Rehearsal dinner invites - do groom's parents send them?

lcosette

My parents are paying for our wedding, and so want to send out invites that read 'mr. and mrs. ... invite you to the wedding of their daughter... to ...., son of ......', or something like that.  That is the normal way, correct?

The issue comes in the fact that we are inviting everyone to the rehearsal dinner, as we are having a destination wedding.  The groom's parents will be hosting this.  Do they send out their own invitations to the rehearsal dinner?  My parents and I were trying to come up with a way to include them in the wedding invites, but couldn't figure out a good wording.  I'm wondering if my in-law's feelings will be hurt by this - they aren't doing the inviting for the wedding and have to send out separate invites.  Anyone know the proper way to do this?

betrothed123

Yes, that invitation wording is fine.

If you ILs are hosting the RD, they should issue the invites.  I think your parents are kind of overstepping their bounds on this one, unless the ILs have asked them to include the RD invite in the wedding invite.

TheSaltyPeanut

I did our RH dinner invites even though MIL hosted it.  H's dad passed away a few years ago and his mama has arthritis pretty bad so she was thrilled that would even think of to take care of that.  I did put on the invite "hosted by..." on the bottom.  PIB if you need an example

ac_in_dc

DH and I took care of the RD invites even though his parents paid for it and were co-hosting. Although we didn't do printed invites...we just contacted folks individually with the logistical details and asked them if they'd like to attend.

With you guys it sounds like a printed invite may work better. I'd ask FI's folks if they want to do this or if they'd prefer you take care of it.

On the wedding invite, I think the way you've included FI's parents is nice. And I think it's the most common way to do it when the brides parents' are hosting.

jed15

That is exactly the wording we used on our wedding invites- FI's parents have not said one word about the wedding or RD or offered to pay for anything, I was thinking about putting:
Mr Mrs Amazing request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter (ME!)
to Stunningly handsome man,
son of rich cheapos,
with real names of course!
FI said he didn't want his parents name on the invite, so i didn't push it.
My parents already planned to have a classy RD catered at their house, if FI's parents would like to pitch in and pay, I'll put them on the RD invite, if not I'll just say hosted by my parents, since they have made no move to do anything for the wedding.

lcosette

Okay, I will leave the wording for the invites the same.  Truth be told, my fiance's parents are really only chipping in for the rehearsal dinner - we are paying for most of it ourselves.  But, I thought just to be nice and since they are paying something (I guess) for it, I would put their names on the invite.  I think my parents are sort of unhappy at the fact that they are paying for the entire wedding, so their names MIGHT not make the invitation...we'll see.  But I'll ask my MIL if she wants to do the invitations herself, or would like me to help out with them.  Thanks for the advice!

carrieoz_76

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rehearsal-dinner-invites-grooms-parents-send?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:762d1d5e-daf7-4967-b5af-f976fc5c3be7Post:3650ee02-0815-48df-81b4-20c57edc02f2">Re: Rehearsal dinner invites - do groom's parents send them?</a>:
[QUOTE]That is exactly the wording we used on our wedding invites- FI's parents have not said one word about the wedding or RD or offered to pay for anything, I was thinking about putting: Mr Mrs Amazing request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter (ME!) to Stunningly handsome man, son of rich cheapos, with real names of course! FI said he didn't want his parents name on the invite, so i didn't push it. My parents already planned to have a classy RD catered at their house, if FI's parents would like to pitch in and pay, I'll put them on the RD invite, if not I'll just say hosted by my parents, since they have made no move to do anything for the wedding.
Posted by jed15@case.edu[/QUOTE]
You are aware that nowadays no one is <em>required</em> to pay for anything, that if they don't offer it isn't necessarily a comment on your relationship or their "cheapness" and whatever they may offer to pay is a gift that should be graciously accepted, yes?  Because I'm not getting that from this post at all...

CCBelle

Yes, it's really not important who is paying for the RD, it's who you consider the hosts to be.  If it's going to be FI's parents, than they should send the invitations (if they are able to, of course).