We are both widowers who lost spouses 3 years ago to cancer and have found one another. Such joy! We have 2 children each -- 19 & 20, and 19 & 23 -- who all still live at home -- 3 of them in college right now, but commute. Our families, right now live 45 minutes away from each other. Kids seem to like one another on the surface, but with their independent lives, girlfriends/boyfriends, jobs, schools, activities and friends, barely have time to get to know each other. However, we just brought up the topic of moving together (no room in either of our present houses.) So we all need to purge, fix things up, repaint everywhere and list our homes and move together into a larger home which can accommodate everyone. At first, the kids applauded our relationship... wanting us to be happy. Now they are reluctant and resistant to change. We are trying to involve the kids in decisions and house hunting, but one (the only girl) is particularly upset about losing her home. Our philosophy is that a house is not a HOME... it is where you are loved as a family... but she wants no part of that. Do you have any advice for us in combining our families and moving, to ease the transition, which we hope takes place over the next year before the wedding? And NO... the kids do not pay anything to live with us, although they are over 18.
Thanks, and good luck to all of you brides.