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help!

DaraKDaraK
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in New York-Hudson Valley
Has anyone else had the problem of not being able to make up their mind about ANYTHING about their wedding?  I seriously have 9 months left till my planned wedding and I am second guessing my ceremony/reception hall (The Full Moon Resort) and rethinking the dress I already put a deposit on.  I keep going back and forth with looking at another facility with nicer accommodations (the cabins at the full moon resort dont have bathrooms for each room, some people will have to share), and something a little higher scale.  I haven't signed a contract yet with the Full Moon and have put a hold on our wedding day for $250.  Does anyone have any other ideas for reception places?  My budget is $18,000 and if anyone has advice or has/is going through the same thing it would be nice to hear some advice. 
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Re: help!

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    mockninemocknine member
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    edited December 2011
    I don't have any help with reception places (I am better if you tell me how much you are looking to spend per person and the area you are looking in), but I did want to tell you that you are not alone in being so indecisive....  I purchased 3 dresses!!!!  

    I think we want everything to be just right, that we are almost afraid to make a final decision because, well, it's final!  My advice is to just go with your gut.  Don't think about it after and definitely stop looking!  No matter what we are talking about- photographer, dress, venue, whatever.  Pick it, pay for it, and move on to the next item.  In the end, it will all come together and you will be so happy!

    Hang in there!! :)
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    CrysMarie12CrysMarie12 member
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    edited December 2011
    The venue is so important, if you're not 100% happy with it...keep looking! I'm venue hunting now and we've gone to 12 different places so far. It's tough...but when we make the final decision I know I'll be completely happy with it because I've researched everywhere else. Good luck!
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    DaraKDaraK
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    edited December 2011
    Thanks so much for the advice! I think that's EXACTLY what I'm going through.  Once you make a decision it's final, and I'm definitely getting caught up in wanting to make everything perfect and make everyone happy.  And oh my goodness, three dresses?!  I hope you were able to sell the ones you didnt use.  I'm planning on looking one more time for dresses and if I find something I like more I'm just going to buy my original dress (otherwise I'd lose the deposit) and then sell it online.   My current venue is charging $75 a head, but not everything is included (there are a lot of little extra's they charge for). I'm planning on spending roughly $12,000 for the venue overall if that helps more, and I'm hoping that everything will be included if I go somewhere else.  Thanks so much again for the advice, and it's nice to know I'm not the only bride that is so indecisive Smile.
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    TerriandJoeTerriandJoe
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    edited December 2011
    You still have time. If you are doubting any of your vendors at all... you might want to take the time now to see if there is a venue and / or dress that you LOVE. Yeah, losing your deposits might be a bit annoying - but trust me it is much better to be happy with the big decisions regarding your wedding!

    12K for a venue seems like you would have a lot of options - but I'm not sure how many people you are hoping to have for that amount.

    You still have time to get out of your holds if that's what you want to do. Once you sign, you may be stuck. So make sure you (and FI) are happy with venue and that you love your dress!

    (What type of place are you looking at for a venue? And where in the hudson valley?)
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    DaraKDaraK
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    edited December 2011
    We're thinking that we'll have somewhere around 140 guests (going to finalize the guest list this month).  I'm also hoping to have our reception in an outside tent, and really not looking at a huge banquet hall.  I'd love to get married on an old estate on the Hudson, a vineyard, or on a private property with a great view of the mountains or Hudson River.  Overall, I'm looking for a place that has a more intimate feel where people can feel relaxed but also classy.
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    DaraKDaraK
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    edited December 2011

    I'm from Kingston so I'd like to have the wedding probably no more than 45-60 minutes away.  Thanks for all the encouragement!

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    NevenagNevenag
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    edited December 2011

    Change the dress I would say. I bought mine in a hurry, I was annoyed and frustrated and just ordered the one I had on. I went for my fitting and I didn't like it. I mean I hate it, and I tried for a few days to find a new dress. But I was stressing even more, and then a guilt set in about paying for another dress, plus I was running of time .... (I had only a month before the wedding when my fittings started.)blah, blah, blah... long story short, it's the week of my wedding and I am thinking I should go to David Bridal grab a dress of a hanger and go with that. I am so unhappy with my dress, the more time goes by the more unhappy I get. And believe me I am not a girly girl, and the dress I thought was not very important to me, and I am kicking my self for ordering this one, but I am even more annoyed at myself for not trying to find another dress after I realized I don't really like this one. 
    As far as the venue, I recommend the Garrison, I am getting married there this weekend. Their prices are not too bad, and everything is included in the per person price. And they are willing to work with you. I think that for 140 people you could fit in your budget. 
    Let me know I can send you their menus.  

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