No pictures during the ceremony??

mandms08

Not just "no flash" (which I understand)--we were told absolutely no (eta: professional) pictures. Just wondered if anyone else has been given this stipulation? FWIW, we are not marrying in a church.

When we were told this, I was floored. We're paying a huge amount for the photog and we can't even use her to capture the MOST important part of the day? The alternative given: we could recreate any "scenes" that we want afterwards. How can you recreate your reactions as you say your vows? The look on my dad's face when he walks me down the aisle?

And did I mention it's my FFIL that will be marrying us? lol We were basically told of this policy and then FMIL followed up with a, "Will that be a problem?" We looked at each other and said yes.

His reasoning: the photogs tend to disrupt the ceremony. "They tend to completely stop the bride/groom/ceremony to take certain pictures." I have never been to a ceremony and witnessed that. The photogs are always background and barely  noticed. After I assured that my photog will not do that, he relented. Crisis averted!  But I just wondered how common that was.

Tanq&Tonic

I'm with jagore.  I've never seen a good professional photographer interrupt anything just to get a shot -- not the processional, not the ceremony, not the recessional.  I have seen "Uncle Bob" hobbyinst photographers who don't understand do obscene things, like stand behind the altar and shoot toward the guests for the entire ceremony, or block the bride on her walk down the aisle.  Maybe FFIL experienced an "Uncle Bob" in the past?

monkeysip

I've never seen a photog be disruptive either.

I've only heard of absoluetly no photog policies when it was a church ceremony.  Those, I can kinda understand.

But if its not a church ceremony, then there seems to be no reason to not allow photography.

If it's your FFIL who is saying this, can't FI talk sense into him?

TiffannieF

Ya I am curious, is it FFIL or the venue?

I have seen photogs get a little stool and hover over the B & G during rings and vows which was awkward but I've only seen that a couple times.

When we met with our photog I clarified that she is not to go on the alter at all during the ceremony. 

1 venue told us no flash, when I s/w my photog she said it would be a problem due to lighting and being a night wedding so we didn't go with that church.  Another church didn't allow video photog so we also declined that church as well. 

If the venue is the one doing this, I HIGHLY recommend going else where.  If it's your FFIL, maybe he can meet with the photog?

You do not want to miss your ceremony pics...my absolute favorite picture from the wedding is the picture of my groom when I was walking down the aisle, my second favorite was our first kiss.

entropicbeauty

That is ridiculous - I have never seen a photographer STOP any part of a ceremony just to get a picture. Good photographers know how to get the desired shots without being intrusive (and most should come equipped with telephoto lenses that allow them to get closeup shots from far away)

notyetavet

The only disruptive thing I've seen a photog do during a ceremony was accidentally trip over a potted plant.  It's their job to sneak around and be discreet. I'd ask him why he has that policy just because I'd be curious.  You are right, the ceremony is the most important part of the day and I wonder how many people just go with not getting any of it on film. 

kimiandgary

If the venue is the one doing this, I HIGHLY recommend going else where.  If it's your FFIL, maybe he can meet with the photog? You do not want to miss your ceremony pics...

This.

Simply Fated

That would be a deal breaker for me. I'd find a new venue if it was the venue. If it's the FFIL and he won't budge, I'd find someone else.

Grits8812

I have never talked with a place that said no pictures what so ever during the ceremony.  I have heard no flash allowed, but that is for obvious reasons.   

So they ended up letting you have your photographer take pictures during the ceremony, did I read that right?

mandms08

Definitely not my venue that said this. It was my FFIL's policy. I have a feeling he had one bad experience with an obnoxious photog and then made a blanket policy.

I objected and he relented. Once I explained that my photog's theory is that "you don't see me--my goal is to be part of the background" he felt better about it. Though I feel bad for all the other couples he has married that don't have actual pics our their ceremony!

Simply Fated

I feel bad for them, too. I'm glad you stood your ground.