Cash Bar/wedding invitations

nda_roxybabe

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:12d0cf32-ded0-4895-a746-77bbf1358bb5">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]Who has the "BOOK OF EDIQUETTE RULES"???  If there was one, this board wouldn't be here.  Obviously there are boards here to discuss it because what one person's idea of "proper ediquitte" may not be the same as anothers.  As another poster mentioned, how many of your parents are footing the whole bill for your weddings?  Because that's proper ediquette.
Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

No one, because "ediquette" is not a real word. I do however know several people who own etiquette books.

tlv204

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:12d0cf32-ded0-4895-a746-77bbf1358bb5">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]Who has the "BOOK OF EDIQUETTE RULES"???  If there was one, this board wouldn't be here.  Obviously there are boards here to discuss it because what one person's idea of "proper <strong>ediquitte</strong>" may not be the same as anothers.  As another poster mentioned, how many of your parents are footing the whole bill for your weddings?  Because that's proper <strong>ediquette</strong>.
Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

Are you kidding? It's written for you at the top of the page.

Anyway, believe it or not since you clearly haven't read any of them, there ARE books on etiquette and a very standard set of rules. Brides parents paying for the wedding is not mentioned in any of the books I have read, so quit making shiit up.  That is NOT etiquette and has nothing to do with being polite, it's just tradition. There's a big difference that you don't seem to get.

eastunder1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:12d0cf32-ded0-4895-a746-77bbf1358bb5">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Who has the "BOOK OF EDIQUETTE RULES"???  If there was one, this board wouldn't be here. </strong> Obviously there are boards here to discuss it because what one person's idea of "proper ediquitte" may not be the same as anothers.  As another poster mentioned, how many of your parents are footing the whole bill for your weddings?  Because that's proper ediquette.
Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

You know, they should really make books with set, outlines rules of proper etiquette.  Its a shame we don't have that.  Someone should get on that.  Oh, wait.

MeaghanandMichael

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:12d0cf32-ded0-4895-a746-77bbf1358bb5">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]Who has the "BOOK OF EDIQUETTE RULES"???  If there was one, this board wouldn't be here.  Obviously there are boards here to discuss it because what one person's idea of "proper ediquitte" may not be the same as anothers.  As another poster mentioned, how many of your parents are footing the whole bill for your weddings?  Because that's proper ediquette.
Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

Emily Post. Check out the Emily Post Institute for the most up to date information.
Miss Manners.
even Martha can be helpful...

The fact that you can not spell etiquette correctly when it is the actual title of this board is just amusing.

The Mel and Todd Show

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:12d0cf32-ded0-4895-a746-77bbf1358bb5">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]Who has the "BOOK OF EDIQUETTE RULES"???  If there was one, this board wouldn't be here.  Obviously there are boards here to discuss it because what one person's idea of "proper ediquitte" may not be the same as anothers.  <strong>As another poster mentioned, how many of your parents are footing the whole bill for your weddings?  Because that's proper ediquette.
</strong>Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

Etiquette.  You can't find the book because you're looking in the wrong section.  Try again under "eti" instead of "edi".  You'll find it. 

Also, that's tradition.  Etiquette and tradition are different, but I can see the confusion, since tradition does include a "d".  I'm sure this straightens it all out for you. 

andyandhillary

Kate Spade also as an etiquette book.  This board exists as a form of community and help with quick answers.  It's also here for general questions or ones with sticky situations.  Perhaps you should purchase an etiquette book. 

andy71781

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:2b0e1e58-163d-4538-bb2d-be6483bb3d00">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations : Etiquette. Thanks for playing though.
Posted by btrflykate1230[/QUOTE]

Can we enforce a spelling test to post on the Etiquette board?

jnic0319

I once went to a wedding where they passed a hat to collect money for a beer run half-way through the reception.  Maybe Kari and this person should be friends.

[Deleted User]

Oh wow, now I am getting shunned for misspelling a word.  I must be the only person to ever do so.  I was typing fast and didn't care to use spell check.  Sue me for misspelling and sue me for coming from a practical place where free alchohol is not expected.

I'd much rather GO to a wedding and pay $20 for alcohol for myself, than have the B&G pay that for everyone, OR than have the B&G not have invited me since they could only afford free booze for a select number of people.

Apparantly most of you would rather miss out on someone's big day, if they can't afford to get all their guests drunk.  How petty.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:0d6b5220-ad41-4805-9dfe-a5f7575ce867">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]BTW I don't always think hors d'oeuvres are bad at a reception, it's just the mentality of "Oh I want to celebrate with everyone so I'm not worried about being a good hostess!" that kills me. Some events with finger foods have more and better food than those that don't, but I suspect that was not the case here. I didn't assume your dress was expensive, I was speaking generally. I know a few people who have spent closer to a thousand dollars on a dress, and then had a cash bar.
Posted by tlv204[/QUOTE]

Exactly. There's a way to do a non-meal reception. Invite people to a 2pm wedding with cake and punch to follow, and be done by 5ish. Have an 8pm wedding, followed by a few finger foods or a dessert buffet. But don't invite people to a 5pm wedding, give them carrot sticks, cheese and crackers, and say, "Well, I guess you can hit up McDonald's on your own dime after this."

[Deleted User]

The OP was asking if she should put it on her invitation, not if she should have a cash bar or not... and everyone started telling her that she shouldn't have a cash bar which wasn't what she asked.  I only spoke up to let her know that not everyone expects that..

eastunder1

Oh Kari.  Just stop.  I understand you're embarrassed and feel like you're getting backed into a corner here and you want to argue your way out of it.  I really do.  We've all been there.  But seriously.  Just let it go.  You're embarrassing yourself.  You can personally shun etiquette all you want, but don't come on an ETIQUETTE board and try to tell everyone why it doesn't matter.  

btrflykate1230

So, Kari, is this you? Did you fake the last sentence to throw us off?

http://theknotpostsecret.tumblr.com/post/573416797

MeaghanandMichael

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:1fcd40cc-7133-42a9-a93e-292f0ae283e2">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh wow, now I am getting shunned for misspelling a word.  I must be the only person to ever do so.  I was typing fast and didn't care to use spell check.  Sue me for misspelling and sue me for coming from a practical place where free alchohol is not expected. I'd much rather GO to a wedding and pay $20 for alcohol for myself, than have the B&G pay that for everyone, OR than have the B&G not have invited me since they could only afford free booze for a select number of people. Apparantly most of you would rather miss out on someone's big day, if they can't afford to get all their guests drunk.  How petty.
Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

Again, let us work on our reading comprehension shall we, Kari? No one here is talking about you as a guest. No one is about to throw a tantrum over $3 beers.

We are talking to you as the hostess of your event for which you should be accepting responsibility, not making excuses.

nda_roxybabe

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:1fcd40cc-7133-42a9-a93e-292f0ae283e2">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh wow, now I am getting shunned for misspelling a word.  I must be the only person to ever do so.  I was typing fast and didn't care to use spell check.  Sue me for misspelling and sue me for coming from a practical place where free alchohol is not expected. I'd much rather GO to a wedding and pay $20 for alcohol for myself, than have the B&G pay that for everyone, OR than have the B&G not have invited me since they could only afford free booze for a select number of people. Apparantly most of you would rather miss out on someone's big day, if they can't afford to get all their guests drunk.  How petty.
Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

You didn't just misspell it because you were typing fast, if that were the case you would have only done it once, not multiple times.
Also, since when does drinking= drunk?

ootmother2

hey!

I happen to know for a fact that Meaghan, roxy, Eastie & TLV are super lushes.  Don't listen to them.  Listen to me.



CASH BARS ARE RUDE!

ywia

tlv204

I mean I am a lush, but that's not the point! Hush oot

nda_roxybabe

Yes, it's true, I'm a huge lush. I go to weddings JUST for the free booze. I could care less about the B&G

MeaghanandMichael

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:cd169589-53ce-4538-a0c6-4770bda6c174">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]hey! I happen to know for a fact that Meaghan, roxy, Eastie & TLV are super lushes.  Don't listen to them.  Listen to me. CASH BARS ARE RUDE! ywia
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

Actually, if I had my way I would change eddicut to say that weddings should only serve liquor and no food. Who really needs the extra pesky food calories? Yes, yes I would change that.

ootmother2

but I NEED food calories!

but I need wine more

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:e3f85de8-2963-4645-b6a3-3eb947e9e7fb">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations : You didn't just misspell it because you were typing fast, if that were the case you would have only done it once, not multiple times. Also, since when does drinking= drunk?
Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]

I said I was typing fast and<strong> didn't take the time to use spellcheck</strong>.  I am pretty sure everyone has misspelled a word in their day or not cared to take the time to use spell check.  I can't believe you ladies are throwing tantrums over reading a misspelled word.  How will you ever get on with your day???

ootmother2

how old are you kari?

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:65ea4466-9de4-4583-9cd3-7c21c14b7a1b">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh Kari.  Just stop.  I understand you're embarrassed and feel like you're getting backed into a corner here and you want to argue your way out of it.  I really do.  We've all been there.  But seriously.  Just let it go.  You're embarrassing yourself.  You can personally shun etiquette all you want, but don't come on an ETIQUETTE board and try to tell everyone why it doesn't matter.  
Posted by eastunder1[/QUOTE]

I'm not embarrassed.  I just have different values and different priorities than you.

nda_roxybabe

I'm not throwing a tantrum, I'm sitting here quite calmly in fact.

The Mel and Todd Show

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:cf65b01b-e038-456f-84ed-3c1f341a0305">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations : I said I was typing fast and didn't take the time to use spellcheck .  I am pretty sure everyone has misspelled a word in their day or not cared to take the time to use spell check.  I can't believe you ladies are throwing tantrums over reading a misspelled word.  How will you ever get on with your day???
Posted by kari_lynn222[/QUOTE]

You are beginning to come off as rather shrill.  It is less than becoming. 

MeaghanandMichael

Can The Mel Show run every day? It is truly spot on.

mandybear7

kari- Please realize that you are probably "sticking up for" an AE. I highly doubt terrapy is a real, since she has not been back at all. Just let it go.

tlv204

I am most definitely going to use the phrase "less than becoming" a lot more. I AM reading Pride and Prejudice at the moment, so I'm sure I can work it into lots of conversations!

JennaV26

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cash-barwedding-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dc2eff87-6f6f-4cf1-9859-8c02f87a5d23Post:e3186f50-1476-49bf-a2d5-a0f9cdf2cfe2">Re: Cash Bar/wedding invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]I actually much prefer draught beer to bottles or cans, so there's that too. What if the reception is at a restaurant with beer on tap? Is that too frat-party-esque?
Posted by tlv204[/QUOTE]

Hmm that's a good point, I see what you're saying. I guess when I hear that a wedding has two kegs and when they're floated people have to pay for the rest of their drinks I just don't see a classy restaurant reception.

I concede though, you're right!

hd7694

I have to jump in and say that I am only reading one persons temper tantrum.  i won't say any names, Kari, but sister you need to step back and take a deep breath.  I feel the fight or flight reaction coming on.  This is an etiquette board not and opinions board.  The PP's are just stating proper etiquette.  If you want opinions ask you family and friends.