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name change?

annie912annie912 member
First Comment
in Second Weddings
How many of you changed your names when you got remarried? Reasons why or why not?

I really have no good reason why not to, I don't have any children that I want to have the same name as and my name is kind of tricky. I didn't change my name the first time I got married and I thought I would this time, but now I'm not so sure. The biggest reason for me not to change, I will admit, is pretty silly but I still have a kind of sick feeling thinking of it.
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Re: name change?

  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    The decision was totally mine to make and I decided to change my last name to that of my husband's. 

    What makes you queasy to think about it, all the pieces of accumulated stuff that you will have to change? Signing a new name? Sharing your future husband's last name? Or is it something more such as you aren't so sure about the relationship?
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  • annie912annie912 member
    First Comment
    edited February 2012
    I know that it's ridiculous, but I don't want to have the same last name as his kids and his ex-wife. I was okay with having the same name as his kids at first, and we thought his ex-wife was going to go back to her maiden name, but she has now decided to keep his name. That's fine, it's hers too - they were married for 20 years. I'm not saying she should be forced to change it back or have a different name than her kids. Stupid reason, I know, but I'm just stuck on it right now. Probably says something about my issues with becoming a step-mother, but it is what it is.
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  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    I remember not wanting to have the same last name as my DH's ex-wife but it was more important to me to have the same last name as him and my DSD (dear step-daughter).  Being a step-parent is scary and hard but it can be rewarding as well. 
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  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    I did not change my name the first time I married.  I did not change my name when I married last year.  I'll be honest with you, it is just not something that ever made sense to me.  

    If it makes you sick to your stomach to think about changing your name, I'd say to follow that instinct.  Be forewarned, though, that most/many people will assume you and your husband have the same last name. I will always be called Mrs. Firsthusband's Lastname by my son's friends. My new in-laws all assume I am Mrs. Secondhusband's Lastname. And that's okay.



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  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited February 2012
    Lisa I waited until we were applying for the marriage license before I decided to change my last name... It was the right choice for me - but I totally get not wanting to or not seeing the point.

    ETA a missing e....
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  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    I didn't change my name. I've had my name my entire life. I have no issues with anyone who wants to, or doesn't want to. It's a personal decision.
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