Anyone not enjoy their wedding?

sonjim · October 2009

I got married on September 26 and I'm sadden to say that the day was not good. Every time I think about the wedding day I want to cry. My DH and I were engaged for 8 months and there was a lot of stress and pressure from both sides of our families during the wedding planning. The rehearsal dinner was a nightmare and I spent the night before the wedding on my friends couch crying for over a hour because of the way my DH & my family & bridal party was behaving. When the wedding day arrived I just wanted to get it over with. My sister was a bridesmaid and fainted during the middle of the ceremony and had to be carried out of the church. Despite that majority of the people who attended says it was one of the most beautiful weddings and receptions that they attended. I cant get over the emotional drama to appreciate any part of my wedding day. My DH & I honeymooned in Maui and had a great time and married life so far is great but every time I think of the wedding I think of it as a horrible day. I feel alone because when most people describe their wedding they say it was the best day of their life but that's far from true for me. Can anyone else relate?

jlaroo33 · October 2009

Can you try and focus on what you DID like about your wedding? Of course there are going to be parts of the day that didn't go as planned, and I'm not trying to minimize your problems, but you will drive yourself crazy if that's all you base the day on. In the end, you and your husband got married and that to me is a pretty good day!

kaesha · October 2009

Our day was pretty freakin' awesome, but that's neither here nor there. I know a few people who had a craptacular day.I hate the idea that the wedding day is the happiest day of your life. Seriously? Like, your entire married life is downhill after that? It's just one day, and some day (hopefully) you'll be able to look back and not be bothered by it.

classygrl11 · October 2009

Oh trust me, I can definitely relate. So many things went wrong at our wedding I never even imagined that this was possible....We ran out of time for pictures because my makeup took an hour longer than it should have so I have no getting ready pictures at all besides my makeup, the guests arrived close to 2 hours early for the ceremony so we couldn't take family pictures because everyone was staring at us, noone could figure out how to bustle my dress and so I was tripping over it during our first dance and had to stop the dance, our food was not what we had at the tasting, and now I just saw our photographer's pictures and I don't have one of us kissing during the ceremony or during the cake cutting, absolutely no detail shots of the reception and soo many others that its just disappointing. I can definitely relate to your situation and everytime I think back on my wedding day I can't believe how many things went wrong and how ready I was for the entire day to be over. Oh well, can't change it now so atleast I enjoyed and absolutely had a blast on my honeymoon and well I am married and that's all that matters

Gardini5 · October 2009

But.....You're married! And that's amazing!!!!

greenbean79 · October 2009

I agree...try to focus on the positive things about your wedding. I also don't believe that your wedding should be the 'happiest' day of your life. I personally don't like being the centre of attention and don't really like having my picture taken so i am not expecting it to be the happiest day of my life at all...it may just be the most stressful day. I am sorry you had bad experiences with your bridal party and families...i am going through that now too and it does take away some of the joy of planning and general excitement.But now that you are married, try focusing on your relationship and all the good times to come...a wedding is only one day in your life and in my opinion, is way too overrated!

Hazel_B · October 2009

I agree with some of the other posts, try to focus on the positive points. Maybe over time you'll look back on some of the bad stuff with a smile, shrug of the shoulders and a head shake. At my friends wedding, the limo got a flat tire. The only replacement they could get was an SUV limo. Yes, better than what they paid for, but it was decorated in a Coors Light design.

psycotic_penguin · October 2009

only thing i didnt like was that my mum and me were stressed out for about 2 hours of the getting ready time but that was becasue we had 9 people in a hotel room the size of a very small living room lol. but once the others left and it was me and her and BM, MOH it was more relaxed and things went up hill from there.

miss.kayla · October 2009

my story is very much similar to yours. even my rehearsal dinner was a nightmare. I could go on and fill this post with lots that went wrong but, then I would be even more bummed about my wedding. Try to think about what went good, there may not be much but, you cant dwell on what went wrong.

Mrs.LKA · October 2009

My wedding was a mess (for me). It started the day before when we where setting up for the reception; no body would listen to what I was saying (where to put the tables and what nots) the rehearsal was a disaster. The next morning the girls and MIL were supposed to help finish setting up but only my mom showed up. So the 2 of us spent all morning getting the reception ready, so I was late to get ready for pictures. We made it to the church only 10 mins late; to find that my flowers were wrong (not even the right kind of flowers). My photographers were great and got me calmed down and helped me finish getting ready. When the guys got to the church most of them were craby; (both bridesmaids were 1 hr late for pictures because they didn't think they needed to be there when I told them to) about 1 hour into the pictures, one of the guys brought out cigars, which I am allergic to, that started a fight between DH and GM. I still feel sad about my wedding; I am very happy about being married to DH. I try to think about the couple of happy moments from the day.

Shleigh02 · October 2009

Im so sorry you didn't have a great time on your wedding day! Like the other posters have said, try to think of what you did like about your wedding day. However, if that doesn't work, lighten up on your self! Think of how crazy/funny/original this is going to be in a year! Can you imagine your DH and you sitting down for an anniversary dinner and laughing about how horrible everything was! That's what you shoot for - your relationship with DH. I think we are bombarded w/these perfect images of our perfect wedding day and how it is supposed to be so happy and wonderful and, well, perfect...and most of the time it's not at all! It's stressfull and families fight w/each other because everyone is feeling stressed because this day is supposed to be perfect! Let yourself relax about it and let it go. Think of how wonderful your time was on your honeymoon and how great life is going to be now that you passed the 'wedding test' and made it through. Surviving your wedding without a divorce is a bigger challenge that people think!!

jnc5000 · November 2009

I'm sorry to hear that your wedding didn't turn out as you had hoped. Mine was full of little flaws too. The caterer ordered bright royal blue table cloths instead of navy. I wanted white and yellow flowers, and ended up with white, some yellow, peach and a really weird yellow-orange color. The others were definitely not yellow! My cake was so far from what I had asked for. It was supposed to have a slight PSU theme which meant a white cake, navy ribbon icing spereating the layers and navy flowers. I got an all white cake with small candy paw prints. Oh well, I don't think any of the guests noticed anything. Plus, that morning, we found a really sick little kitten. I had to delay getting ready because I had to take her to the vet to be put down.

I think all wedding are bound to have little things go wrong, but I hope you can look back on the positive moments and try to remember them.

nutmeg0286 · November 2009

"Shoot for memories, not perfection" is what we say. So your bridesmaid fainted....go to youtube and type in "fainting at wedding" and you'll see she's not the only one! One day you'll look back on it and laugh. Even if you think it went horrible, look at it this way. You married the love of your life that day. That in itself was wonderful. Don't cry over it. You are now married. That's what the day is about. Not trying to have this "perfect" day. I mean, everyones definition of perfect is different. For me, it's making TONS of memories that day and having a blast. If things go "wrong" well that's just one more memory to have. And we will look back and laugh together

detailqueen · December 2009

It sucks that the day you dreamed would be fairy-tale didn't live up to expectations. And I'm really sorry about that. I am a wedding coordinator, all about everything going perfectly, so I can truly, viscerally feel your pain. But I know an officiant who says to every couple during the ceremony, "I truly hope that this is the worst day of the rest of your lives." Which raises some eyebrows, but his point of course is that while the wedding day is built up as the huge thing to look forward to, what it's really all about is the MARRIAGE. You want every day to get better and better. In that light, my advice would be to write off the negative experience and look to your wonderful new husband as evidence of what is really important. Because wouldn't you hate for it to be the other way around?

Dani0203 · May 2010

I didn't either. I made the mistake of letting my in law's pay for it (they offered, in fact, were genuinely pissed when we suggested no wedding sicne we couldn't afford one ourselves). but the wedding wasn't mine. every idea i had they laughed at or ignored. she would called me up and tell me what she had done/ordered/planned. i just posted a longer thing about the details, so i don't really want to get into them again. But there was a lot of manuipulation, a lot of controlling, and it was a miserable experience from the very first day of engagament. I love my husband, and i'm happy that we're married. but the wedding thing was awful and i am so glad it's over with.

Anyone not enjoy their wedding?

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