Do I or don't I register?

donjoe2448

So my FH and I have been together for 12 years...... we have a house, kids, pretty much a whole life and all we need is that piece of paper legally binding us for life (besides the whole having-kids thing LOL   and please no snide remarks about having kids before marriage.....)  So since we have everything that a registry is supposed to give you, do I still register?  I hardly doubt  that I will have a bridal shower so I dont need to worry about registering for gifts for that.  And I am not even sure if people would think to buy gifts since we pretty much have everything. I am worried they would think "They have this already why do they need another one...." Just wanting some opinions..... NICE ones please

hoffse

In Response to Re: Do I or don't I register?:
[QUOTE]I think you should do a small registry. There are tons of stuff you can replace - new pillows, sheets, towels. Also, think outside the box a little. We got a paper shredder, safe, little carpet cleaning machines, tv trays, a kick ass new kitchen garbage can, luggage set, a new tent etc.
Posted by scribe95[/QUOTE]

I agree with this.  Most people simply won't show up to a wedding without a gift.  In your circumstance I would absolutely bring a gift.  I am not a person who likes to give cash, and when there is no registry I pick something out on my own.  Typically this takes the form of a crystal platter or vase.

The only reason kids are relevant in this conversation is that you DON'T register for items for them. Now, maybe an extra set of twin sheets would be fine, but don't register for a full on hot pink teen bedding set with purple flowers for your daughter, complete with shams, comforter, and bed skirt KWIM?  Same thing goes with registering for pet items - that's a no no (though once in awhile I see somebody register for maybe one pet item that's super adorable and they get it).  Just do this sort of thing sparingly because wedding gifts are really for the couple to use in their household together.

It's also fine to not register.  Just know that you will probably get some boxed items that make you scratch your head (plus 100 picture frames).  H and I got probably 90% boxed items, and we had entire groups of people shop elsewhere than our registry.  Most of the time it was fine - we got some really incredible gifts that guests put a lot of thought into.  But I mean, we also ended up with the butterfly platter and the ceramic egg plate with technicolor fish painted on it (I secretly sort of like the egg plate but H thinks it's awful).  You will get off-registry gifts no matter what, but you will likely get many many more if you don't register.  Most guests who want to gives boxed gifts will stick with the registry because they recognize that they don't know you well enough to determine what will work in your household and what you need.  So I say make a small registry - not everybody has an appreciation for the technicolor fish egg plate.

MayberryAfterMidnight

Though FI and I have also been living together for years, I eventually did decide to register because my mom insisted people wanted to give physical gifts...It's perfectly fine not to register, but as PPs have said, be prepared for some things that you might not be thrilled with. (It goes without saying you should still accept them graciously and write a nice thank-you note.) I will admit, I have struggled just to come up with 10 items on my registry, but they're all things I need. Is there anything around the house you've been meaning to replace or upgrade but just never got around to it? Keep in mind that if you have a small registry, people will also get the hint and (if they're inclined to give a gift, which is of course not required) will most likely give cash.