In Memory help!

Speedchick23

Hi all,
 
I've perused the "in memory of" boards on here, but I'd like some more opinions.

I want to remember my uncle. He passed away last year and took my sister and I in when our parents passed away when we were children. My aunt (who is helping to pay for the wedding) is his widow and I don't want to offend her or have this joyous day turn sorrowful for her so I was thinking of doing something small.

I'm doing a brooch bouqet and thought of putting in a special one just for him, but the things he liked don't make good brooches!  (Poker, Bull Riding, Drag Racing, BMWs, etc.)

Any other ideas you guys might have would be great!
He really wasn't a "frou-frou" type man. Kind of gruff on the exterior, but he had the warmest heart and the best laugh my ears have ever had the pleasure of experiencing.

Our theme is vintage and our colors are mint green (David Bridal's Meadow) and lavender (DB's Wisteria) if that makes a difference.

OliveOilsMom

Is there anything that was your uncles that you could have added to the brooch bouquet?  Did he have cufflinks or any other jewelry that you could add in?  Or perhaps you could find a locket that could work, where you can add your uncles's picture?  And this is a stretch, but did he own a tie that is one of your wedding colors, you could wrap it around the handle of the bouquet?

AddieCake

I like Olive's idea. 

[Deleted User]

Talk to your aunt. Tell her that you would like to do something to honor the memory of your uncle since he was such a special part of your life. She may have something of his that she is willing to gift or loan you for the day. Maybe she even has a brooch that he gifted her at one point.  I'm sure she'll appreciate that you want to honor his memory & if you include her in on the planning, you won't catch her off guard and cause any emotional moments for her at the ceremony.

Speedchick23

These are all great ideas! Thanks ladies! I'm really hoping he had a tie (though he would rather walk around without a shirt on at all, but that's a man for ya!  

If he doesn't have a tie he might've had a shirt that was one of our colors and that would work too. I've seen some pins that mention sewing a piece of a late father's shirt into the dress. Mine has a lot of lace though so that might present a challenge. The bouquet might be easier. Oh! This would be a real stretch, but if he has multiple shirts in our colors we could make the flowers in my bouquet out of them! 

Thank you ladies! You've given me great ideas!

Ella and Pedro

And another idea....a favorite song of his - a favorite fast or slow one...whatever... for a moment in the reception, and then you could dance with your aunt, or whomever, 'in his memory.' It would not need to be mentioned, or public, or in the program, or anything.  Just...something you did.

jrwinterbride

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_in-memory-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:64c25de2-9838-44af-b783-75323bd55328Post:f5abf429-437f-497d-b440-1ccdc1a0121f">In Memory help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi all,   I've perused the "in memory of" boards on here, but I'd like some more opinions. I want to remember my uncle. He passed away last year and took my sister and I in when our parents passed away when we were children. My aunt (who is helping to pay for the wedding) is his widow and I don't want to offend her or have this joyous day turn sorrowful for her so I was thinking of doing something small. I'm doing a brooch bouqet and thought of putting in a special one just for him, but the things he liked don't make good brooches!   (Poker, Bull Riding, Drag Racing, BMWs, etc.) Any other ideas you guys might have would be great! He really wasn't a "frou-frou" type man. Kind of gruff on the exterior, but he had the warmest heart and the best laugh my ears have ever had the pleasure of experiencing. Our theme is vintage and our colors are mint green (David Bridal's Meadow) and lavender (DB's Wisteria) if that makes a difference.
Posted by Speedchick23[/QUOTE]

jrwinterbride

Hi, I haven't read thru everything,,so I don't know if this suggestion has been made. I lost my brother, my best friend in the world and best bro and just best guy, He would have been my fiancé's best man. He passed in September 2012 very unexpectedly from heart failure due to kidney disease and I was devastated,. He was such a great man, husband, son, father, nephew that I want our wedding to be a complete celebration to give us all a chance at a new start with a new family member. A board seems to heavy and life the funeral all over again. And you loved one would want this to be your day. What I plan to do is take a small part of a blue shirt or sock or kerchief of his, cut it into a heart, it can be small or medium size, and sew it to the OUTSIDE BACK of my dress. During the ceremony only immediate family will know it is there and during the reception everyone else can see it and if you like you can share what it is at the reception with just a few words and then move on to the party. Even a moment of silent prayer. If it has been a while since your Uncle passed and you don't have anything blue (to use for your something blue) I would suggest purchasing a small piece of blue material and embroidering his initials on it before you sew it to your dress. Either way, after the wedding, you can remove it and frame it and keep it in your home to always remember how you paid special tribute and remembered his presence (because he will be their in spirit) on the most special day of your life. Hope this helps. Many blessings on your new life! Denise

tompkgl

These are all wonderful ideas. We were recently at a wedding that had gorgeous boquets on the church steps. On the back of the program it read "you may have noticed the boquets on the steps, these are in memory of Uncle so and so, Uncle Jo and my cousin Jack who couldnt be with us today. It was a very subtle but very meaningful mention of them. So as not to be glum about the day, it was perfectly subtle.

Speedchick23

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_in-memory-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:64c25de2-9838-44af-b783-75323bd55328Post:7b76bed7-2947-4b76-a4ed-b84530eeadc0">Re: In Memory help!</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi, I haven't read thru everything,,so I don't know if this suggestion has been made. I lost my brother, my best friend in the world and best bro and just best guy, He would have been my fiancé's best man. He passed in September 2012 very unexpectedly from heart failure due to kidney disease and I was devastated,. He was such a great man, husband, son, father, nephew that I want our wedding to be a complete celebration to give us all a chance at a new start with a new family member. A board seems to heavy and life the funeral all over again. And you loved one would want this to be your day. What I plan to do is take a small part of a blue shirt or sock or kerchief of his, cut it into a heart, it can be small or medium size, and sew it to the OUTSIDE BACK of my dress. During the ceremony only immediate family will know it is there and during the reception everyone else can see it and if you like you can share what it is at the reception with just a few words and then move on to the party. Even a moment of silent prayer. If it has been a while since your Uncle passed and you don't have anything blue (to use for your something blue) I would suggest purchasing a small piece of blue material and embroidering his initials on it before you sew it to your dress. Either way, after the wedding, you can remove it and frame it and keep it in your home to always remember how you paid special tribute and remembered his presence (because he will be their in spirit) on the most special day of your life. Hope this helps. Many blessings on your new life! Denise
Posted by jrwinterbride[/QUOTE]

<div>I saw something similar to this on Pinterest the other day, but removing it and framing it later is a wonderful idea! I'm sorry for you loss, but it makes me happy that you have chosen to celebrate him in such a happy way. Thank you for your post.</div>

Grozikn

I am honoring my stepdad who passed by having my brother play a Beatles song on his guitar... here comes the sun... As our exit song. Beatles were his favorite, and those who knew him will know what the song means.