FMIL Help

Allycat11

I would like to start off by saying my FMIL and I have always had a great relationship and the issue is actually that she is too accommodating. 
She has agreed to pay for the rehearsal dinner as well as our cake and a few other miscellaneous things.  I told FI to find out what her budgets were for those areas so we can look into vendors.  Tonight, he asked her what she was thinking and she said to just let her know what we wanted. I understand we have a quite a bit of time before booking our rd but I would like to begin cake tastings soon and have no idea what she thinks is reasonable or what she can afford. 

So what would you do?  Would you really just pick what you wanted? Or try to get her to give a budget?  I just don't know what to do and I really don't want to offend anyone. 

emarston1

I would get quotes from various bakers and RD locations.  Meet with a few and pick your favorites in a variety of price ranges.  Then give her the final say.

I wouldn't worry about offending anyone because it sounds like you've tried your best to be sensitive to her budget.  You've given her every opportunity to give you an amount and she hasn't.

rcj2rcd

Ditto Liz. Get a few quotes and show them to her. This way you will get an idea of what the budget is and make sure you are on the same page. I'm in the same boat as you. I love my FMIL and FIs family has been very generous in helping us out.

klreese0213

I agree. it sounds like she wants to make you happy. i'd really try to keep the budget lower and present her with idea. I would just be so appreciative for her to even offer to pay at all, so because of that i'd try to keep it lower. (but thats just me)

jlthomps0848

My FMIL is paying for our cake as well. She never told me a budget but she when cake tasting with me.  At each place I told them what I wanted and they gave us a quote.  Then she just told me to pick the one I wanted.  I made her a part of the process of choosing since she was paying for it. 

Allycat11

Great thanks for the input!  I think we will check out a few places and present the quotes to her and see if she has more of an opinion then.  Hopefully she can come cake tasting with us, but she lives in Grand Haven and it may be difficult for her to come out here soon.