Maryland-Baltimore

Eloping

Fiancee and I are considering eloping for various and assorted reasons and still having our "official" wedding in March 2010.  We are looking for ideas for eloping in Baltimore....the city is a special place for us, but we live in Southern Maryland and have no idea what to do in the city.It will only be the two of us and we're open to just about anything.  We don't mind a JOP or Judge, but would prefer not the inside of a courthouse.  The wedding would be in November or over New Years.Any suggestions ladies?
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Re: Eloping

  • edited December 2011
    Don't do it unless you plan on telling your family that you're already married.
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  • hollieheidihollieheidi member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Arbolita...not sure I saw your suggestion as to where?  Did I miss it? I had hoped that I wouldn't have to specify that I didn't request opinions on whether I should or should not.  I did, however, ask if anyone knew of anywhere that would be a nice place to get married. Sorry to be so snarky, but I came to you ladies as the local board.  I understand that when I ask I may recieve any kind of answer you choose to give me.  With that said, thank you for taking the time to reply, but I am still asking the other ladies out there for suggestions. Thanks again!  
  • edited December 2011
    I don't have a suggestion as to where, because as the sister of someone who had a secret wedding and lied about it for 7 months, I know first hand what it does to families when they find out.  It's not fun or pretty and there will be a lot of negative feelings along the way.
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  • hollieheidihollieheidi member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm sorry for your situation and your hurt feelings.  Please just don't assume though.  Not all situations are the same.Again, thank you for taking the time to relpy and I hope that your family was able to move past the situation and become a happy loving family.Sorry......still looking for an intimate romantic spot in Baltimore.......
  • Andrea_LeaAndrea_Lea member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    best suggestion? www.google.com YWIA! HTH!
  • mdchica02mdchica02 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I found this for you: For couples that want to elope in Maryland, the Gramercy Mansion has a package perfect for eloping that includes the ceremony, photographer, dinner for two and one nights accommodation. The inn is located in secluded countryside just 20 minutes from downtown Baltimore. I have heard gramercy is a popular location. HTH!
  • edited December 2011
    1. How about on a sailboat. I know some folks that got married on the Pintita a charterboat in the harbor I know the captain can do weddings 2. Regarding however your elopment wedding and big event months later. That is fine however please please do not lie to your family and friends and call teh later event a wedding as it is not because you will already be married. Tell those close to you the day you get married and then go ahead and have a later reception and party a few months later but lying to your loved ones WILL perminatly damage your relationships with them when they find out and they will find out eventually that you are liars if you do this.
  • valf8222valf8222 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think the above suggestions are good.  But just thinking about it if you got married over New Years it is only three months earlier than your planned wedding date.  Just saying...Also as to your family being hurt and feeling mislead I think the more elaborate your "elopement" is the more hurt and left out I would feel as a family member. If you are not considering your "elopement" your "official wedding" then I would keep it as low key as possible.I do recommend being honest though with your guests esepcially your family.
  • edited December 2011
    You don't get to pick-and-choose the responses you get on a public message board.  If you didn't want opinions on your super-secret wedding, then why not just say "hey, looking for a small, intimate reception venue in the Baltimore area!"You threw it out there.Best of luck on your search. 
  • edited December 2011
    Andrea - LMAO. Go Dani go! My thoughts exactly. Tree have a fabulous wedding weekend and ignore the rudeness!
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  • edited December 2011
    Ditto Rvnsgrl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • edited December 2011
    The Antrim is not in Baltimore proper, but a beautiful setting and you could have a wonderful meal and beautiful setting for your ceremony. Same with the Admiral Fell Inn, which is in Baltimore city. Good luck!
  • ajerome21ajerome21 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    WOW!!! This board is so funny! LOL!!!! Hollieheidi- Inner Harbor, Fells Point, Federal Hill.  Sorry, I don't have many suggestions for Baltimore.  Two couples I know went to Vegas and it was beautiful.  Both had the ceremony outside, and the pics turned out amazing.  Good luck with whatever you decide!!!!
  • edited December 2011
    No location suggestions, but I agree with those who say that you need to tell your family and not call your 2010 vow renewal, church wedding or reception an "official" wedding.  It takes a lot less than a secret wedding to break the trust and respect of those close to you.
  • edited December 2011
    ajerome...are you jboggs' friend??  if so, I'm Donna (her friend not from work)...small world if you are who I'm thinking of :)
  • edited December 2011
    ajerome - believe me. It's not funny when you're one of the family members of somebody who does this.  They will find out sooner or later, and there is a lot of fallout, drama and tension because of it.
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  • crfischecrfische member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Dear close loved ones, I know that you have helped raise me, have loved me unconditionally, and have been so important to me in my life, but you just aren't special enough for us to show you decency and respect and let you know that we decided we want to get married alone, just the two of us, and lie to you about it. You shouldn't get mad at us, because we are just evil people.Anyway, you are special enough to bring us a present in March, so please keep this date open because, man, we really need money. And stuff, too, but I'd rather have money.Since you love me so much, you know I deserve my pretty princess day. Love Us,Hollie
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    Vacation with Alix, Andy, Mandy, and FLORENCE. AND HER MACHINE.

    The Margarita Evolution
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  • ajerome21ajerome21 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    yes donna, it's me!!!!  lol. I actually work with Jenn today.I heard you changed your wedding plans.  Have you set a new date, location, etc?Yes, small world!!!
  • AmoroAgainAmoroAgain member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    DED.  Fischey you aren't succinct, but you make the most wonderful points. :D
  • tracy_ktracy_k member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I just want to point out that getting married via JOP in advance and then having a "real" wedding with family and friends later does not always come with nefarious intentions, nor does it have to cause undue drama.Sometimes there are practical reasons for a couple to need the legal certification before they're ready to have their wedding celebration with family and friends, and it doesn't always mean they're gift-grubbing "glassbowls" who get off on lying to their families and friends.
  • crfischecrfische member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The "real" WEDDING was at the JOP. They are having a vow renewal if they plan to have a gift bringing event at a later date.
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    Vacation with Alix, Andy, Mandy, and FLORENCE. AND HER MACHINE.

    The Margarita Evolution
    image
  • ajerome21ajerome21 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Arbolita - I skipped over your comment you left for me.  I just read it and I am a little confused.  you said something like -" it's not funny if this happened to you or something." I want you to know that I was not laughing at your situation that you keep talking about.  I would never do that.  I really don't understand how you even assumed I was laughing about that.  I said "wow, this board is funny"One, that is my opinion which I am entitled to.  Just as you felt the need to express your opinion based on a bad personal experience you had and did it without even knowing this person's situation.  Two, the comments being posted are pretty funny.  Hollieheidi response to you made me giggle just as your response back make me giggle.  FieryIrishAngel - great giggle (super-secret-wedding).  I guess I have to spell it out for you - I, in my opinion, think the snarky responses are funny not a bad pesonal experience that happened to you.  Three, it's obvious that other people find the comments amusing because of the comments being left.  I believe someone wrote "LMAO!"  So for you to single me out and insinuate that I am laughing at you is just crazy to me.
  • edited December 2011
    ajerome - I'm sorry if I misinterpreted what you were saying.  I thought you meant by saying that the board was funny, you were insinuating that people telling her not to lie to her family about it were being silly by not just answering her question and giving advice/opinions on the subject.  I apologize since it does not seem like that's what you meant.Tracy - I totally get that there are some legitimate reasons for people to get eloped - if there is an issue with insurance, if one is about to get deployed, etc.  I'm not against eloping in general and having a vow renewal later, just if you hide it from your families and act like your "wedding" later on is the real thing.  I think in most families if you have a valid reason for needing that piece of paper earlier, your family would understand that.
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  • mdchica02mdchica02 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think you girls need to let *hollieheidi" make her own decisions. You dont know her situation or her family. She asked for a place in Baltimore to have her wedding and I think that you should either ignore her post or give her advice on what she actually asked for. I come from a family who has caused a lot of stress for me with my wedding planning because none of them care enough about the actual wedding or planning. There has been plenty of times where I wanted to have an intimate eloping and then have a party for family and friends afterwards. That reason was definitely not because I just wanted people to shower us with gifts.
  • tracy_ktracy_k member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    arbolita -- I think we're pretty much on the same page, I'm not a fan of lying to friends and family either. And I'm sorry that happened to you, I'm sure I'd be really hurt if someone I was close to did that. The only two times (that I know of, LOL) that it's happened with my friends, I was one of those "in the know," but neither of them told their families because their very religious parents would have freaked right the heck out. One was a military couple who got married before their wedding to insure they'd be stationed together, the other involved a job loss and hefty insurance bills unless they did the deed. Oddly, both couples were very religious. In their eyes they didn't consider themselves actually married until they were blessed by their church, the legal side was just a piece of paper.
  • tracy_ktracy_k member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    crfische -- I guess some people consider a wedding to be more than just the legal part that makes you husband and wife, or a gift-bringing event.
  • ajerome21ajerome21 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    hollieheidi - Annapolis has some great spots as well, you may want to consider there unless you are dead set on Baltimore.You may want to look at some Baltimore photographers websites.  They would have great shots of the city.  I am looking to do my engagement pics and have been on many photographers' websites and have found so many romantic spots in the city just looking at couples' e-pics.  I completely agree - Tracy-K and MDChica02. Arbolita - Thank you and I appreciate the apology.  All is forgiven! Also, I want to note that she never said that she was going to lie to her family and if she does it's not our place to judge or to tell her what to do.  The only thing she said was "every situation is different." People assumed and attacked without even knowing what she's doing.  And honestly, who cares what she does... it has nothing to do with you.  I am only touching on this bc I do see this alot on boards and it bothers me but I usually just ignore it.  hollieheidi - like i said before, good luck on whatever you decide.
  • edited December 2011
    Since I was sort of singled out for my "LMAO" off comment I would like to reply....if you noticed I said Andrea LMAO meaning I was replying to her response not to anything else so please don't go that route. If I had written just LMAO I would understand, but no need to drag other people into things.And for the love of it please leave Tree alone she is getting married in a few days!
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  • edited December 2011
    I don't think anyone on here is against the whole wedding beforehand, then reception later, Tree was just offering a response she felt was appropriate, like FIA said, you can't pick and choose your responses if you're on a public board. Snarkiness was brought to the thread (ahem, "...not sure I saw your suggestion as to where? Did I miss it?") so snarky responses followed, plain and simple.
  • edited December 2011
    I didn't comment on her eloping - I commented on her demand that she only get the answer she's looking for.  If you're going to participate in the big bad internet community, you need to understand that A: You are not a unique flower, B: No one's going to do sh1t your way, and C: People ARE going to judge you.  If you can't accept that, then do your own damn research and don't ask for help.
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