New York-Hudson Valley

Re: Tackiness!

  • edited December 2011
    Dollar Dance!

    Many people already consider wedding invitations an invoice written in caligraphy. Why make your guests add to whatever it already cost them (flight, hotel, rental car, gift, etc) to dance with the Bride? Can't they just dance with her without paying for it?

    Ironically, the whole tradition started in Poland, the country I grew up in... not in my area though, I think it came somewhere from the north of Poland. In the south we just invite people to come and drink with us :)
  • edited December 2011
    I agree that the dollar dance is tacky, but I cut people slack when it comes to cultural traditions. I've been to a million Italian weddings that did this ... it's just part of the experience. Obviosuly, as my family became more Americanized, this has fallen out of favor (and I most deifnitely will not be doing one).  But I wouldn't judge if someone still chose to do it -- I understand the reasoning of wanting to carry on a tradition.

    The worst one for me was when the DJ made an annoucement that the "bar was now closed for dinner." WTF? If you're going to close the bar, at least give people warning so they can get a drink to enjoy with their meal.

    I enjoy my wine =)
  • wdubin122wdubin122 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Dollar dance and Jack & Jill.  I never heard of these until I started to go on wedding boards.  I think asking your guests for money is beyond tacky and rude.
  • edited December 2011
    What is Jack & Jill?
  • edited December 2011
    i went to a wedding last year where the photographer put a handful of business cards on each table at the reception... at first i thought maybe it had a code or something to view the pics from the wedding, but it didnt!! it was just his business card with contact info!! tacky & rude if you ask me!!
    Maggie & Lucas
    July 15, 2011
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  • edited December 2011
    Cash Bars, I hear this is a tradition some places of the country. Once had to pay for my SODA at a wedding - SODA! I don't drink soda anymore, so I'm going to need a vodka tonic next time
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_tackiness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:abb31b48-74e3-4c69-883d-7a217d50786ePost:323cba9e-d858-4d57-8ca1-630310bfdc0d">Re: Tackiness!</a>:
    [QUOTE]What is Jack & Jill?
    Posted by e_jakiela[/QUOTE]

    basically a fundraiser for a wedding. you invite guests and there's a entrance fee and they pay to play games and stuff like at a fair. all the money goes to pay for the wedding.



    i find cash bars incredibly tacky and rude. i already shelled out tons of money to go to your damn wedding and now i have to pay for a glass of wine too? wtf.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_tackiness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:abb31b48-74e3-4c69-883d-7a217d50786ePost:8be3b274-4b00-48de-bbb4-9330767a8fb0">Re: Tackiness!</a>:
    [QUOTE] basically a fundraiser for a wedding. you invite guests and there's a entrance fee and they pay to play games and stuff like at a fair. all the money goes to pay for the wedding. [/QUOTE]

     So it works like a cover at a club? People actually do that? that is even worse than a dollar dance.

    And I agree, cashbars suck! We went to a wedding where the bar was closing at 8:30 (pretty much after dinner) and cashbar was opening.... there was no warning. I normally drink less before eating because it makes my stomach hurt, so I had a glass of white wine only that wedding... I left my wallet at the hotel and most of the other guests we knew did not have tons of cash with them either to borrow... which would be super embarrassing as well.
  • Riss91Riss91 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    - Cash bars are the worst!
    - The dollar dance really doesn't bother me - honestly it's a friggin dollar and you're not required to fork it over - you can dance with the bride throughout the reception for free, so if you're not into it, just sit at your seat.
    - themes that are just over the top cheesy
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_tackiness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:113Discussion:abb31b48-74e3-4c69-883d-7a217d50786ePost:eae1439d-34f0-47d5-a6c6-45ee06ee5059">Re: Tackiness!</a>:
    [QUOTE]i went to a wedding last year where the photographer put a handful of business cards on each table at the reception... at first i thought maybe it had a code or something to view the pics from the wedding, but it didnt!! it was just his business card with contact info!! tacky & rude if you ask me!!
    Posted by maristredfox31[/QUOTE]

    Oh my, that is rude!

    I find dollar dances to be tacky unless they are the norm in your area/culture.

    I also despise cash bars. I understand that they are normal in some areas, but I would never invite guests to my home and charge them for drinks. We went to a wedding a few hours upstate last year and only a few types of beer and wine were free - while not as bad as a full cash bar, we weren't expecting it and had no cash.

    I also think it is tacky when either the bride or groom gets totally smashed and acts like a drunken fool. Gross.
    imageimageimage
  • jeanna85jeanna85 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    jack and jills mean different things to different circles of people. i've been to a few that were just couples showers. instead of the bridal shower, both the bride and groom were there, and women could actually take their spouses. theyre usually more informal, like cookouts. i guess its somewhat progressive considering its kind of old fashioned to give the cookware and all to the bride as if she's going to be the only one using it. im still going to have a traditional shower but jack and jills i dont have a problem with-except for those fundraiser types which i've never heard of  except on the knot.
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  • ssagessage member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am with everyone on the cash bars.

    Another one that is sort of similar was a wedding i went to last summer...is was beer and wine only (which for ME is fine as i drink beer) however, my friend, who was a fellow bridesmaid, likes amaretto and she had to PAY for her drinks!  sorry, but i thought it was rude to have her shell out all the money to be int he wedding and then charge her $6/drink...she had no cash on her...thankfully i brought a $20 just in case we got stuck somewhere.

    Oh yeah, and that leads me to, no transporation for the bridal party to the reception!
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  • wdubin122wdubin122 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I've also heard that they raffle off baskets at Jack and Jill's.  You not only have to pay to get in but your expected to buy a raffle ticket.  I'm with you on the cash bar too.  Don't serve alcohol at all if your guests will have to pay for it.
  • MythpenMythpen member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In general I agree that cash bars aren't kewl, and I don't intend to have one. HOWEVER its worth bearing in mind that someone might choose it as a way to try and slow down the drinking of certain party goers. I know I'll have a few guests that won't be leaving even close to sober (we plan to have a hotel near by for these folks so no driving obviously) but its one way to slow people up.
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