Advice

mmattoon

For our wedding we did not invite children under the age of 18 with the exception of my sister and brother and our nieces and nephews and of course my FI's son, all but two of which are in the wedding. So I had to tell a few people no kids who asked if they could bring them even tho they weren't included on the invitations. Well a friend just emailed me asking if her 15 yr old daughter could come (8 days until the wedding). This woman's husband just passed away a few weeks ago from a brain stem injury related to a very tragic softball accident. Her daughter is having a very hard time dealing with it. But I had to explain to this woman why we cannot have her daughter at the wedding (she is already bringing another guest - since I gave her a "and guest" on her invite - if she wanted to bring her daughter as her guest, that I would be totally fine with). I feel terrible about it but I cannot have her daughter there when I left out many of my cousins and bridesmaids' children. It just wouldn't seem fair. WDYT? I just feel so BAD!

JVeaux

I think you did the right thing. I agree that's its not fair that she gets an invite when you had to leave so many others (that you also care about) off the invite list.  I think it is odd that she is already bringing another guest and also wants to bring the daughter (and with such short notice).  I do feel bad for the girl, but is your wedding supposed to help her grieve? probably not.

gottahavashorti

Since she was given the option of bringing the daughter as her guest despite it being an adult reception, I think it sounds like you were fair and accommodating.  It could be good opportunity for the daughter to spend the evening with some of her closest friends who can help her try to move towards what will be her new 'normal' if she's ready or give her a shoulder to cry on in her mom's absence.