Wedding and then...baby???

floridasarah · December 2010

We already have a child (not a planned pregnancy at all) and I really wish we had had some alone time together. We are going to start trying for #2 next March (6 weeks before the big day) and only have a limited window (he's in the military) so we only have until June and if nothing we will try again around Christmas. Also I was 31 when our son was born and will probably be 35 when the next one comes.

nish0822 · December 2010

i totally feel blogger bride teetooshort. my fI and i have been together for almost 6 years. we plan to marry november 2011, he will be 32 by then i will be 28. although we're young to an extent we're still no spring chickens. as teens and young women we worry ourselves to death about making sure to not get pregnant then when we want to, it sometimes is not as easy. personally i would love to enjoy being the mrs for a few years before becoming the mommy but we all know a womans fertility starts to decline usually after 27. the good thing is although we would just be starting out as man and wife next fall, we actually have had almost 6 years of 'just us". so i think we may plan to wait 6-9months and see if we feel ready about TTC.

TheKnittingJedi · December 2010

My FI and I decided we would wait about two or three years after we are married to have kids, so we can enjoy being married and having it be just us for awhile! I'll be 26-27 at that point and I feel ok about that. I definitely want to wait, I am disbelief with the five or six girls from my high school that started popping babies out right after graduation.

ForeverEverAfter · December 2010

I agree that it depends on the person. As long as not wanting to wait til 30 is your only reason

I'm 23, I'll be 24 (FI 26) when we marry in the fall, and we plan to start right away. We are kid-people and want a big family. We also have a house, a dog and good careers already, so it works for us. I also agree with what other people said about lifestyle change. Make sure its an informed decision-your life WILL change!

jonihelen · December 2010

We already have a two year old together. When we get married next May we'll start trying soon after. I don't want our kids to be too far apart in age. Really looking forward to it!

thecooks2011 · December 2010

my FI and I are gong to start on our wedding night. we will be 34 and 38 at the time of the ceremony, and our birthdays are a couple months later. we want kids sooner rather than later. plus i have a child from a previous relationship and she will be 5 at the time of the wedding, and i dont want there to be a huge age gap between them.

alexandriabcw · December 2010

My fiance and I are waiting 1-2 years after we are married to TTC. We will be 24 and 25 and although we are eager to have children, we want time to settle a bit and make sure we are prepared to be the best parents we can be.

gusjaim · December 2010

One of my big things was having kids young. I'm 23 and found out a whole 3 days after getting engaged that we were also expecting. Though this was completely unplanned its been fantastic and has made me realize that you are never gonna be ready and the whole "waiting till your finically stable, in the ideal home, etc.." Is pointless. Baby's are hard and will be just as hard then as now. You kinda sound like me with the def wanting before I'm thirty and I think as long as you and hubby are on the same page just go for it. I mean me and FI have been together 4 years already we don't need a couple years of being married. It's already been just the two of us, a ring doesn't change that.

reason00 · December 2010

Maybe you shouldn't have a baby right now. Babies aren't temporary. You don't have a baby ASAP because you don't want to be an old mommy.

Have a baby because you genuinely want to raise a child and can provide for a child.

It reminds me of women that get dogs to match their outfits.

wdb&mcm · December 2010

Im 25, getting married next September. My fiance is 30. We are planning on buying a house within our first year of marriage and then once we have a house we are a go for a baby! Why wait? We are in love, both love kids and ready to go!

chantellem1990 · December 2010

We already have 2 kids and we're getting married in 7 mnths!! lol there's definately no wrong or right way to do things, so if you feel ready go for it! we arent living in 1960

buut.. just keep in mind kids ARE a lot of work and stress and money! so do enjoy your time together before them.

Marissa&Brad · December 2010

I'm 26, engaged, and we're getting married in April 2011. We're going to start trying right away just because we're both VERY ready to have kids, but also because we've been together since we were in high school, so we have a very strong, solid relationship. If you feel ready to have kids, no one should stop you, but you're right to think about it, too. No one can ever be COMPLETELY ready for children if you've never had them and if you have the time, be sure to take it. Start when you've been married for 6-8 mos. That means you'd be able to enjoy a full year or more before the baby comes to enjoy your newly married life together. Best of luck!

kaylamae4 · December 2010

We are also getting married in september 2011, and had our baby boy in November of 2009, best advice I can give is wait until your ready! Having a baby changes so many things, because its no longer all about just you 2 anymore. Enjoy your time together!

lillolo · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_wedding-thenbaby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:876edce9-72fb-430b-b2d6-cefbd5a5c80aPost:88b7f568-16d2-474d-a5df-249aef403de9">Re: Wedding and then...baby???</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm 24. 5 years and then we'll talk about possibly starting to TTC, that's the promise. Considering that my gut reaction when my period is even a single day late is less, "I might be pregnant, how are we going to prepare for a baby?" than <strong>"Vacuum that sucker out of me NOW,"</strong>I'm pretty sure I'm not ready. We want to enjoy the little things, like free time and disposable income, before we sign over the next 18 years of our lives. Sorry if I'm a little vehement about it, but SSIL just had a baby and all the, "Oh, you guys are next!" talk is making me stabby.
Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]

That's horrible! Think before you type! Disgusting

Storytime · December 2010

I'm 22, FH is 25, and we're getting married in Aug '11, so we'll be 23 and 26. We both love babies and are excited to start a family, but we've already decided to enjoy being married for a year or two while we're still young, so we can travel and do crazy things you can't do with small ones in tow. Things like touring the world, staying in another country for a month living as artists, and other things that would be difficult with kids and foolish if we wait until kids grow up and move out. If you don't feel like there's anything like that to get out of your system with your partner-in-crime, (and if your job wouldn't really allow for that sort of thing anyway), there's no harm in jumping right into starting a family. As long as you truly believe it's the right thing for the two of you, no one should be able to talk you out of it.

hmi0114 · December 2010

I would like for us to wait...I'll be 32 next month and my FH turned 30 in July. Some say I'm getting too old to have kids, but I don't believe them. My aunt had both of hers well past the age of 30. I'd like for us to enjoy the honeymoon phase and each other and just finally being husband and wife before we even think about bringing a child of our own into the picture. My FH has a child from a previous marriage so I'm already part time mommy to her, I love her like my own, but I do want us to have one one day just not right away so we can enjoy being together

_Dagney_ · December 2010

My advice is to appreciate that you don't HAVE to make a decision one way or the other, just yet.

Background: I was recently diagnosed with very large fibroid tumors. I'm going to be scheduling surgery in the next month or so. My doctor said that while there is every reason to believe that they will be able to save my uterus and preserve my ability to have children...that the tumors will likely grow back and that if we want a family we should start trying as early as 3 months after surgery.

We haven't even set a wedding date yet.

We were planning on spring 2012, but now it looks like fall 2011 is going to be as far as we can safely push it. And that we should start ttc almost immediately thereafter.

Talk about pressure. We just moved and really could have used the extra time to save, but things like this really put everything into perspective.

soontobemrsdrennan · December 2010

Im 26 and my Fi is 30 were not getting married till aug of 2011 and we both decided we wanted to enjoy married life for a year or more till we even start trying. enjoy the time you have with your husband because once a baby is in the picture everything will change. enjoy your life you are still really young. i use to think the same things your thinking but thats changed for me i always thought the clock was ticking but i realized 28 29 is not old at all so enjoy it while you can.

jemmini6 · December 2010

I will be 24 and FI will be 28 when we get married. We haven't set a timeline, such as...we will be married X amount of years before we start trying because we don't want to lock ourselves into some arbitrary line of events. We aren't ready to have kids now, so we don't really talk about it now. We both know that we want some time to still be selfish (ie, traveling whenever we want, buying splurge items, going out for a beer, etc) and when we feel we've done what we've wanted to do and are ready to settle down, then we will start the family discussion. Who knows if it'll be within 1 year, 2 years, 5 years, etc...regardless, only we will know when the time is right for us.

NicoleMaher · December 2010

I always flop back and forth on kids and when I want them but I have a feeling sooner orlater it will all come together when it is supposed to. Often times when we dont plan things out they seem to go smoother than when we do!

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