Etiquette
Escort Card Etiquette
Can someone confirm the basic etiquette for Escort cards for me? I tried to search this topic but didn't find much.
Do you use formal titles?
For an unmarried couple do you put the female or male first? Does this change depending on who was the invited Guest and who is brought as a Guest?
Re: Escort Card Etiquette
I think technically you're supposed to put women first (I'm assuming you're asking about a couple where they have different last names), but I think we will probably put the person we're closer to first, which is how we addressed our invitations.
edited (silly grammar)
You can either do individual escort cards or put people with their dates/significant other on the same card. I couldn't fit everything onto one card, so I did everyone's separately. If you do put people on the same card, ladies should go first. (Of course, if you're doing titles, then it'd be Mr. and Mrs. John Doe, but it'd be Ms. Jane Smith and Mr. John Doe if the lady kept her maiden name.)
I read that you put whoever is your closer friend first. So if Jane Doe and John Ex are dating and coming to my wedding together, but Jane Doe is my friend and John Ex is just her BF, then you put Jane first.
Typically you would do them to match the formality of your wedding. I didn't do that, however, the first time I got married. My wedding was formal, but I didn't think the calligrapher could fit Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith easily on the small cards (I don't ever use Mr. and Mrs. John Smith). So we went with Jane and John Smith, no titles. It certainly didn't affect the formality of the wedding.
For unmarried couples, the general "rule" is women first. But again, that's not a rule I followed. We put the name first of the person we'd actually invited, whether that was the man or woman, and then their guest second.
For a GM who is bringing his Fiance, do you still put her first? We are friends with both of them but does the GM's name take priority since he is in the wedding party?
No, it's ladies first. But really, it's not a huge deal.
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And then do you put them in alphabetical order according to the first name listed?
We are not using formal titles on the cards. We are also not using formal titles on the invitations.
The woman's name is going first.
I did couples on one card, formal titles. For unmarried couples, if we were friends with both, I did ladies first. If we were clearly closer with one (like, a groomsman) we put him first. It was alphabetized by last name of the first person listeed.
I had two cases where people brought a friend or daughter because their original partner couldn't make it, so for those, since they weren't 'couples' I gave them each their own.
We did formal titles, because it was a formal party, and with just one name, well, it wasn't hard to fit.
Me too.