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Nerves......HELP!

chance_encounterschance_encounters member
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in Second Weddings
So my wedding is in 2 months.  My 2nd his 1st.  I am 34 he is 32.  We have been together for 2 years.  I have 2 daughters 10 & 6.  Until 4 months ago that was fine.  Now he wants a child of his own (he is an amazing man I am not worried about my girls feeling 2nd best so please don't take it that way).  I had to go through fertility tx for almost 9 years just to be blessed with my 2 daughters.  I don't want to do it again.  1/2 my friends say try for a year with/without tx and if it doesn't work then it wasn't meant to be.  Others say he knew I didn't want any more when we met so he needs to live with it.  What are your thoughts.
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Re: Nerves......HELP!

  • jeannigirljeannigirl member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Is this something that you talked about with him before? Do you not want any more children? You need to really talk with him on this has this is who you are marrying very soon.You can try if you really would like to have a child with him. I would search your heart to see if that is what you really want.
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  • right1thistimeright1thistime member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Whoa.  This is one of those deal breaker kind of situations, IMHO.  I think this would require a serious sit me down and talk until we both feel really comfortable or the wedding needs to be put on hold.   Going into this marriage from such different places on such a visceral topic is pretty dangerous.  If you really don't want another child- your friends are not being respectful of your opinion.  If you marry him and agree to "try" when you don't really want to you are not being true to yourself or fair to him.  This is a mine field. ~Donna
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  • 2dBride2dBride member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If the problem is the difficulty of going through infertility treatment, would you/he be open to adoption?  Or do you have concerns about raising another child, as opposed to just having it?I would agree that this is something you need to work through with him, even if that means postponing the wedding.
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