Community› Local Wedding Boards› Florida-South Florida
Florida-South Florida
New Discussion
Options

question about inviting kids(kinda long sorry)

quiggels219quiggels219
First Comment
in Florida-South Florida
My FI and I are making a general invite list so we know how many people we have to help us choose a venue.  I have 9 neices and nephews (I'm the baby of a family of 4), so obviously children will be invitied.  We are planning on having a children's table with a different menu for them with activities at the table. 
Now heres the question:  My FI was going over theinvite  list with his mom today and she saw we were planning on inviting 2 sets of my family friends and their children (2 kids each for an extra total of 4 kids).  After talking to her, my FI thinks we should not invite the children of friends and only invite children that are family.  I think it is completely rude to invite someone without their young children unless we are doing a no children allowed wedding.  I couldn't imagine these people showing up, seeing lots of kids running around and knowing theirs were not invitied. I feel like the parents will be offended. Anyways I told him I'd post this here and we can see if other people think it is rude or not and use that to help make our final decision.  Thanks!
BabyFruit Ticker
Report Reply to Post

Re: question about inviting kids(kinda long sorry)

  • Options
    jnj111410jnj111410
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    are your neices and nephews part of the bridal party?
    Photobucket My Bio imageDaisypath Anniversary tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    CandisHCandisH
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    children in the family are different.  It's up to you.  I'm doing adult only reception, however the children IN the wedding, related to us or not, are allowed at the reception.
    Photobucket
    Report Reply
  • Options
    jcaruncho2010jcaruncho2010
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    This is a completely uninformed opinion...I barely have any knowledge of etiquette rules and whatnot so my opinion is a personal one and some people might not agree.  But the way I see it, if I were invited to a friend's wedding and was told that children weren't allowed, and I showed up and there were children from the bridal party or the bride/groom's families' children running around, I would not get offended. The way I see it, family IS the exception.  Either way, as someone's friend I would completely understand the cost that inviting everyone's children would entail and I would comprehend if I weren't allowed to bring mine.  And honestly, as a guest I'd want to be able to go to your wedding, drink some wine and dance the night away, without having to worry about my rugrats running around and getting themselves into trouble, so I really wouldn't mind one bit. 
    image
    Report Reply
  • Options
    ohyouhavemyheartohyouhavemyheart
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    ditto janet!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    RU3234RU3234
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with Janet...we only invited 1 kid. Hes my ring bearer and my brothers son. We got some crap about Fis second cousin not being invited but after we explained, every one understood.
    New and Updated Bio Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Report Reply
  • Options
    LAKE21LAKE21 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't agree with the general opinion. In my opinion, I would invite the other 4 kids. It's only 4 extra kids and the parents may surprise you and leave them with a sitter anyways. Even though Janet makes an excellent point, I feel that if you allow some, you should allow all. There shouldn't be any stipulation between whose kids matter more.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    quiggels219quiggels219
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    Thanks for the advice everyone! Still don't know what we will do but we have a long time to decide :)

    BabyFruit Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    gatorgirl512gatorgirl512
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think that if there are other people that you want to invite more but can't due to budget/size restrictions, you don't have to invite the extra kids. If they question it, you can just be honest and say that you didn't have the space for them. I don't think you should use the whole "family kids only" rule if it's not the reason to exclude them.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    CandisHCandisH
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would think that a lot of parents would love to come without their kids!  What parents don't love a free night every once in a while?
    Photobucket
    Report Reply
  • Options
    RachAisleRachAisle member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It is a good question! My plan is this: Kids of Wedding Party who are also OOT only, with an exception for the 3 overseas families (none of which have rsvp'd yes yet).

    I mean it's a wedding. We aren't made of money and there's a sh*tload of stuff that people can potentially get upset over. You've got to draw the line somewhere.

    I would say if someone pushes to bring their kids and it's over the line you've drawn, ask them to contribute toward the babysitting/food costs.

    Good luck!
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Jeni10cscJeni10csc member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Well I agree with Janet. 100%. My case: I have 6 kids in my bridal party and I have an ADULTS ONLY wedding - not even the ones in the bridal party. So when I discussed this with the parents of the kids in the bridal party, NONE of the parents want their kids at the reception. They had ALL made arrangements for their kids to be picked up at the church. Anyway, I think no one should be offended by whatever you decide. It's your wedding, your money, and your day. that's my humble opinion.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    twinkle82576twinkle82576 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm having an adults only wedding. No children in the ceremony or reception. However, I think if you're going to allow some children to attend, you should allow them all to attend. Like someone else said, the parents might not even take the kids. I know I wouldn't take mine. GL!
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards