Wedding Party

Have to get rid of two bridesmaids!!!

So I HAVE to cut my bridal party down, but that means I have to tell two of my friends they are not in the wedding anymore. I feel kinda horrible. WHAT DO I SAY!?!?!?


~*~LEX~*~

Re: Have to get rid of two bridesmaids!!!

  • WTH?!  Why on earth would you "HAVE to cut" your bridal party down"?!
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
  • The bridal party is too big for the size wedding we're having. I also have more than my fiance; I want to even it up.
    ~*~LEX~*~
  • Then you say, "Numbers are more important to me than your friendship, so I'm sorry, but you just didn't make the cut.  Sorry, but I obviously love the people I'm keeping in my wedding party more than I do you."

    Because no matter how you phrase it, that's exactly what you're saying.

    Warning:  Expect your friendships to end over this.

    ------------------------------------

    Now... if you want to be reasonable, you'll recognize that even wedding parties are not required and not even preferable these days.  The point isn't how many humans are there and whether the whole thing is symmetrical, the point is that you want to honor those nearest and dearest to you.

    And once you've asked 'em, you can't UNask 'em without destroying relationships.  I speak truth.  Is it really worth it?  Really?
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
  • Yea. You're probably right. To be perfectly honest though, I originally didn't even have them in the wedding. I added them out of obligation a little bit. My gut was telling me not to do it, but I did it any way. Now that I want my small bridal party of really close friends, it's coming back to bite me in the butt. 
    ~*~LEX~*~
  • Yeah... asking people for the wrong reasons will do that.  But just leave them in and don't worry about it.  Just don't expect anything out of them - no help, no parties, no nothing.  Expect them to get the requisite dresses and show up to hold their flowers on the day of the wedding.  That way, if they do anything extra, it'll be a pleasant surprise.  If they don't, you can't be disappointed.

    You'll be fine, I promise.
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
  • I guess I'm just going to relax and let it go, don't worry about it, and enjoy my wedding. Thanks for the advice. You gave it to me straight; I appreciate it.
    ~*~LEX~*~
  • No problem.  Be sure to stick around.
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
  • OP stick around!   I commend you for accepting the advice given.
  • Good for you, OP, for not going crazy!
  • The other girls are right, uneven sides are fine ... and certainly not something worth ruining a friendship over (Which is a very big risk you take when you start "cutting" people).

    I'm really glad to see that you're just going to roll with things the way they are: good job!

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
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    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    member
    edited November 2010
    Oh I came in here expecting a hot mess... good job, OP, for seeing the situation, listening to the advice, and taking it straight.  Come around more often!! :-)
  • Wow OP, great job accepting the advice and following.  Many girls on here have had uneven WP and it was perfectly fine so don't even worry about it.  Its so great to actually see people accept the advice given and not put up a fight about it. 

    image BabyFruit Ticker
  • Aww, I was hoping for more drama...

    Seriously though, good for you, OP.  We ended up cutting our guest list down to about 40, and had 11 total attendants between us.  Turned out just fine. 
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • In Response to Re: Have to get rid of two bridesmaids!!!:
    I guess I'm just going to relax and let it go, don't worry about it, and enjoy my wedding. Thanks for the advice. You gave it to me straight; I appreciate it.
    Posted by lexi126
    Wonderful, OP!  We all go a little mad sometimes, and I commend you for listening to the advice and avoiding a big mistake.  You won't regret the decision.
    Courtesy of megk8oz
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
  • I am with the other girls here - great job at accepting the advice.  Sometimes it is really hard to accept advice and move on, especially when it is hard to hear. 

    Years ago I was one of those cut bridesmaids.  We had been friends in college and still regularly talked but she ended up having to add one of her husbands friends to the bridal party to keep his side of the family happy.  It really hurt because I had already ordered my dress and felt like I was being dumped.  I understood where she was coming from, but it still bugs me.
  • Thanks ladies. I feel better about it now. I think I lost my mind for a second; I'm going to pretend it didn't happen :)
    ~*~LEX~*~
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