Invitation Wording Okay?

acj928

Hi everyone,

After reading different variations of invitation wording, I'm going crazy.  They are all blending together and sounding weird to me.  Is this wording okay?  We are paying for the wedding ourselves and it's a secular wedding.

My name &

Groom's name

Request the pleasure of your company

at their marriage ceremony

Saturday, the twenty ninth of march

two thousand and fourteen

half past seven o'clock in the evening

venue

city

reception immediately to follow

We originally had "request the pleasure of your company at the celebration of their marriage" but I started to think that sounded like we already got married.  I read somewhere here that "honor of your presence" means church wedding and "pleasure of your company' means anywhere else - is that true?  

Thank you

Jen4948

Use the following wording instead:

The pleasure of your company is requested
at the marriage of
acj928
and
Groom
Saturday, the twenty-ninth of March (that's my parents' anniversary!)
Two thousand and fourteen
at half-past seven o'clock (in the evening is understood)
Venue name
Address
City, State

Couples hosting their own weddings should use the third person as above, because technically they aren't supposed to host events in their own honor.  This wording gets you around that.

banana468

Jen is on track but there are a few changes:

Do not capitalize the T in the year.

The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

acj928

Thanks!  I originally thought I couldn't put our names in the middle that way (the template I am using put our names on top based on bride and groom hosting).  But, I played around with it and put the template as one set of parent's hosting but just changed the words.

Jen4948

banana468 said:

Jen is on track but there are a few changes: Do not capitalize the T in the year. The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

This isn't correct.

NYCMercedes

I recommend the etiquette section for wedding invitations on the Crane's paper website for wording. http://www.crane.com/etiquette/wedding/wedding-invitations

acj928

The font is "Mrs. Eaves All Small Caps" so don't worry about capital letters - they all look capital but small.

Maggie0829

Actually the first letter of the year can be capitalized or it can be put in lowercase...either way is appropriate.

And @acj928 - that is the font that I was going to suggest to use so that way you won't have to worry about whether or not to capitalize or not.

banana468

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Jen is on track but there are a few changes:

Do not capitalize the T in the year.

The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

This isn't correct.


You are correct that it will look more polished to capitalize the T but it isn't required.

southernbelle0915

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Jen is on track but there are a few changes: Do not capitalize the T in the year. The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

This isn't correct.

Yes it is....

http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/wedding-invitations-and-announcements/335-wording-formal-wedding-invitations

The capitalization of 'T' doesn't matter either way, but as far as half past vs. half after, half after is definitely correct and, no, it is not hyphenated.

Jen4948

southernbelle0915 said:

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Jen is on track but there are a few changes: Do not capitalize the T in the year. The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

This isn't correct.

Yes it is....

http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/wedding-invitations-and-announcements/335-wording-formal-wedding-invitations

The capitalization of 'T' doesn't matter either way, but as far as half past vs. half after, half after is definitely correct and, no, it is not hyphenated.

Emily Post is not always right.  Also, I don't think anyone is really going to notice or care whether it's half-after or hyphenated or not-as long as it makes clear that the time is 7:30.

southernbelle0915

Jen4948 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Jen is on track but there are a few changes: Do not capitalize the T in the year. The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

This isn't correct.

Yes it is....

http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/wedding-invitations-and-announcements/335-wording-formal-wedding-invitations

The capitalization of 'T' doesn't matter either way, but as far as half past vs. half after, half after is definitely correct and, no, it is not hyphenated.

Emily Post is not always right.  Also, I don't think anyone is really going to notice or care whether it's half-after or hyphenated or not-as long as it makes clear that the time is 7:30.

What source are you using that cites "half-past" as the proper wording? I've never heard of that from a reputable etiquette wording source...

Maggie0829

Whenever I hear "half-past" I immediately think of the saying "half past a monkey's ass and a quarter to his balls".

Jen4948

southernbelle0915 said:

Jen4948 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Jen is on track but there are a few changes: Do not capitalize the T in the year. The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

This isn't correct.

Yes it is....

http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/wedding-invitations-and-announcements/335-wording-formal-wedding-invitations

The capitalization of 'T' doesn't matter either way, but as far as half past vs. half after, half after is definitely correct and, no, it is not hyphenated.

Emily Post is not always right.  Also, I don't think anyone is really going to notice or care whether it's half-after or hyphenated or not-as long as it makes clear that the time is 7:30.

What source are you using that cites "half-past" as the proper wording? I've never heard of that from a reputable etiquette wording source...

I've never hear of one that makes a distinction other than Emily Post, and she gets other things wrong, so I don't consider her reliable.

banana468

Crane's is a far more reputable source for invitation etiquette. They state that it looks cohesive to capitalize the T but it was not done previously.

They also state that the time is half after and not past.

You can argue what you think but understand that there ARE etiquette rules for invitation wording and stating that the use of half past and hyphens is no big deal is the wording equivalent of "my guests would rather I have a cash bar rather than no bar so this is fine. "

RedJacks25

Jen4948 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Jen is on track but there are a few changes: Do not capitalize the T in the year. The time is half after and is not hyphenated.

This isn't correct.

Yes it is....

http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/wedding-invitations-and-announcements/335-wording-formal-wedding-invitations

The capitalization of 'T' doesn't matter either way, but as far as half past vs. half after, half after is definitely correct and, no, it is not hyphenated.

Emily Post is not always right.  Also, I don't think anyone is really going to notice or care whether it's half-after or hyphenated or not-as long as it makes clear that the time is 7:30.

I'd notice. And be irritated by it.

LiLe422

banana468 said:

Crane's is a far more reputable source for invitation etiquette. They state that it looks cohesive to capitalize the T but it was not done previously. They also state that the time is half after and not past. You can argue what you think but understand that there ARE etiquette rules for invitation wording and stating that the use of half past and hyphens is no big deal is the wording equivalent of "my guests would rather I have a cash bar rather than no bar so this is fine. "

^All of this^

Jen4948

banana468 said:

Crane's is a far more reputable source for invitation etiquette. They state that it looks cohesive to capitalize the T but it was not done previously. They also state that the time is half after and not past. You can argue what you think but understand that there ARE etiquette rules for invitation wording and stating that the use of half past and hyphens is no big deal is the wording equivalent of "my guests would rather I have a cash bar rather than no bar so this is fine. "

Bullshit.  Half-after and half-past is not the equivalent of cash bar vs. no bar.

Some people might be irritated, but in the long run, no one is cheated by one wording as opposed to another.  Cash bars are a very different story.  This is comparing apples to oranges.

banana468

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Crane's is a far more reputable source for invitation etiquette. They state that it looks cohesive to capitalize the T but it was not done previously.

They also state that the time is half after and not past.

You can argue what you think but understand that there ARE etiquette rules for invitation wording and stating that the use of half past and hyphens is no big deal is the wording equivalent of "my guests would rather I have a cash bar rather than no bar so this is fine. "

Bullshit.  Half-after and half-past is not the equivalent of cash bar vs. no bar.

Some people might be irritated, but in the long run, no one is cheated by one wording as opposed to another.  Cash bars are a very different story.  This is comparing apples to oranges.


My point is that you're advising to do something incorrect and you aren't acknowledging that your advice is to do the incorrect thing. If you don't like the analogy so be it. Just stop advising others that breaking rules isn't a big deal.

acj928

Where does the half-after vs. half-past thing come from?  I mean I rarely hear anyone refer to the time as half past whatever.. but I at least have heard of that.  I have never ever ever heard of half-after 7 in my life until this post.  I tried googling and I couldn't find anything.  I thought maybe it was a British phrase - but didn't find confirmation of that.  Anyone know?

Jen4948

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

Crane's is a far more reputable source for invitation etiquette. They state that it looks cohesive to capitalize the T but it was not done previously. They also state that the time is half after and not past. You can argue what you think but understand that there ARE etiquette rules for invitation wording and stating that the use of half past and hyphens is no big deal is the wording equivalent of "my guests would rather I have a cash bar rather than no bar so this is fine. "

Bullshit.  Half-after and half-past is not the equivalent of cash bar vs. no bar.

Some people might be irritated, but in the long run, no one is cheated by one wording as opposed to another.  Cash bars are a very different story.  This is comparing apples to oranges.

My point is that you're advising to do something incorrect and you aren't acknowledging that your advice is to do the incorrect thing. If you don't like the analogy so be it. Just stop advising others that breaking rules isn't a big deal.

That's because I'm not and I won't.  In this instance I do not agree with you.

I also think that there are things worth getting pissy about and things that are not.  Cash bars, potluck receptions, b-listing, how deceased people are remembered fall in the first category.  Whether or not "half-past" as opposed to "half-after" is used, hyphenating, and whether or not the year begins with a capital letter on an invitation fall  in the second.  Getting worked up over things in the second category really wastes time and energy.

southernbelle0915

@Jen4948 - I don't disagree with you that half-past versus half after is a victimless etiquette crime.... but it's a fact that there IS a right way to do it and a wrong way to do it - "half after" is correct and "half-past" is not. We all learn from each other so it's no big deal to learn that there IS a correct answer for it.

I don't agree with @banana468's analogy of the cash bar, but I know exactly what she's trying to say about advising people to do the right thing versus telling someone it's ok to the do wrong thing just because it's your opinion. I'll try a different analogy - if I got an invitation where the B&G were hosting and they wrote it in the first person (versus the third person - which is the correct way to do it), I would consider this a victimless crime because I'd still be able to gather the "who when what where". HOWEVER, first person is absolutely NOT the correct way to write a wedding invitation and since I know what IS the correct way to address is, I would consider these people ill-informed of proper invitation wording. 

So I think what people are trying to say is that it's fine if you didn't know that - no big deal. It wasn't something I knew when I first starting learning wedding stuff. But if you DID/DO know and you're trying to defend it because of a personal preference, it turns out to be bad advice. If you were to say "whoa, really? I didn't know that!" Then fine, cool. But it seems like you're trying to defend "half-past" like it's ok when it's not correct. Like, just because you prefer something and don't believe Emily Post/Cranes/other reputable sources, doesn't mean you should tell other people to do it (hence banana's cash bar example). KWIM? It's better to tell other people the correct way to do it and then if they decide they LOVE "half-past" versus "half after" and they don't give a shit if they come off as ill-informed, then fine. At least they know what's correct.

banana468

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Jen4948 said:

banana468 said:

Crane's is a far more reputable source for invitation etiquette. They state that it looks cohesive to capitalize the T but it was not done previously.

They also state that the time is half after and not past.

You can argue what you think but understand that there ARE etiquette rules for invitation wording and stating that the use of half past and hyphens is no big deal is the wording equivalent of "my guests would rather I have a cash bar rather than no bar so this is fine. "

Bullshit.  Half-after and half-past is not the equivalent of cash bar vs. no bar.

Some people might be irritated, but in the long run, no one is cheated by one wording as opposed to another.  Cash bars are a very different story.  This is comparing apples to oranges.

My point is that you're advising to do something incorrect and you aren't acknowledging that your advice is to do the incorrect thing. If you don't like the analogy so be it. Just stop advising others that breaking rules isn't a big deal.

That's because I'm not and I won't.  In this instance I do not agree with you.



It isn't just a matter of agreement. You are wrong and won't admit it. You can think it isn't a big deal but you can't think it's OK anymore than I can argue that it is OK to speed. I can do that and get away with it but it's wrong and I shouldn't advise others to do that without first acknowledging that it's not correct.

NYCMercedes

I agree with banana.

huskypuppy14

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

Crane's is a far more reputable source for invitation etiquette. They state that it looks cohesive to capitalize the T but it was not done previously. They also state that the time is half after and not past. You can argue what you think but understand that there ARE etiquette rules for invitation wording and stating that the use of half past and hyphens is no big deal is the wording equivalent of "my guests would rather I have a cash bar rather than no bar so this is fine. "

Bullshit.  Half-after and half-past is not the equivalent of cash bar vs. no bar.

Some people might be irritated, but in the long run, no one is cheated by one wording as opposed to another.  Cash bars are a very different story.  This is comparing apples to oranges.

My point is that you're advising to do something incorrect and you aren't acknowledging that your advice is to do the incorrect thing. If you don't like the analogy so be it. Just stop advising others that breaking rules isn't a big deal.

That's because I'm not and I won't.  In this instance I do not agree with you.

It isn't just a matter of agreement. You are wrong and won't admit it. You can think it isn't a big deal but you can't think it's OK anymore than I can argue that it is OK to speed. I can do that and get away with it but it's wrong and I shouldn't advise others to do that without first acknowledging that it's not correct.

Would someone explain why half after is correct and half past is not? I'm getting married at 5:30 and was planning on using half past because I have never seen half after, only half past on other wedding invitations.  I also think saying Emily Post says so, isn't a good enough reason. Other wedding etiquette faux pas, like cash bars, makes sense (to reasonable people) why it's wrong. 

acj928

laurynm84 said: Would someone explain why half after is correct and half past is not? I'm getting married at 5:30 and was planning on using half past because I have never seen half after, only half past on other wedding invitations.  I also think saying Emily Post says so, isn't a good enough reason. Other wedding etiquette faux pas, like cash bars, makes sense (to reasonable people) why it's wrong. 


Yes I'd like to know as well.  I understand that it just is the proper etiquette but I want to know where it came from.  I never hear anyone say that or write it anywhere else.  Is it a particular phrase unique to wedding invitations?  Why? Is it an American tradition or from somewhere else? etc.

banana468

I can't find the origin but I've heard it mentioned that past evokes the feelings of those no longer with us and is used for funerals.

nannersbanners

@acj928 This is what I used however, wedding is planned within 2 months and all of a sudden I'm told we are are now having aisle and chairs... I'm sure your invites will turn out beautifully. Besides, they are just invites

no church, no aisle, no chairs…<?xml:namespace prefix = "o" ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

please join us for a celebration of love, friendship, laughter, and family

as

Bride

&

Groom

 

exchange vows and
celebrate their marriage at

  

saturday, november 2, 2013
at 10:45 in the morning

please arrive by 10am

shuttle services provided to ceremony

 

food, fun, and

festivities to follow at

 

 

banana468

nannersbanners said:

@acj928 This is what I used however, wedding is planned within 2 months and all of a sudden I'm told we are are now having aisle and chairs... I'm sure your invites will turn out beautifully. Besides, they are just invites

no
church, no aisle, no chairs…<?xml:namespace prefix = "o" ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

please
join us for a celebration of love, friendship, laughter, and family

as

Bride

&

Groom

 

exchange
vows and

celebrate their marriage at

  

saturday,
november 2, 2013

at 10:45 in the morning

please arrive by 10am

shuttle services provided to ceremony

 

food,
fun, and

festivities
to follow at

 

 

Please don't use that wording. It isn't worded correctly and is filled with etiquette blunders.

Lored

Crap. I used half past on my invites. However, I'm NOT having a cash bar ))