Bridal Shower- Step family

ashaffier

My MOH and BM are throwing a bridal shower for me and inviting my side of the guest list. My future mother-in-law and sister-in-law are planning on throwing a shower and inviting their side of the family. However, my FI's parents are divorced. He thinks I should ask his mom and sister to invite his step-mom and step-sisters to the shower for his side of the family but I don't feel comfortable doing that. They don't hate each other but they don't really talk.
 I thought my MOH could invite them to the shower for my side of the guest list since it would only be 4 additional people but FI says they would hardly know anyone and would not feel comfortable. I'm not really sure that they would be comfortable at the shower his mom and sister are throwing and I'm not sure his mom and sister would be comfortable inviting them.
Any thoughts on what I should do?

skippylouwho

All the moms (real and step) should be invited to all showers.  His sisters/step-sisters should probably also invited to all of them. 

SaraAndrew2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bridal-shower-step-family?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cc400354-3bd1-4388-9b7c-7d036e88a023Post:590a41df-97a6-4567-b92b-bb27c6cf96a8">Re: Bridal Shower- Step family</a>:
[QUOTE]Whom to invite is really at the host's discretion.  This appears to be an issue with FI's side of the family.  Have him deal with his mom and sister and decide what they would like to do.
Posted by katelynbrian[/QUOTE]

Generally the shower hosts tell the bride how many guests they can accomodate and ask her for a guest list.  Now obviously the shower hosts shouldn't be asked/expected to invite people they don't like, but it's not like the shower hostess usually draws up the guest list all by herself.

I think it is perfectly fine to mention to your FMIL that you and FI thought it would be nice to include his step-mom.  If she doesn't like the idea of inviting them, let it and don't insist.  In which case I think it is fine to invite them to the shower on your side (as long as your MOH can accomodate them).

Heather8505

My mom is hosting a shower for me and I asked her if she minded if my stepmom and aunts on that side came.  They are civil to each other but not exactly friends.  My mom said that was fine as it would only be a few extra people...otherwise my stepmom was going to throw a shower as well.  My mom understands it would be easier for me to do one shower and it is still hers to host