katherineUTC

luciamatt

I read your post about your low attendance and we are in the same boat. We invited about 136 and we only have about 70-80 coming. We still have some that have not even called or send their rsvp in. For awhile we were stuck at 45 and we thought "good lord" that really sucks. Our deadline for the rsvp was two weeks ago and we are still getting responses...but they are very slow in coming in. We are def. disappointed in the low attendance...especially since most are FI's relatives and really close college friends. They are all complaining about not having the money to make the long drive or to get flights. I comp. understand some of the people...but most have really great jobs, and make it a point to travel across the world for vacations. We made the effort to go to every single one of their weddings as well..... and it was during really hard times for us. Neither of us had a job...well actually I had a job but was still in college at the time so it was part time. But we def. made the effort to go. So yeah, I see your point. BUT FI and I decided to not really stress over the ones that aren't their and just be extremely happy for the ones that are making it a point to come. We now know who are "close" to us and who really isn't.

katherineUTC

Yeah, I know what you mean!!! I have people coming who I am not really close to anymore, who live 7 hours away, and then I have people who are not coming who I thought for sure would come... I have one friend in NJ, (she and her husband have really good jobs, I might add), we flew up there last year to attend her wedding... originally I had told her it would probably be very hard to go, expensive, etc but she said to me "it would mean SO much to me if you were here for it." so I felt bad yet honored that she felt that way and went. Airfare, hotel (my parents live in the area but their house is a MESS so there is really no room for us there), time off of work, wedding present... we probably spent $1000 to go. Yet, she and her husband are not coming down for ours. I have another friend who, I attended her bridal shower, wedding, and baby shower, even though she lives 5 hours away, and I gave her extremely nice gifts for all those things, and I havent even gotten an RSVP back from her (or any sort of gift, which sounds HORRIBLY selfish and materialistic but I cant help but feel that way, I spent a lot of money on her shower gifts). Anyway enough complaining... Yep, im trying to just focus on the people who WILL be there and look forward to the yummy things I can add to the menu if we dont meet our minimum

swimher14

::butting in:: I think what sucks the most about people not coming is that for us, we've only had 2 couples express that they were sorry, write a note, say they wish they could be there, etc. Everyone else has pretty much just said no and that was it. Our deadline was Sep 10 because I knew people wouldn't RSVP and we still have 2 people we haven't heard from! We told them that if they couldn't give us an answer by last night they were going down as a no and that was that. We were both really bummed by some people not coming(like, um, FI's half brother and GM whose wife is a reader and son is the ring bearer and they have decided that they are leaving as soon after the ceremony as possible and don't care if it's upsetting us), but we are trying to think about the people who are coming that do care.P.S. Lucia- I emailed Tara with our headcount this morning so I am really curious to see what the new invoice looks like when she gets back to me!

katherineUTC

Megan you are much nicer than me, lol, I am the RSVP nazi, as soon as Oct 2 hits (the day after the deadline), im sending out an email to everyone on my side who has not responded and saying that if I dont hear back from them in the next day or so, that we are going to have to assume they are not coming. I have given these people FIVE WEEKS to respond.. augh!!! And yeah, the RSVP's with NO little note or anything, they suck.

katherineUTC

PS - I meant the "no" rsvp's that dont have a note

swimher14

Well I was a nazi on my side, but FI is too nice, and FMIL kept trying to add people, like she tried to add two more people yesterday!! I was only semi-nice to FI about it because I did make the deadline 2 weeks early to account for the fact that a lot of his friends wouldn't do it. Seriously though, he would call someone and ask if they were coming and they would just say 'of course' with no explanation as to why they never mailed their card in! I got made fun of a lot because I kept saying I didn't make those invitations, stamp the envelopes, and address them to myself for the fun of it!

katherineUTC

I hear ya! Im being picked on by ppl for trying to round up the RSVP's before the deadline. I've had SEVERAL people whine "but you SAID october 1...."  BUT IF YOU KNOW YOU ARE COMING OR NOT COMING, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL OCT 1?!?! Accck!!! lol

luciamatt

yeah...all of FI's aunts and uncles are not coming. I feel so bad for him. He is being a great sport about it, but I can tell that he is a little upset. His mom actually called me the other day literally in tears because she was so upset that he brother and sister-n-laws would not be coming. They had originally said that they would all ride together to save money and just to make it a mini vacation. I just had to tell her that there is really nothing that we can do about it now. And that it is going to be a beautiful wedding. Megan, let me know what Tara says. I have yet to give her my final head count.....since we are still waiting on a handful of people. But I gave her about where we thought we would be. I am getting frustrated with RI....we have a ton of people tell us they booked their rooms and when I called the other day to get the names of who, so I can start on the OOT guest bags, they told me they don't have a single name. Apperantly Sharee put them under her name instead of our names (?????). So they told me to come by a week before the wedding and they will print out a list of ALL the guest that are staying there that weekend and I will have to go through and highlight each of our guest. I don't have time to do that.

swimher14

Wait, you can't call and find out how many rooms are under your block? Sheree definitely said you could and I need that info for the OOT bags. I can't even come by the week before the wedding!

katherineUTC

Seriously??? I have a room block there too, I was going to call and see how many ppl had booked rooms there, wth? That's ridiculous!

swimher14

So I just emailed Sheree and asked her to send me the number of rooms blocked at each hotel. She asked for a fax number and said she'd fax over a list. Maybe someone at the hotel was wrong when they talked to you Lucia?

luciamatt

yeah... you can def. call in and get your number of people that have booked...the problem was, the people that called in (FI's immediate family) were put under Sheree's name and not under ours. FI called her and she fixed the ones that were put under her name and put them under ours...but I think that reason that she did that was because she gave our immediate family a huge discount because we had such a hard time blocking there from the very beginning because of the race that weekend. But I also had this problem with Courtyard because some guest have booked there and they gave them a discount for being a senior citizens....so again those people were put under the customer service rep's name instead of ours. It just makes it hard when they do that for me to find out who has booked and who has not. I am glad our guests are getting extra discounts, but they need to make it a lot easier on us on getting a number. When I Called sheree today, she said that if I have a name that I want to find out about, to tell her and she will go in her computer to see if they booked yet....well I have 80 something guests that I need to do that for.