Minnesota-Minneapolis and St. Paul

Photographer

Ladies, I was hoping someone (or someone(s)) could give me some much needed advice in the area of photographers at the wedding. I hate having my picture taken. By hate I mean I usually avoid it all costs, even to the extent of omitting myself from family photos, and special events. I cringe everytime I see a picture of myself, and it isn't uncommon for me to photoshop myself out of them if one is accidently snapped. My fiance is a Ham. He loves the camera. I don't want a photographer because of my insecurities, where my fiance is putting his foot down one will be in attendence. I don't know what to do! I understand that he wants to have paper memories, but the thought of having to endure countless pictures has me wanting to cry. Even worse than posed pictures are the ones snapped when I'm not looking, so I'm at a loss!
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Re: Photographer

  • edited December 2011

    First, if you  haven't already, you and your FI need to have a conversation about what you're expecting in regards to photos.  I'm assuming that he knows about your aversion to having your pictures taken.  How much is he willing to give and how much are you willing to give.  Meet each other half way.  Maybe during this conversation, you can compromise and agree to take x amount of pictures.  And once that limit has been reached, no more pictures.  Or you'll only spend 30 minutes on the pictures, and that's it.  He does have a right to have a few pictures of his wedding.  And you have a right to feel comfortable at your own wedding. 

    You'll have to compromise.  And it will be the first of many during your marriage. 

    After that discussion, then find a photographer that you both feel comfortable with.  And explain to them your aversion to having your picture taken and the compromised you've reached.       

  • edited December 2011
    I agree with Maya 100%.  I know what it's like to have insecurities like that.  Do you think you'll regret not having any pictures from your wedding?  Also, you don't have to have a photographer for a full day of coverage (getting ready shots, etc) if those make you uncomfortable.  But IMO I think you should have a photographer to capture the big moments, like during the vows, etc.  This is going to be the biggest day of your life, you should have a memory of it! 
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  • edited December 2011
    I agree with the PP. You definitely may regret it down the road if you don't have a photographer. Try to consider doing an engagement shoot. This may help you feel more comfortable with pictures on your wedding day and gives you a chance to get to know your photographer!
  • Bimbi284Bimbi284 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Aside from what PPs have said, I think this is the prime opportunity for you to really look deep down and work through these insecurities. Its clear that your FI wants to have this day captured forever. He obviously sees something in you that you don't see in yourself, so before even thinking about photographers, you need to do a little work on loving yourself lady! You'll be beautiful on your wedding day no matter what! There is nothing that can compare to what you feel on that day, and it really shows in pictures...especially candid ones. Some of my favorites from my wedding day are ones where I might look a bit awkward, but I can see how genuinely happy and excited I was on that day, and that, to me, is beautiful!
  • SSaltzman87SSaltzman87 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_photographer-9?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:708ccbd1-4deb-4bbf-a94d-70c3e33ddbcfPost:64f68824-7996-41df-b58f-a92d7691962d">Re: Photographer</a>:
    [QUOTE]Aside from what PPs have said, I think this is the prime opportunity for you to really look deep down and work through these insecurities. Its clear that your FI wants to have this day captured forever. He obviously sees something in you that you don't see in yourself, so before even thinking about photographers, <strong>you need to do a little work on loving yourself lady!</strong> You'll be beautiful on your wedding day no matter what! There is nothing that can compare to what you feel on that day, and it really shows in pictures...especially candid ones. Some of my favorites from my wedding day are ones where I might look a bit awkward, but I can see how genuinely happy and excited I was on that day, and that, to me, is beautiful!
    Posted by Bimbi284[/QUOTE]
    Egg-sactly.

    This is obviously a huge issue for you that's a lot deeper than just having a picture taken.
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  • luckybreezeluckybreeze member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thank you for the responses. I know that my aversion isn't normal, I just haven't figured out how to tweak that part of me. I understand why my fiance wants pictures, and don't begrudge him of that desire. I appreciate the responses in regards to this. I think that a large compromise is in order... On MY part. Hearing the consensus I need to suck it up has helped me realize that denying him his request would be utterly selfish on my part. Thank you again!
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  • SSaltzman87SSaltzman87 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_photographer-9?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:81Discussion:708ccbd1-4deb-4bbf-a94d-70c3e33ddbcfPost:71d3c8de-ac68-42c8-b472-a6ca2fcb4ab8">Re: Photographer</a>:
    [QUOTE] I think that a large compromise is in order... On MY part. Hearing the consensus I need to suck it up has helped me realize that denying him his request would be utterly selfish on my part. Thank you again!
    Posted by luckybreeze[/QUOTE]

    Good for you for realizing that :-D
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  • genevieve27genevieve27 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I just shot a wedding last weekend that in my meeting with the bride beforehand she was ADAMANT that she hated having her pic taken and would make my job very difficult for me(she gained some weight and was self conscious) she told me I'd be lucky if I got 10 shots of her. Fast forward to the big day and she was stunning! She knew it and turned into a model! Instead of the 10 I'd say I probably got about 400:) on the day you won't be worried about the photog...you'll be beautiful and so focused on marrying the love of your life nothing else will matter.
    I'm a professional photographer! www.peacockandprairie.com Wedding Countdown Ticker
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