Delaware

a little sad :(

My FMIL called us last night really upset because with her recent  heart problems (she had 2 heart attacks earlier this month), she doesn't think she can fly out to be at our wedding (she lives in CA).  She has cardiac arrhythimia (problems with the heart beat) and she is afraid something will happen to her if she were to fly (cabin pressure and such).  FI is very upset because of everyone invited the wedding, he wanted her there the most.  He is upset she won't be in any pictures and won't be there to hear the ceremony or to dance with him with the Mother/Son dance.  I told her I understand, and that we can't be selfish.  I would rather her live a lot longer so she can enjoy possible grandchildren down the road, and not risk it by coming out for our wedding.  We are looking into a train/ bus/ or just driving out, but they can be very long and very expensive, especially since she is living on social security and disability.  If all else fails, I'll just have mine or FI's cell phone on during the ceremony so she can hear everything. 

Re: a little sad :(

  • edited December 2011
    Aww Lura I'm so sorry! I hope you're able to find another way for her to be there (like the train you suggested). Everything will work out for the best!
  • amlinton1615amlinton1615 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Aww I'm sorry Lura.  Hopefully she'll find a way to attend and if she can't, maybe you could get a copy of the video to send to her.  I'm sure she would appreciate that.   Keeping her in my thoughts and prayers.
  • MrsJax09MrsJax09 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    awww Lura that is sad :( Are you having a videographer? Maybe you can get extra copies or have a friend tape the ceremony and the highlights of the reception so it can be sent to her if you can't get her here by bus/train. I have to say though, I agree with her that it may nor be so wise for her to fly if pressure changes cause her issue. {{HUGS}} Our knottie minds can figure something out.
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  • edited December 2011
    I am so sorry to hear this, Lura.  It must be so tough on FI.  Things will work out, somehow, someway.An idea that we have toyed with doing is an internet feed.  Since Brian's grandmother can't come to the wedding, if she is still around, we have thought about setting up a webcam, having a private internet address to go to (you need a password, etc), and then they can watch at the same time as everyone else.  Could this maybe be something that is done for your FMIL?
  • bubblyblondybubblyblondy member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Lura, I am so sorry to hear this :( I hope something is figured out by getting her there by train, car or whatever. Or, if not hopefully have the cellphone, or internet and send her a video.... Hope things get better. :)
  • edited December 2011
    Awww Lura - that super sucks for you and Rich :( Hopefully a train/bus ticket can be worked in the budget...  Or like Brit suggested a web cam.  Im sure something will work out, but it still sucks :(
  • edited December 2011
    Aw Lura, I'm so sorry.  That is a big change to the wedding plans and it totally sucks.  :(  But cardiac arrhythmia can be very severe and scary - you don't know when an attack will come on, especially in compromised conditions.  Again, I'm sorry.  It'd be cool if you could set up like a webcam or something??
  • lmicoluccilmicolucci member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The webcam idea sounds cool.  How do I go about getting one set up?  I'm sure my cousin Aubrey could rig something up..i'll give him a call.
  • lmicoluccilmicolucci member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh, and Thanks to all of you for your well wishes.  FI is so distraught over this. 
  • kimb2dkimb2d member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Lura, Sorry. I like the idea of the extra video, so she will see everthing as it was the day of. Although, it is nowhere near actually having her there, maybe there may be a way to honor her. Our situation was a little different in that it was another generation out... Jeff's grandfather was not able to make the trip (from CA also), so we wrote a little something to him and my grandmother (that ended up not being able to attend) in the program. After the wedding, we sent a program, menu, and favor bag to his grandfather as well as pictures. Will you guys make the trip out to CA anytime in the next year or so? Although it may be a lot of work, you could always have your dress, Rich in a suit and a photographer to take pictures with her out there.
  • lmicoluccilmicolucci member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    you know kim, I was thinking the exact same thing. I just have to make sure my gown still fits.
  • kimb2dkimb2d member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Lura, I'm sure you will be fine! Although it is no where near the situation, Jeff's mom died 4 + years ago, and we did a memorial frame.  I am SO glad we did.... it was a picture of his mom and dad together.... even though Jeff's dad has a current girlfriend, it still brought tears to his eyes.  He even took us aside afterwards and told us how nice it was.... Although she has not passed, maybe a frame with her picture (and with Rich - if possible) may be a neat idea. ???  You can make sure the photo. and video. people get pictures of it, so she knows she "was there".  We also did a digital photo frame with pictures of us as babies, and over the years and us together.... maybe you can do something like that to remember those that are unable to be there.  Please let me know if you need or want any ideas of what we used... I can always lend the stuff to you, if you are interested. Kim
  • lmicoluccilmicolucci member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Update:  The Farmhouse does not have WiFI so we will not be able to do a webcam.  Kim-LOVE the idea of the frame and the videographer can put it in the video. 
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