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Is it normal....

txmom21txmom21
First Comment
in Second Weddings
to feel like the wedding has become a runaway train and you want to get off? I'm a little over 6 months out with most of the planning done, but I keep getting completely overwhelmed with the money we're spending and the idea that this would really just be better if we did something small and simple. FI wants the big celebration b/c neither one of us had it the first time. I just want to be married. That's not to say this is totally against my will, but I would be just as happy with 10 people in a small room.
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Re: Is it normal....

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    right1thistimeright1thistime member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    By the time we finally got married, we had resigned ourselves to the refrain, "eh, its only money".  One of brides on this board when I first joined called her wedding exactly what you said "the runaway cash train".For DH and I, every decision we made we were inevitably happy with - except the expen$ive cake- which we just got caught up in the tasting and spent a ridiculous amount of money on.  Go back over your decisions- not to reverse them, but to reassure yourself that you are spending money for what you want.  For us, great food- worth the money.  PLentiful beverages - yep.  Gorgeous flowers - absolutely.  Extravagant (for us) honeymoon - yes- we will only get this once.  Sparkly jewelry - gonna wear it every single day.  Things like the DJ, photog, paper, transportation were bargain hunted.  Good quality, but not top of the line.   I think 6 months out is when the reality of it starts to hit.  Take the weekend off from wedding brain- it'll all look better next week.  ~Donna
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    txmom21txmom21
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks, Donna! Taking a step back and looking at things is a great idea. Hopefully once I do that, my stress level will dial back a bit.
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    LesPaulLesPaul member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree w/ Donna.  We spent more than I thought we would at first glance, but considered what was really important along the way and were ultimately very happy with everything.  Relax and picture the day - family, friends, food, ceremony, celebration mood, music . . . I'm glad we spent a little money to have the most memorable day ever.  Maybe you'll feel a little better if you sit down and put together a priority list - cut back where you feel it's appropriate, if necessary.  But don't skimp on yourselves and what you really feel is important for the day.
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    Catalina Island BoundCatalina Island Bound
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am just under 6 months and I feel like I'm a passenger on that runaway train! Someone on the DW Board started posting how many Mondays she had left (she was getting really close to leaving) and it made me realize I have 23 Mondays before we're on our Cruise. That means 23 Wednesdays from this past Wednesday we will be married. That is when I freaked out. *23* That is not that many weeks.

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    handfast4mehandfast4me member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It's OK to get OFF THE TRAIN! I did. I was looking at the knot, attended bridal fairs, etc. and then we decided to just go to Key West and get married, just the two of us, no guests, no attendants.  It was incredibly romantic, private, and much better than my first, mid-sized wedding.  I think a lot of us get caught up because the wedding INDUSTRY says that's what we're supposed to do.  You don't have to--you can stop it all right now.  I really got only crap from a few ladies on these boards about what we did, and one of my sisters wanted to throw me a huge reception, but I resisted, and was very glad I did.   Look at offbeatbride.com at some alternatives--wish I'd seen that site long before the knot, and read the Concious Bride, too.  A quick read that gives you reasons for all the feelings you're having.
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