Moms and Maids

How many bridesmaids?

Re: How many bridesmaids?

  • handfast4mehandfast4me member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think there are "rules" for this anymore, but I'm thinking that if you have more women standing up with you than those seated, that's too many.  Here was the "rule" when I was growing up, as I recall it (of course, I'm 50 now, so when I got married the first time when dinosaurs roamed the earth, things were different, and I may not be remembering this entirely correctly):  You need an "usher/groomsman" (they were the same in my area) for every 25 guests.  And in those days, the sides had to be even, so you would have one bridesmaid escorted by each groomsman/usher.  

    So here's what I'd do: invite the women that have meant the most, and who have supported you.  But don't ask them too far out; there are stories all over these boards about brides wanting to un-invite their bridesmaids.   I had only my sisters when I got married the first time.  The women who asked me if they could help in any way, my close friends at the time, well, heck, I don't even remember their names anymore.  That's life-people come in and out of it. 
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  • edited December 2011
    The rule I've heard was 1 bridesmaid for every 50 guests.  That being said, if you're inviting 500 people do you really want to deal with finding dresses for 10 girls?  Or go the other way, do you want to have 10 girls standing up for you at a wedding if 75 people?

    Pick the people you couldn't bear to get married without - the people you called MINUTES after you got engaged.  Those people are your attendants.  As a bride currently planning herself, I have my MOH and 3 bms, and I wouldn't want any more than that.
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  • edited December 2011
    I think it is a gracious way to say that his family is important to you.  My daughter had her FI sister, even though she did not contribute much, it meant a lot to his family.  That being said, you don't have to have ALL of them.  My husband had 4 sisters...I picked one of them...at the time, there was one who was close to my age and unmarried, so easy choice.  You will be related to these people for a really long time!
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  • edited December 2011
    There's no rules. I would've liked 3-4 but I now have 6 because FI wanted more groomsmen and there were that many girls I liked to ask. Today he told me I might need a 7th but I said NO WAY! We are hopefully only having 100 guests.
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  • kls114kls114 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_grooms-sisters-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e40d42ce-17dc-4aa0-8256-cb6ac225a997Post:1c86d955-b8b2-48c2-9731-77d35616fb66">Re: How many bridesmaids?</a>:
    [QUOTE]The rule I've heard was 1 bridesmaid for every 50 guests.  That being said, if you're inviting 500 people do you really want to deal with finding dresses for 10 girls?  Or go the other way, do you want to have 10 girls standing up for you at a wedding if 75 people? Pick the people you couldn't bear to get married without - the people you called MINUTES after you got engaged.  Those people are your attendants.  As a bride currently planning herself, I have my MOH and 3 bms, and I wouldn't want any more than that.
    Posted by saisongbird[/QUOTE]

    Ditto. I always say those exact words...who are the people who you couldn't make it through the day without?Those would be the one you want to stand with you that day!
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  • edited December 2011
    No set amount...we were just going to do a MOH and Best Man but my FI was having hard time keeping his buddies out so I have my MOH and 3 BMs and my FI has BM and 5 GM. Don't have to be even. I could've picked a few other girls but for my sanity and to prevent drama I went with my 3 best girls and my FI's sister.
  • edited December 2011

    Ok, I'm one of those girls with 8 bridesmaids and yes, everyone gasps when they hear that but I'm happy with it.  They include 3 of my family (sister and 2 cousins), 3 best friends (2 college and 1 hs), and 2 of my FI family (little sister and niece both 17).  Each person is special to me in a different way and will only enhance the day of my wedding so I am not going to let someone tell me "the number" of people I can pick to share in this special day.  Bottom line, there is no number, follow your heart in who you care about and will support you now and in the future.

  • edited December 2011
    I agree with kgreely, I am having 7 (my sister, 3 from college, two from hs, and one from my work)  We started with five, then grew to six when a coworker was invaluable in the wedding planning, and I added a seventh after I found out a friend (that I wanted to ask, but had just lost a baby) would be thrilled.

    It's your day, it's all about having fun and being surrounded by those that care the most about you.  Do what makes you happy!
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