Handling pictures on a time crunch

kpeterson21

I’ve been given an ultimatum and I’m not sure if it’s a battle worth picking.

                My mom is very against “first look” photos and a month ago there was no reasoning with her. But when we booked our reception hall we have 45 minutes between the end of the ceremony and start of dinner. Not much time at all especially when she adamantly wants the receiving line as the guests leave the chapel and head to the reception hall for cocktails. (Both locations are on the same property). My mom has many requests and although I know she only wants the best for me and is financially supporting 90% of the event I can’t help but feel like my hands are tied. Most of her wishes I’m going with the flow but pictures are really important to me. I would really like to have the bridal party, immediate family, and first look photos completed before the ceremony so they are not rushed leaving time for extended family. When I expressed my concern regarding time I was given an absolute no and then a choice. If I want first look photos – her and my dad get front row seats while my FI and I are taking photos. I’m not a very affectionate person in public and with my parents eyes on me I’m afraid I’ll be reserved and miss one of those ‘magic moment’ pictures. So.. do I stand my ground and hope for the best – or does anyone have suggestions to help accommodate the both of us.

theretamaragoes

You stand your ground.

I respect that your Mom is paying for much of your wedding... but she really seems like a bit of a bully in this situation. I am not sure why she feels like she HAS to be there when the photos are taken? Does she not trust or like your photographer?

If I were you, I would say, "Mom. I deeply appreciate all you have done for us, and I know that you have your own valid opinons and ideas. However, doing 'First Look' photos privately is extremely important to me & my fiance so we will be doing the photos on our own, before the ceremony. ' am sorry if this upsets you. Know that I love you and respect your opinions." Then leave it at that. You're a big girl, you don't need your Mom to LOVE all of your decisions, after all.

Also worth considering is that some photographers will not even ALLOW an audience while doing those photos. I am a photographer myself, and when I meet with Clients initially, I make sure that they understand that I work best without family & guests hanging over my shoulders.  

 

proudMrsG

I am with Tamara this is your wedding and your pictures. Photography is very important to all of us. Once the cake has been eaten and all the guests have left that's the only thing you'll have to remember the day. Not seeing each other until the ceremony is such an arcaic tradition. There are so many great reason to do a first look! My photographer tried to talk me into it and now I regret not having it done. 

QueerFemme

You could do all of the photos of everyone except you and the groom before the ceremony.  And after the ceremony, it would only be the photos of you & groom, and a handful of both of you and the family.   That likely won't take a lot of time as long as you have everyone really organized. 

So, you and all of your BMs and he and all of his guys.  You and your parents, you and his parents, he and your parents/his parents, etc.  That should only leave a handful of photos to take after the ceremony.