Hi ladies, I just need to vent to you...
My MOH V, and I met about 6 years ago. We travelled to Europe together and used to spend tons of time together. When I started dating FI, we didn't see eachother as often. Partly because I was spending a lot of time with him but also because she moved into an apartment with her college friends a little further away from me. She never really seemed to like FI as much as she liked my x (wow for the past 2 years I have kept that in my head and I've never said it out loud before). I can just tell the way she treats him is not the same and I feel like she avoids having to spend time with him. He tries with her but she just doesn't give anything back his way. The only times she comes to our apartment is if I've mentioned that he will be out with his friends.
Anyway, we don't hang out very often anymore, but she is literally like family to me. We have had many discussions about how we don't see each other as often as we used to but that we still consider each other like family and know we will always be there in a second for each other. There was no one else I would have imagined to ask besides her to be my MOH.
In addition to V, I have 5 more BMs-- 2 are good friends, 1 is my sister in law, and 2 are cousins (19 and 16).
So even though I have always felt that there is no relationship between her and my FI, I still expected her to be happy and there for me in all of this, but no. All of my bridesmaids have been super excited for me and ask me questions about planning and such. She actually didn't even seem that excited for me when I called to tell her I was engaged... When we were planning our e-party, I gave her dates to choose from to make sure she would be available. She helped me choose the date and then recently told me "oops, I forgot I might have to travel for work that weekend". They even all have gotten me a little gift, except for V.
Now I am NOT writing this post just because V didn't give me a gift. I'm writing it to mostly vent that I'm hurt at how uninvolved and uninterested she is.
When people have asked me how planning is going and if V is helping me with things, I am constantly making excuses for why she is not involved, like saying she works really long hours and is so busy. She was in her roomates wedding recently and seemed so happy for her, and I don't feel that happiness towards me at all!
I spoke with my sister in law about how I'm not only hurt, but I feel like I'm missing a huge part of my wedding planning by not having a MOH by my side at all, for anything. She promised that she will make sure that things are taken care of, even if she has to step in, which is amazing of her. I just feel so jealous of girls who have MOH's that want to be part of things.. I would literally be thrilled if she asked me ONCE about ANYTHING.
I'm just so hurt and I don't know if it's worth mentioning to her or if I need to just keep it to myself and plan my wedding with my mom and other bridesmaids and just let her show up when she feels like it. I've been trying not to push her into things and I don't want to come off like a brat and that she should make my wedding the center of her universe or anything like that, I'm just so sad that she doesn't seem interested in any detail of my wedding. Part of me wants to ask her why, but the other part of me is scared to hear what she might say..