Second Weddings
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This board is S-L-O-W

So, let's start a conversation.  Anybody got something controversial they can talk about? 

image Don't mess with the old dogs; age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.

Re: This board is S-L-O-W

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    edited December 2011

    No kiding, and I'm so bored today!!

    Some topics I've posted elsewhere, but not controversial exactly:

    1 - My FI and I are about to announce our engagement before he's met my dad. Guidance?

    2 - And a question from another board, is my dress really too "clingy"?

    http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_thoughts-dress


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    ski2playski2play member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011

    Nothing here, also bored....this day is dragging.  Ugh!

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    ski2playski2play member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh yeah, and I do not think the dress is too clingy.  She has the body for it so she should go for it. 

    Also, mf, what does your first question say?  It got cut off.  Is it asking for guidance if you should announce your engagement prior to telling your??? 
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    edited December 2011
    I'm concerned how to address the reaction of "Hey dad, I know you haven't met my boyfriend, but we're getting marrrrrrieeeeed!"
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    MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh mfeo do your parents live out of state?  My XH didn't meet my parents until after we were married... I lived out of state and they were invited to the wedding but declined to come... 
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    edited December 2011
    Um, yes I have a question.  Perhaps you ladies could help me.  My husband and I just got married last week at the JOP.  I am so bummed I didn't get to wear  a big white poofy dress and shove cake in his face.  So, what do you think about us having a second wedding on our first anniversary.  I am thinking maybe 250 of our closest friends and maybe I can buy a Pnina gown.  And maybe we can get a lot of gifts.

    So, whatcha think?  

    LOL  Totally kidding.
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    edited December 2011
    Gonna -- You had me,  the burn was starting.... good one.


    So how's this -  If you were elected Queen  of the Knot, what 3 changes would you make?  However, you cannot change the posters, only the actual structure and function of the website.  (so you don't have the power to make everyone thick skinned or to require puppies and rainbows to be blown up the assembled's butts) 
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    Ollie08Ollie08 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It's really bothered me that this board is so slow because you guys are so awesome, but at the same time I have nothing good to post.

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_this-board-s-l-o-w?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:35Discussion:6f0c1864-9466-437b-848d-a8702c0c75d7Post:1fe2a42d-d548-4356-93d3-d7ac361143d0">Re: This board is S-L-O-W</a>:
    [QUOTE]Gonna -- You had me,  the burn was starting.... good one. So how's this -  <strong>If you were elected Queen  of the Knot, what 3 changes would you make?</strong>  However, you cannot change the posters, only the actual structure and function of the website.  (so you don't have the power to make everyone thick skinned or to require puppies and rainbows to be blown up the assembled's butts) 
    Posted by right1thistime[/QUOTE]
    1- I would change the heading/intro to the NEY board so it stopped encouraging pre-planning of a wedding before an engagement.

    2- I would change the "bio"s back to their old blank HTML format so you could completely customize them without having to make a weebly page.

    3- Hmm IDK, I'll think of something and come back and edit it. Actually I think I would restric the size of signatures. I've seen posters that have signatures that are longer than the page and you constantly have to scroll past them. I get that you're in love with whatever you've got there, but one small picture would suffice.

    Daisypath Anniversary tickers

    image
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    edited December 2011
    1. I would REQUIRE a tutorial on wise posting, things like lurk before you post, international vs local boards, don't post personal details, etc. 

    2.  I would allow you to quote a portion of a post rather than quoting it all and editing it.

    3.  I would stop the periodic bounce to the nest because i am already married.  I KNOW I am not planning a wedding, fool. 
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    handfast4mehandfast4me member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That's good Donna!!!  A tutorial is a great idea.  A grammar tutorial would be good too.  OMG.  There was a post on the nest the other day that nearly killed me.  Not a verb and subject agreement in a WALL OF TEXT.  

    I might have rotating moderators.  So, the moderator on NEY gets to come here for a while, and vice versa.  It seems to me that although I know retread goes to some of hte other boards (I see her posts) none of the other moderators know WTF is going on here.   I've seen quite a few posts on other boards from women who have divorced, and it would be nice if the moderator would say: You may also wish to post on Second Weddings.  

    Oh and one more thing. I would make all the language consistent  throughout TK.  If you see at the top right hand side, it says "community" but when you're on some other places in TK it says "Chat."    I've noticed a bunch of inconsistencies like that.   At my place of employment, we would get raked over the coals for something like that.   
    image Don't mess with the old dogs; age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.
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    Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    edited December 2011
    "I've seen quite a few posts on other boards from women who have divorced, and it would be nice if the moderator would say: You may also wish to post on Second Weddings.  "

    I totally agree with the above. Whenever (not often now) I've been on other boards and read posts by a previously married person, I'd refer them here.

    And I also agree it's been sort of dead around here. Everyone is off having a real life I guess, LOL.

    Nothing very controversial to post, but I am getting excited about my wedding in 8 days. My best friend arrived last night from Maine (one of my BM). We sat up until 11:30 (horrors, on a work night!) chatting and downing Leinenkugel Summer Shandys. Showed her all my DIY wedding "stuff". I think my excitement level about having her here for 10 days is almost as much as it is for the wedding! Haven't seen her in at about five years, so it's going to be great.

    Do any of you have a friend that fits "just so" into your life from the minute you meet them? I've known her for over 32 years, met her when I was working in Massachusetts back then and we became fast friends and have been that way in spite of the fact I moved back to Michigan in 1982. I was her MOH when she got married 20 years ago, and my 4 year old son was her ring bearer at her 4th of July wedding in Maine. We can go weeks without chatting, but just pick up where we left off when we do talk again.

    As for being queen of the knot, I do think a tutorial would be great. They should make you watch it BEFORE you make a knot "name", telling you to not use your email address or real name, etc. It should also do a walkthrough of all the boards and the primary "purpose" of them.
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    edited December 2011
    oh my Sue - only 8 more days!  That's awesome! 

    3 things I would change -

    1. I would add a "like" function.  So many times threads (on E and SB in particular) get huge because they all have to post a "THIS" or "Ditto"... If there was a like button maybe folks would just hit that instead of typing the exact same responses...

    2. I would move many of the boards OUT of "Special Topics", I mean I would think that "Attire" is more a special topic than a second wedding.  Attire is aimed at only one aspect of the planning - but Second Weddings covers ALL of it - YKWIM?

    3. Add the "View" count that the nest has.  Look if there are only 2 posts but 100 people have viewed it?  I'm confident I don't need to bother with it.  It might help prioritze MY knotting.  (especially since I've had such limited time to do it lately)

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    handfast4mehandfast4me member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    And, MFEO:  your dress is NOT too clingy.  You look lovely.  What jewelry are you gonna wear? 
    image Don't mess with the old dogs; age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.
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    ebuchanan89ebuchanan89 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't have any suggestions on changes, but how about a little controversy? 

    Someone on the Vegas board was looking for suggestions for a venue for just the two of them.  In a nutshell, she didn't want the headache of planning a wedding and is going to elope in December, and then have a reception at home at a later date.  Immediately, a few people started in on her about how it was rude to not invite people to the wedding, but then invite them to a party later - accusing her of using it as a gift grabbing opportunity.  Some also tried to convince her that she should invite people because it was really not that difficult (in their opinion), and that they personally would be offended if they were invited to the at home party, but not the wedding itself.  Some even argued that her reasons for wanting to elope were not valid reasons (at least that was my take on it).

    What do you guys think?  Is it rude to have a party after eloping to Vegas?  Would you think that the sole purpose of a party is to get gifts, or is it to celebrate a marriage?  Would you go to the party?
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    handfast4mehandfast4me member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    For that party, that's what Todd and I were planning originally.  Here's the thing.  We wanted to say and perform traditions that not a lot of muggles would understand.  (We're pagan.)  Todd is an extreme introvert, and even without the religious thing, he would have been TERRIFIED to be in front of a crowd.  Having been married once before, I knew that I wanted an intimate ceremony.  I don't think it's gift grabby, it's celebrating the marriage.  People are not REQUIRED to bring gifts.  Most do, but that's because they're happy for the couple, and love them.

    My daughter did something similar, she was married at the JOP, and then a month later we had an at home reception.  Not everyone brought gifts, and we just did it to celebrate their union. 

    I hate that so many people think that there's only one, right, way to do things.  Drives me nuts. 

    The poster you refer to should just tell everyone that in Pagan tradition, if they want to come to the ceremony, they gotta do it skyclad.  HA!!!! 
    image Don't mess with the old dogs; age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.
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