Wedding Etiquette Forum

And the drama continues... kinda long, sorry


A couple weeks ago I posted about one of our groomsmen who was pitching a fit because FI and I had to switchup some prewedding plans with him. After a little shuffling we were just able to push things back a bit and it all worked out. GM was able to move his comped hotel room to near the wedding site (he said they wouldn't do it, truth is he never asked, they did it happily.)

Last week this same GM called FI  and asked if we would be upset if he missed the rehearsal. FI told him if they couldn't make it it wasn't a huge deal we would just go over everything with him the morning of the wedding and then made a comment about how we will miss him and his family at the rehearsal dinner. GM then tells FI that they will be there for the dinner, just not for the actual rehearsal. He then goes on to explain he is taking his wife and kids to a local amusement park and they want more time to play.

Remember, this is a guy who was FURIOUS that FI had to shuffle a few things with him so we could have dinner with my dad who I have seen once in the last 37 years and meet my sister who I have never met. Really he just wanted a free meal, I think it is important to know that he actual initiated the dinner but was expecting FI and I to pay.

I think it is wrong to miss the the rehearsal but then show up for the free meal if you are in the wedding and don't miss it for a legitimate reason, and I don't see a couple extra hours at Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk as a legitimate reason.

Fast forward to last night, this same GM calls FI and asks to borrow MORE money. He is already into FI for over $300 (kids school clothes, which is the only reason FI agreed). He told FI he needed the money to go to the beach boardwalk that he promised his kids. FI tells him that we just can't loan him anymore money. FI came out and said that GM had maxed out his personal line of credit.

GM then says that he doesn't know how he can afford to make the trip for the wedding with out some cash from FI (it is a four hour drive). So FI tells him that if he really can't afford it then maybe he shouldn't take the trip. GM then tells FI that he won't be coming and he is glad FI understands because he already went in and cancelled the tux  rental. He told FI that he couldn't get the deposit back because it was charged to FI's and mine wedding acct. card. He was actually trying  to scam this $20 too! I'm not sure if we can get the $ applied to FI's tux or not, the wedding is in 1 week and all changes were supposed to be made 2 weeks prior, but it isn't really a big deal.

I know this guy isn't a good friend, FI never has anything good to say about him and quite honestly I am hoping this friendship will fizzle out. Problem is this guy just doesn't reallly get how he comes across. He is seriously the most self absorbed person I have ever met. He makes racial comments all the time, I believe he has a gambling problem. FI never calls this guy but he calls almost daily and sometimes multiple times a day. If FI doesn't answer the phone he will call repeatedly and start texting. If that doesn't work he will start posting on my facebook wall.

Anyway, not really any questions, just kinda venting. Only I'm not upset, flabbergasted, but it is really a relief. I'm not sure how this will all play out in the future so I'm not sharing this with others, so I'm sharing it here so that I can feel like I got it all out!

If you made it this far thanks for reading.

Edit.. corrected detail about tux
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