Asking Friend to Officiate

kjtollefson

Hello all!

I've posted a few times on the other boards, but I need some advice. My fiance and I are a hetero couple, but we really want to ask one of our great friends--who happens to be gay--to officiate our wedding. We're more than willing to pay any possible fees he might have in order to become ordained and will offer to pay him, but FI and I are nervous that it might be insensitive to ask him to help us get married when he is legally not allowed to in our state (which is completely stupid, but that's a different topic for another post).

Basically: how would you feel if we asked you to officiate our wedding? Honored or slighted?

I appreciate any and all feedback!

QueerFemme

kjtollefson said:

Hello all!

I've posted a few times on the other boards, but I need some advice. My fiance and I are a hetero couple, but we really want to ask one of our great friends--who happens to be gay--to officiate our wedding. We're more than willing to pay any possible fees he might have in order to become ordained and will offer to pay him, but FI and I are nervous that it might be insensitive to ask him to help us get married when he is legally not allowed to in our state (which is completely stupid, but that's a different topic for another post).

Basically: how would you feel if we asked you to officiate our wedding? Honored or slighted?

I appreciate any and all feedback!

I would be honored.  You aren't the ones voting to prohibit him from getting married (I assume) and I'm sure he knows that. 

townchungwedding

I'd be honored as well. I've been the witness and a groomsman for different friends weddings. I wouldn't worry too much... It doesn't seem like you are the "type" that have an issue with your friend being able to marry, and he probably would want you to support you, as much as he wants to be supported. I'd have to say most of "us" on here are the same.

SheMarie82

I would be honored. He obviously is very important to you, and hopefully feels the same way back.  Michigan does not yet recognize same sex marriage, but my BIL performed the ceremony just like he would any straight marriage.  I know that is the opposite of what you are asking, but it is all about respect of the marriage and the process. 

luckyus10

I would be honored too, I think that as your friend they would be willing to look past your concerns and do it because they love you and are happy to do something for you on your special day.