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Help please!?!

Bugzy326Bugzy326 member
First Comment
in Missouri-Kansas City
I am facing the hardest decision with the wedding thus far...
My FI and I do not want to see each other before the ceremony...Ive been that way since I was a little girl actually! There is something so magical to me with the anticipation of not seeing each other all day and then that one moment when the doors open. BUT, we are having an evening ceremony 6:30 pm on 3/3/2012, which is before day light savings meaning it will be dark by then. This means are only pictures together outside will be dark with a city type feel (location downtown KC). I am a recent photography learner and appreciate amazing photos greatly...I know that the BEST photos are taken outside with natural sun light. We have amazing photographers and I dont doubt them at all, but natural light along with with bright colors of outside make a great photo.
I cannot move the ceremony time back...so I am going to have to settle for either seeing each other before the wedding and getting my outside photos while its light, OR, not seeing each other, and having only night time photos of us together on the big day.
ANY advice please!? I am over whelmed with this decision!! Thx!!
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Re: Help please!?!

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    LisaC0617LisaC0617
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    FWIW, my FI and I are doing a first look. We don't have the daylight constraints that you do, but I wanted to keep the cocktail hour after the ceremony to one hour and I wanted to spend a little time with my FI on our wedding day. This way, there aren't many people around, and we can take in the moment together (plus, we can be sure to capture his excitement of seeing me!) 
    I do think it may take away from him seeing me walk down the aisle, although he says it won't. The more I think about it though, the more I'm glad we are doing it because it takes a lot of pressure off the walk down as well.
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    andersonimagesandersonimages
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    edited December 2011
    Have you thought about taking pictures the next day or maybe a week later?
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    mikkiwin8mikkiwin8 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am the same as you, there is no way he is gonna see me before I walk down the aisle. I think that is one of the biggest things I am looking forward to. It sounds like it is really important to you too so I agree with PP, maybe you can get back in your dress and take pics again the next day. That way you can take your time and not lose out on his reaction while standing at the altar.
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    jenajjthrjenajjthr member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    If you really want the daylight pics you don't have much choice.  Do first look pics or redo the pics a later date.  Redoing the pics at a later date probably means more money in terms of extra photographer fees and rental tux fees. 

    I too had my heart set on the first look as I walked down the aisle, and maybe you saw how romantic it was when William did it for Kate.  I think it's every girls dream.  When we talked to the photographer we discussed both scenarios.  He told us the pros and cons of each way to go, which he preferred, and showed pics of each type. 

    Pros of first look...time before the wedding so you don't lose time after the wedding, no feeling rushed to get the pics done so you can get to the reception, makeup and flowers look awesome because it's in the beginning of the day, no long delay between the wedding and reception, a still magical moment of him seeing you for the first time. 

    Cons...a long day since you have to start earlier, he sees you before you walk down the aisle, a long day in your dress,

    Pros of church....your "dream", no funny shots of random people stopping to watch you, no potential stains on the dress

    Con's of church...photographer isn't free to move around as much to get the perfect shot, lots of staged photos with forced smiles,  sad looking flowers, hair, etc, due to the length of the day, and so on..

    In the end you have to decide what you want more...the awesome photographs or the first look coming down the aisle. 
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    Bugzy326Bugzy326 member
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    edited December 2011
    Jen- thank you!! What did you end up choosing and are you happy you chose it??
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    kelleyku05kelleyku05 member
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    edited December 2011
    We saw each other before hand....but do to the weather ended up taking most of our pictures inside, even though I was hoping for outdoor pics.  They turned out great and we had some fun options inside!  I had the same dilemma while planning.  We had a 7 o'clock wedding and didn't want to spend all our time after taking pics, so we broke down and did a "first look" before the ceremony.  I'm glad I did because I got all my crying out then!

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    jenajjthrjenajjthr member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I'm doing the first look before the ceremony.  My photographer takes some great first look pics that are to die for, various angles (two photographers), close ups, natural looking.  If it was just in the church they only angle they would get is straight on of my FI.  They won't be able to get me seeing his first look.   

    I also hate my picture taken and couldn't stand the look of all the "traditional" pics of people standing up all formal and stiff for the camera.  These will be outside, more candid, and more "me"  I also liked the fact that I will have time to fix my makeup before walking down the aisle, won't cry as much walking down the aisle, won't be stressed about getting pics done after the ceremony (I'm a type A personality...I will be stressing enough as it is), I won't have to miss cocktail hour, the pro's of a First Look outweighed everything else.  I'm gonna get beautiful pics and that is what is most important to me. 
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    Bugzy326Bugzy326 member
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    edited December 2011
    thanks!
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    MLC613MLC613
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We did not see each other before and I am SO glad we didn't. I can totally see why someone would, but we just didn't take any pictures outside except for the bubbles walking out of the church. I think you should just ask yourself is it more important to se each other before and take pictures outside, OR not see each other before and probably not take any shots outside. If you do decide to see each other before, i have seen some super cute pictures of peoples "first looks" it's probably because a bunch of people aren't looking at you when you have your "first look" if you wait until you're walking down the aisle like we did. Congrats and good luck!! It will be the best day of your life!!


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    bechiginbothombechiginbothom member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are in the same boat...and really even if we were OK with seeing each other before, my wedding is in July and no way do i want outdoor photos prior.  My dress will be dirty and I will be a hot mess!!!
    I had a photographer offer to do another photo shoot on some day after our wedding, but get all dressed up like it was our wedding day.  I didn't like that idea...so as a comprimise we are going to have more engagement photos taken to incorporate the outdoor spots that we want.
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    prideeinpynkprideeinpynk member
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    edited December 2011
    Well, I'm an old married lady now (8 months), but I decided to check out the boards a bit. ;)

    We did a first look before the ceremony, and it was such a good decision I think. It was a beautiful day out, we all rode around in the trolley we had rented and took pictures at various locations (a rose garden near the Plaza and the war memorial near union hill). It felt nice to get it done and be able to enjoy all of our party, rather than fuss with pictures after the ceremony. Plus, we got to hang out together and relieve some of the stress of the day, which was 100% worth it.

    IMHO, it didn't make anything about the first time we saw each other on our wedding day any less special. It was still our wedding day regardless of when we saw each other! And my heart still fluttered when I saw him standing at the front of the aisle. :)

    Chrissy & David -- 10/10/10

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