Wedding Party

BM Dress Disagreement!

My MOH (sister) and I are having a bit of a disagreement on dresses.  She acutally WANTS 'bridesmaid dresses' I prefer the girls pick out their own short black coctail dresses.  Our wedding is at an Art Center with the reception in the a very modern lounge.  I don't feel like traditional dresses go with the vibe I am picturing.  The colors are black and ivory with black feathers and blush pink flowers.  So, MOH is afraid if the BMs have different dresses no one will know they are bridesmaids..  I was thinking I could get them all a feather brooch to pin on the dresses as a gift and to tie them together?  Thoughts? 

Re: BM Dress Disagreement!

  • KappaKKappaK member
    First Comment
    I think it is great that you want to allow your BMs pick out their own dresses.  I think that everyone will know that they are BMs when they walk down the aisle ahead of you. 
  • Show your sister some of the BM dress lines that have short and tea length dresses, and tell her she can get one of those in black if she wants.  My guess is the pricetag will steer her toward a department store.  You could also offer her the option of an ivory sash to stand out a little.I love your idea, and I love that they are picking their own. 
  • I think that it is great you are letting the girls pick their own dresses...what women doesn't need a LBD in their closet.  Everybody will know who the bms are because they will be standing up with you.  if you would like something to tie everybody together then i think a sash or broach would look really nice. GL!
  • Unless you're having every woman who attends the wedding stand at the front of the church holding bouquets, I think your guests will figure out who the BMs are.Your sis needs to focus a bit less on herself, doesn't she?
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • People will know they're bridesmaids because they're in the ceremony. After that, honestly, nobody really cares who the BMs are. Whether they're in matching dresses or not. When your MOH goes to weddings, does she spend all night staring at the bridal party? Probably not, right? I'd remind her of this. It's your wedding, so you have the right to veto her idea. I'm surprised she's not on board, because I think the LBD and brooch are very good ideas. Other options are sashes or pashminas in your wedding color. Maybe you can get them all to agree to wear a bright-colored shoe ... like, if your wedding color is red, ask them all to pick out a pair of red shoes to wear with the black dresses.
    image
  • Your wedding, your choice.  When she gets married, she can have the BMs be clones so *everyone* knows who they are!  I think everyone will know who they are, and you're going about this the right way.  Tell her she can carry around her bouquet all night if she wants people to know she's a BM.  ;)
  • I'm having my girls pick their own short black dresses too.  Mine is in 2 weeks, I can post pics after if you like.
  • I hear you on this one, except it's my mother-in-law who doesn't like the idea of the girls picking their own style dresses. I try to kindly listen to her input and then say, "I understand, but this is what I want."But believe me I can only say that so many times before I really get angry. She had her opportunity (or will someday) to make all these desicions and she needs to recognize and trust your choices!
  • Thanks so much to all of you for your advice!  I think I'm going to go with the LBD and brooches!  Very simple and chic.  (But I'd still love to see photos of other LBD bridesmaids :)
  • LBDs are great!  It's also a great way for your BMs to save money in this economy.
  • First its your wedding...you choose what you want.  And she can get a 'bridesmaid' dress if she wants it, just make sure she orders it in enough time.  My sister and I butted heads many times.  Like when she threw a fit in the salon because I wouldn't try on a big poofy ballgown (thats what she wants).  She wanted me to have pink dresses I chose plum, she wanted satin and I wanted chiffon ...etc.  Can't make everyone happy...and from what I have seen it is either the sister or the SIL  :)
  • What if you suggest to her a sexy black maxi dress?
    image "Always love. Don't wail til the finish line."-Nada Surf
  • MOH is afraid if the BMs have different dresses no one will know they are bridesmaids..I'm pretty sure the fact they are walking down the aisle carrying bouquets and then posing for photos with the bride would suggest to other guests that they are bridesmaids...I would go with your idea!
  • i would say to your sister " thats not what i had in mind but lets go to a few bridal shops and look at bridesmaid dresses and then i will make up my mind"then do what you really want.
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