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Bridesmaid Dresses - Appropriate?

Hi Everyone,  

I am going to be 43 on my wedding day, and it's a first marriage for both of us.  It will be a formal church wedding, with a country club reception (morning wedding, afternoon reception).  I am wearing a strapless long ivory dress (A-line) with lace and beading. 

I have 4 bridesmaids - one MOH (best friend), and 3 bridesmaids (all family).  They are all in their 40's, and 3 of them are plus-sized (apple shaped).  I won't give you all the details, but to keep it short, my MOH has body image issues, and has voiced many concerns since the beginning about pretty much every dress I suggested (ex. wouldn't wear a bolero jacket or wrap,wouldn't try on A-line or empire etc. etc. but didn't want sleeveless).  It was very limiting.  I really would have preferred to take her to a bridal shop and have the ladies help fit her, but she seemed so resistant to do so.  In the end, I allowed to her choose her own dress, just to make her happy and so that there could be some closure.

She ended up choosing the dress in the first link below.  Since they are separates, we took the other bridesmaids to the store to try different tops on, but once everyone got there, and saw the second dress, they really fell in love with it.  Now, all the BM's are in the 2nd dress (no sleeves, pencil skirt), and the MOH stuck with the jacket but switched to the pencil skirt.  

It was such a whirlwind at the store, that I agreed to it all, but am having such serious reservations about whether these dresses are appropriate to a formal wedding.  

Please offer advice if you can. (By the way, they will be Aubergine - a deep eggplant/ purple color in taffeta). October wedding.

http://www.alfredangelo.com/collections/productdisplay.aspx?productID=56e35bfa-0721-456a-97d5-109a2219fce0&categoryID=01192db8-bf9e-425c-a67c-e0e9484157ae&pg=1&colorId1=

http://www.alfredangelo.com/collections/productdisplay.aspx?productID=e62dff11-7be2-4131-9a54-2c2116a4b0fa&categoryID=01192db8-bf9e-425c-a67c-e0e9484157ae&pg=1&colorId1

Re: Bridesmaid Dresses - Appropriate?

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    Oops - here's the MOH dress (but imagine it with a pencil skirt)

    56e35bfa-0721-456a-97d5-109a2219fce0&categoryID=01192db8-bf9e-425c-a67c-e0e9484157ae&pg=1&colorId1=

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    The one link that I can get to work links me to a dress that is absolutely appropriate formal attire for a morning/afternoon event.  I'm not even actually sure what your concern is- the outfit I see is clearly formalwear.  I would say it's borderline for black tie attire because it's not a full-length gown, but a lot of people would now call this black tie attire, too.  Regardless, it is well within the limits of acceptability for morning/afternoon formal.  (Look at what women wore to the royal wedding last year to get an idea of what that covers.)
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    I agree with the PP. It doesn't scream fomality by itself, but I don't think anyone would think it strange to see this dress at a formal wedding.

    Since they're seperates, could you have them pair it with a longer skirt just to ease your nerves? Ask Alfred Angelo if they will allow you to make a change, and let your bridesmaids know that you wanted a more formal look for your wedding. If body issue is the concern they shouldn't take issue with covering more.
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    Why not just let your MOH wear the dress she choose with the skirt shown (I am guessing she preferred that one over the pencil skirt) and then let the other ladies wear the second dress pictured?  It is perfectly fine to have the MOH dressed differently then the other BMs.  I also think that both dresses have a similar feel to them.  And since they will all be in the same color mixing the two different styles will be fine.

    Finally, these two dresses are completely appropriate for a formal morning wedding.  I hate to bring up the Royal Wedding since that is in a competely different category but think about what the ladies who attended the wedding were wearing...they were wearing beautiful dress "suits".  This is very appropriate and I think will look great at your wedding.

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    edited April 2012
    Like the previous posters, I think the dresses will look fine.  I think it was very accomodating of you to let your bridesmaids pick what they wanted in the color range.

    I was a bit stricter with mine on the dress length(we had a formal church wedding, black tie wasn't requested since we wanted our guests to be comfortable and we figured given the time on the invitation people would know what to wear). 

    I expected my ladies to choose dresses in the same color that flattered them but were floor length(but then again, I was dealing with ladies in their 30s and 20s mostly--my bridesmatron(who was in her 50s) took care of herself[she had a dress in her closet that perfectly matched the color I had chosen by complete coincidence--I was very lucky], however now that I think back on it after two years, it wouldn't have been that big of a deal if they had leg showing.  One lady wore flip flops under her dress and I didn't blame her--she was more comfortable than I was!

    It's much better to let your ladies be comfortable than make them choose what you want.  It will show in the pictures if they are not comfortable--and your crew of bridesmaids are going to ad alot of moral support on the big day.  You won't realize how much support they give you until you're there.

    You'll be fine.  There can be a lot of drama around bridesmaids, but my experience is if they are all wearing the same color, in the end, no one notices.  The best thing you can do is trust that your friends will do their duties--they are good friends after all.
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    Thank you SO much everyone.  I'm starting to feel a little better about the dress(es). By the way, I never really noticed what the guests were wearing to the Royal Wedding (probably because I was so distracted by the hats!).  I'll have to check it out!  LOL!
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