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Can I invite people to just the ceremony and not the reception?

shae726shae726
First Comment
in Ohio-Columbus
Hi Ladies,

Our guest is at 230 and we really want to get it below 180. There are really some people that we would like to invite just to the ceremony and not the reception. Is this a rude gesture?
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Re: Can I invite people to just the ceremony and not the reception?

  • camarogirljcamarogirlj
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would be concerned with having everyone at the ceremony not leaving and going to the reception like typically happens.  It might be a bit awkward for one guest to say "see you at the reception" to another at the ceremony only to have that guest reply "I wasn't invited to it."  It seems that limiting the number to the overall event may be the best option.  If the cost of food is what is causing the issue then perhaps look into alternatives to serving a full dinner.  However, it is your wedding so ultimately it is up to you.  I'd just be very careful how I informed people that they aren't invited to the reception - you won't want everyone just assuming they are invited and showing up after the ceremony!  GL! 
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  • TheBeckmeisterTheBeckmeister
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think you should do that.  I think it's a little tacky to say "Well you can watch the actual wedding ceremony that may be kind of boring to you, but you can't come to the celebration later."  I think I would be offended...

    Are you trying to get the invite list to 180 or the actual number of people that will come to 180?  I know we're planning on inviting people that won't actually come, and we technically still have room for them but I've kind of already counted them out (that sounds kind of awful, sorry).  You could eliminate dates for people, or say no kids, or cut it off after a certain generation (first cousins only, no second cousins, or something like that).  I just don't think inviting some people to the ceremony and not the reception is a good idea...
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  • chaseglchasegl member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The short answer: Yes.  (I should add that my answer is in response to the question asking if it would be rude - yes it would be very rude)
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  • BrittBritt22BrittBritt22 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Extremely rude.
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  • mags218mags218 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No way. I think it is extremely rude as well. It would be different if you wanted to have a private ceremony and then invite everyone to the reception but not the other way around. If I were a person invited to the wedding and not the reception I might feel that I had only been invited for the gift. Besides, I don't know many people that get excited about going to a wedding other than the bride and groom, it is typically the reception that makes them fun. GL!
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  • maria009maria009 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I agree with BrittBritt22 and mags218, it comes across as being rude.

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  • shae726shae726
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    You know how you ask yourself a question and you know the answer? Well this was the one, I just needed confirmation.

    Thanks Ladies.

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  • yvonne614yvonne614
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    All people at the ceremony will be going to the reception because the reception is to be thought of like a continuation of the ceremony.  Thats what we are doing.  I think people may be hurt if you invite them just to watch you get married but they don't get to celebrate with you. 
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