Inviting only kids over 5??

Backpackers

I understand that you can't pick and choose which kids you invite based on things like how bratty they are, and how close to the family they are. But what about age? FI wants to cut it off at 5, but I kind of feel like this goes along with the picking and choosing thing.

Also, if you think it is acceptable, how would we do this? I don't think we're having inner envelopes which is the only way I could think of easily doing it if this is what we go with.

TIA!!!

Kati0105

FI wants to cut it off at 5, but I kind of feel like this goes along with the picking and choosing thing.

Agreed.  What if a family has one child over 5 and one child below 5? 

nda_roxybabe

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-only-kids-over-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a149678f-3fa8-4e07-b44f-6591a41bf1c2Post:4397d0d6-0bcd-4709-8b4a-1c5b8d949137">Inviting only kids over 5??</a>:
[QUOTE]I understand that you can't pick and choose which kids you invite based on things like how bratty they are, and how close to the family they are. But what about age? FI wants to cut it off at 5, but I kind of feel like this goes along with the picking and choosing thing. Also, if you think it is acceptable, how would we do this? I don't think we're having inner envelopes which is the only way I could think of easily doing it if this is what we go with. TIA!!!
Posted by Backpackers[/QUOTE]

5 is fine.
I'm not sure about the lack of inner envelope. Maybe just address it as needed on the outer envelope.

katiewhompus

I think 5 is a strange cut off number. I could see 18, 21 etc. But I can't think of how to explain 5 as a cut off number.
What if a family has a 5 year old and a 6 year old?

Backpackers

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-only-kids-over-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a149678f-3fa8-4e07-b44f-6591a41bf1c2Post:334a9b9c-3c43-4e2e-b901-413d48ce1071">Re: Inviting only kids over 5??</a>:
[QUOTE]  What if a family has one child over 5 and one child below 5? 
Posted by Kati0105[/QUOTE]

This is part of my problem, although there is only one family like this and I think they are planning on leaving the kids at home no matter what... But it still feels kind of funny...

nda_roxybabe

Yea, I would not split siblings.
I think 5 and older is ok though...

FutureMrsTR

I think that 5 is a weird age to use as a cut-off.  I could even see 6 easier because most kids are in first grade at age 6 and you could at least rationalize that they have more self-control practice in school.  And the splitting siblings could be an issue, but really that could be an issue with any age cut-off.

HisCB

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-only-kids-over-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a149678f-3fa8-4e07-b44f-6591a41bf1c2Post:f18ad34d-cfe7-4d03-a04f-76d9e8ab3b17">Re: Inviting only kids over 5??</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>If you're worried about a huge guest list, I would go the circle route:  cut off at a certain circle, but invite all of that circle regardless of age.  So, only kids in the wedding party, or only kids in the immediate family, or only kids in the family, etc.</strong> If you're doing it because you're worried that you may have a bunch of terrors running around, then that's equivalent to picking and choosing which kids can come, and will cause you problems.
Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

thats what i am doing. inviting the kids i actually know (in inner circles) and not the kids of my  moms cousins who i dont know. but i am NOT going to be a stickler on if they rsvp with their kids, im ok with that. our venue/food has plenty of flexibility so an extra couple kiddos wont hurt.

Backpackers

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-only-kids-over-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a149678f-3fa8-4e07-b44f-6591a41bf1c2Post:f18ad34d-cfe7-4d03-a04f-76d9e8ab3b17">Re: Inviting only kids over 5??</a>:
[QUOTE]If you're worried about a huge guest list, I would go the circle route:  cut off at a certain circle, but invite all of that circle regardless of age.  So, only kids in the wedding party, or only kids in the immediate family, or only kids in the family, etc.
Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

This is why we'd do it - the guest list (at least in my mind, but I think he might it otherwise...). The only kids are all in the same circle - kids of cousins. I don't want to not invite ANY kids. Then half of FI side wouldn't show up and would probably be offended. They aren't exactly the most understanding of people.

quotequeen

As far as how to do it, it's the same as any other way you would indicate who is invited.  I'm not planning on having inner envelopes, so I'm just going to write the names of everybody who is invited on the outer envelope.  I would suggest putting X seats have been reserved in your honor or something like that on your RSVP card, but it looks like you have already ordered them.

Backpackers

No, we haven't ordered them yet, that's just a stock photo but it's coming time for ordering so we have to start figuring this out.

Backpackers

I might be just worrying too much because I typically try to make as many people happy as possible. It didn't help with bridesmaid dresses and I don't think it's helping with this!