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what not to wear?

Alice and LesAlice and Les
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in Military Brides
So FI and I are starting to finalize our wedding party. We have a mixed wedding party. There are 3 Marines, a college friend and 1 minister in our wedding. Since not everyone will be wearing a military uniform, we thought about asking them all to wear tuxs.  We think it would look bad in pictures if some wore their uniform and others were in tuxs. So we are planning to ask them  not wear their uniform. We are prepared to pay for the tuxs if money is an issue, but I am worried about offending them? Any Thoughts?
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Re: what not to wear?

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    duggan12duggan12 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am doing the same thing fi is wearing his but we asked the groomsmen to wear tuxes fo they all look the same. None of them had a problem with it. I think offering to pay for the tux is very nice.
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    MeepWeddingMeepWedding
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    edited December 2011
    I think if you tell them to not wear their mess dress/ equivalent, then you should probably offer to pay for their tuxes.  They had to pay a chunk of change for the mess dress in the first place and it's nice to not have to worry about needing to rent a tux.

    However, it really doesn't look bad in pictures, in my opinion, to have a mixed mil-civilian bridal party.  I think it's great that they can proudly show their service at a nice event like a wedding.
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    kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I think mixed bridal parties look awesome. My MOH is wearing her Mess dress and my BMs are wearing navy blue dresses of their choice. FI is wearing MC Blues, there's an AF groomsman, a Soldier, and two civilians. I'm psyched!
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    shan87shan87
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I also don't think it looks bad, they are meant to stand out.. however its my experience that not all of them love to wear theirs. I would talk to them about it, see if they are set on wearing it or if they hate wearing it. In the end 9xs out of 10 they will wear whatever you and your FI decide.
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    greygarnettgreygarnett member
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    edited December 2011

    My FI side of the WP is himself and 3 groomsmen in the military and 1 not, so to not make him look like the total odd man out (my girls all match), we asked all the guys other than my FI to wear tuxes. None of them had any issue and even went ahead and paid for their own, they had no problem with it. His BM even said "I don't care what I wear to stand up there with you guys, I'd wear a chicken suit if you asked me". Just talk to them about it and see how they feel, offering to pay isn't a bad idea tho.

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    Avion22Avion22 member
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_not-wear?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:5b73c28c-4b92-489f-b835-b11413b83d85Post:2b95c5b6-c76a-40f8-ba39-ef638751eca3">Re: what not to wear?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think mixed bridal parties look awesome. My MOH is wearing her Mess dress and my BMs are wearing navy blue dresses of their choice. FI is wearing MC Blues, there's an AF groomsman, a Soldier, and two civilians. I'm psyched!
    Posted by WishIcouldbeinthe'stan[/QUOTE]


    Wow, if anyone asked me to wear my mess dress instead of a bridesmaid dress I think I would laugh out loud:-)  Though, I guess it would mean not having to buy a dress I'll never wear again.  But at least dresses make me feel like a girl....my mess dress makes me feel like a dude with long hair.
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    Sammy0709Sammy0709 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_not-wear?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:5b73c28c-4b92-489f-b835-b11413b83d85Post:3f4648ff-d845-41cb-8a03-d14f31fd4823">Re: what not to wear?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: what not to wear? : Wow, if anyone asked me to wear my mess dress instead of a bridesmaid dress I think I would laugh out loud:-)  Though, I guess it would mean not having to buy a dress I'll never wear again.  But at least dresses make me feel like a girl....my mess dress makes me feel like a dude with long hair.
    Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

    If I remember correctly, and I think I do because I know who Stan's MOH is, she wanted to wear her mess dress.  So, to each their own.
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    kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_not-wear?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:13Discussion:5b73c28c-4b92-489f-b835-b11413b83d85Post:ac9c9796-1472-4bcb-89fe-3463910620eb">Re: what not to wear?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: what not to wear? : If I remember correctly, and I think I do because I know who Stan's MOH is, she wanted to wear her mess dress.  So, to each their own.
    Posted by Sammy0709[/QUOTE]

    <div>Yes, she wanted to and I wanted her too.  I can't imagine having everyone in uniform except her. How weird! I asked her if she wanted to change into a dress at the reception, and she passed. The male service members aren't changing, so neither is she. I love her, she's such a motivator.</div><div>
    </div><div><img src="http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c376/AlwaysALiberal/MN2/John_Basilone_wedding.jpg" alt="" /></div><div>
    </div><div>See those shorter white dresses? Those are the WWII female seersucker uniform. I dig it, and not just because it's John and Lena Basilone's wedding.</div>
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    Sammy0709Sammy0709 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_not-wear?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:5b73c28c-4b92-489f-b835-b11413b83d85Post:c62cd304-8524-4cc7-a273-5b481aff0c40">Re: what not to wear?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: what not to wear? : Yes, she wanted to and I wanted her too.  I can't imagine having everyone in uniform except her. How weird! I asked her if she wanted to change into a dress at the reception, and she passed. The male service members aren't changing, so neither is she. I love her, <strong>she's such a motivator.</strong> See those shorter white dresses? Those are the WWII female seersucker uniform. I dig it, and not just because it's John and Lena Basilone's wedding.
    Posted by WishIcouldbeinthe'stan[/QUOTE]

    I can tell.  That's why I figured she wanted to wear the uniform.  I really like the old female uniforms.  The recruiting office where I went to apply to be an NFO or aviator had an officer doing RAP duty that wore the khaki dress.  It's very similar to those.  I loved it lol.
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