Wedding Etiquette Forum

XP: 2 questions on addressing invitations

1. If the outer envelope says "Mr. and Mrs. James Jones," does the inner envelope have to say "Mr. and Mrs. Jones"? I feel a little weird not including the woman's first name anywhere, as though she may think I don't know it (for FMIL's friends, etc.). Can I use "Mrs. Joanne Jones and Mr. James Jones" on the inner envelope, or stick to tradition?

2. On my STDs, I addressed a few people (3 I think) as "Dr." when they have a PhD but no MD. I later learned that PhDs don't get addressed as "Dr." on social correspondence. Should I change it to "Mr."/"Mrs." on the invitations now, or keep my error consistent and address them as "Dr."?

[Edited for grammar.]
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Re: XP: 2 questions on addressing invitations

  • They are INVITATIONS.  Invite is a VERB.

    You can be more informal on the inner envelopes if you want and just put James and Joanne.

    I'd change it to Mr/Mrs.  I doubt they'll remember how you did the STD when they get the invitation.
  • If you want to be correct then you address the invitations as
    outer: Mr. and Mrs. John Smith
    inner: Mr. and Mrs. Smith

    If you want the woman's name on there then there are ways to do it but the inner envelope is not a place to get informal.

    Regarding the 2nd point, could you find out what they prefer?  We had a PhD who prefers Dr. so that's how we addressed him.
  • I was always told to address the inner envelope with the familiar, so outer would be Mr and Mrs James Smith and inner is Uncle Jim and Aunt Sally.  I don't know the etiquette on that though.

    As far as #2, ditto banana. Some PhDs prefer to be addressed as Dr, so that's what we used.
  • Question 2:  Yeah, use the Dr.   I've had my Ph.D. for 16 years and frankly, I don't know any Ph.D. who does NOT use the Dr. for formal invitations like wedding invitations.
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