Wedding Woes

Hoarding in Advance

What can I do??From: Scatterd Scatterd is online. Last active: 8/31/2009 2:52:12 PMNot RankedDate: 8/31/2009 at 2:49 PMOkay, so here's the deal. My fiance proposed about 2 1/2 weeks ago after living together for almost 18 months. Needless to say, I was ecstatic. We had talked about getting married for over a year and I knew he really wanted to have a good deal of input in the planning. So I started asking questions about the future wedding.[As a side note, I'm one of those people that likes to have breakfast planned three days in advance. I make lists of my lists. And that's not an exaggeration at all. So of course, I'm going to start planning things.]Now keep in mind, I wasn't asking whether the napkins at the reception should be ochre or mauve or if we should get peonies or tulips. I asked very broad questions such as what year should we get married or how many bridesmaids / groomsmen he wanted. This is where the *** the fan. He freaks out because apparently I'm overwhelming him. He asked me to not talk about the wedding for two weeks. This was only after a week of being engaged. I figured he just needed to get things together in his head to be able to think about it so I agreed.I kind of made a joke about it and called it "being on probation" and I started making a Word file (5 pages) of things to discuss once the time arose. I was showing my best friend the list and we were going through things and making comments and suggestions. Apparently (as I found out later) he was p/o'ed about the way I said that I was on probation and that I made him sound like a controlling freak. Which he isn't in slightest.I'm just so excited to spend the rest of my life with this man and now it seems like he only asked to marry him to make me happy or to stop nagging (which I wasn't at all). I confronted him about it and he said that he doesn't know when he's going to be ready to talk about any details, and that he's "just not interested" in planning the wedding right now. I've tried explaining to him that there are some very time-sensitive things that we should start doing if we're going to get married before 2011 (like looking at venues, start saving up for and planning a budget, etc.).I don't know if this is cold feet or what. I know he wants to marry me, he's said it a million times and is really excited about it. He just has some great distaste for wedding planning or something. I need advice. What should I say / do? Is there anything I *can* do?From: VarunaTTVarunaTT is online. Last active: 8/31/2009 2:53:36 PMA FIVE PAGE LIST!?!?!?!?!?Damn, I would've given you a Ho Sit Down card too.From: loveshine1loveshine1 is online. Last active: 8/31/2009 2:54:14 PMTop 500 PostsDate: 8/31/2009 at 2:51 PMThere's nothing you can do, other than not being a harpy."I've said it before, and I'll say it again: sluts just heal quicker!" ~ Sophia PetrilloFrom: baconsmombaconsmom is online. Last active: 8/31/2009 2:54:16 PMHoly shitballs. You're crazy.Tell him you want to go to the courthouse and get married. Not making 5 page lists about a party =/= not excited to be married. He probably would love to just have a wife, and not have to listen to neurotic control freakiness about a PARTY for the next two years.FFS.I have a date for Sunday night.

Re: Hoarding in Advance

  • Man....I got all excited and thought this was a post about actual hoarding.
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  • From: hmonkey Date: 8/31/2009 at 3:03 PM i can't believe this dude held out for 18 months because you know she was all up in his face about getting married.   --------------------------------------------------------------------------------"silly silly idiotick hmonkey you would rather continue to pick on me as if you were so so much better ugh you are a mean jerk. ." -- ffmaid  From: L_Woods Date: 8/31/2009 at 3:04 PM I think the part that makes it seem harpy, crazy and neurotic is that all of this has gone down in the last 2.5 weeks.   --------------------------------------------------------------------------------   From: loveshine1 Date: 8/31/2009 at 3:05 PM Seriously. Give it some time. My BFF got engaged in April. They haven't even set a date yet. RELAX! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------"I've said it before, and I'll say it again: sluts just heal quicker!" ~ Sophia Petrillo  
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