortable with the idea of it, so this was my idea of a compromise of sorts.  We're not young and in need of the cash really anyway, and I think it would be awesome to get to go through the wishes later, and maybe make a scrapbook out of them.  =)

chiwawa

I definitely think the dollar dance is tacky!  It's like you're being pimped out for a dollar.  My college roommate did one at her wedding, and I was mortified for her, especialy when nobody came up to pay a dollar to dance with her.  She ended up slow-dancing with her bridesmaids.
I think if you want to spend a little time with each of your guests, you should do a receiving line, or take the time to visit each table for a few minutes during dinner. 

Ingamckinley

We're having a dollar dance at our tacky Mexican wedding. In my hometown we're so tacky that some people don't even pay to dance with the bride and groom during the dance.

Beckity

Marissa- Thank you for posting what you posted.  I'm not of Hispanic descent, but there has been a dollar dance at every single wedding I have ever been to.  While others may have never encountered one, I was brought up thinking they were totally normal.  Perhaps that just means that I'm living in a monkey house, but to me they have always been tradition.  Most things that occur during a wedding are.  There are many wedding traditions that I don't hold value to, but far be it for me to label them as tacky and judge others for utilizing them in their own wedding.  It's all about what traditions hold meaning to you.

To respond to azdancer though, I really like Syndelin's idea of having note cards that guests could write on.  Then they could drop those into a bag or what-have-you, just like they would money.  It would be cute and fun to read them after the wedding is over.