Etiquette

Second year in a row, Wedding scheduled the day before my birthday!

I just want to know what gives.  Last year my uncle married courtney and she was the one planning the wedding.  She decided to have the wedding on August 7th, the day before mine and my uncle's birthday as well as the day OF my dad's birthday.  What further offended me was that when we brought this to her attention she IGNORED the comment, didn't come to my birthday party the next day, and didn't give me a birthday present although they normally do.  Meanwhile I had to shell out for a shower gift, wedding present, and miss out on being able to have a party with my friends.  I mean she totally could have smoothed things over when they did all the toasts during the reception but she didn't. 

Now, this year my husband's cousin is also getting married the day before my birthday.  I am sorely tempted not to be in attendance because of how this makes me feel.  I mean, honestly when I planned my wedding it wasn't on anybody else's birthday and if I had done that I would have at least agknowledged it.  I just feel jipped.  I mean it was a bigger deal last year because it was my 21st birthday and I couldn't even drink at the reception.  But this seems like a pattern.  How do I address this so it doesn't happen to me again?!
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Re: Second year in a row, Wedding scheduled the day before my birthday!

  • Oh FFS.

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    "Whatever East. You're just mad I RSVP'd "lame" to your pre-wedding sleepover."
  • it's a conspiracy
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  • What does it matter if the wedding is before your birthday?
    People aren't going to come to your party?
    Are you 8?
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  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
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    Seriously?  Your birthday happens every year, most people only get married once.  You are being ridiculous and childish.
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  • You could at least TRY not to make it so obvious, you know?  No real person acts like this.  What, was "my parents won't pay for my wedding" not avaliable today?

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    "Whatever East. You're just mad I RSVP'd "lame" to your pre-wedding sleepover."
  • In Response to Second year in a row, Wedding scheduled the day before my birthday!:
    I just want to know what gives.  Last year my uncle married courtney and she was the one planning the wedding.  She decided to have the wedding on August 7th, the day before mine and my uncle's birthday as well as the day OF my dad's birthday.  What further offended me was that when we brought this to her attention she IGNORED the comment, didn't come to my birthday party the next day, and didn't give me a birthday present although they normally do.  Meanwhile I had to shell out for a shower gift, wedding present, and miss out on being able to have a party with my friends.  I mean she totally could have smoothed things over when they did all the toasts during the reception but she didn't.  Now, this year my husband's cousin is also getting married the day before my birthday.  I am sorely tempted not to be in attendance because of how this makes me feel.  I mean, honestly when I planned my wedding it wasn't on anybody else's birthday and if I had done that I would have at least agknowledged it.  I just feel jipped.  I mean it was a bigger deal last year because it was my 21st birthday and I couldn't even drink at the reception.  But this seems like a pattern.  How do I address this so it doesn't happen to me again?!
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  • In Response to Second year in a row, Wedding scheduled the day before my birthday!:
    I just want to know what gives.  Last year my uncle married courtney and she was the one planning the wedding.  She decided to have the wedding on August 7th, the day before mine and my uncle's birthday as well as the day OF my dad's birthday.  What further offended me was that when we brought this to her attention she IGNORED the comment, didn't come to my birthday party the next day, and didn't give me a birthday present although they normally do.  Meanwhile I had to shell out for a shower gift, wedding present, and miss out on being able to have a party with my friends.  I mean she totally could have smoothed things over when they did all the toasts during the reception but she didn't.  Now, this year my husband's cousin is also getting married the day before my birthday.  I am sorely tempted not to be in attendance because of how this makes me feel.  I mean, honestly when I planned my wedding it wasn't on anybody else's birthday and if I had done that I would have at least agknowledged it.  I just feel jipped.  I mean it was a bigger deal last year because it was my 21st birthday and I couldn't even drink at the reception.  But this seems like a pattern.  How do I address this so it doesn't happen to me again?!
    Posted by meg2487
    OMG. I should have read the first time.
    This is beyond the boundaries of ridiculous.
    I haven't received birthday presents from anyone other than my parents and my H for like 15 years, possibly longer.
    And there's "jipped". "Jipped" of what?

    I think you should throw yourself a birthday party during the reception. That oughtta teach those jerks for messing with your birthday.
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  • Ditto east and Mandy.  I can't even say "nice try," because it wasn't. 
  • Is this a joke? Who cares if a wedding is ON or the day before or after someone's birthday. The world doesn't revolve around one person.
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  • You know what you should do? You should have a company deliver one of those blow up castles to her reception venue, and hire a face painter and rent a dunk tank. Celebrate your birthday AT HER WEDDING!!! THAT'LL SHOW HER!!!
  • If you're so offended by it, don't go.  That will save everyone from having to put up with your attitude. 
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  • Today is my FIs birthday... I am taking him to a nice dinner.  For my bday- I went out and celebrated with 2 of my best friends a couple days after (which was really just an excuse for the 3 of us to hang out).

    Unless you are under the age of 10.. bdays are not a big deal anymore and aren't always celebrated on the actual birthday (ie Saturday before or after if it's a weekday birthday).

    My cousin was born on Dec. 25th... and some dude born over 2000 years ago keeps hogging all her glory.. can you believe that guy!?!??!
  • HAHAHAHAH! Seriously? This can't be real. And I don't usually jump on the troll bandwagon, but, seriously? Did you create an account on a wedding forum just to complain about someone else's wedding date?
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  • In Response to Second year in a row, Wedding scheduled the day before my birthday!:
    I just want to know what gives.  Last year my uncle married courtney and she was the one planning the wedding.  She decided to have the wedding on August 7th, the day before mine and my uncle's birthday as well as the day OF my dad's birthday.  What further offended me was that when we brought this to her attention she IGNORED the comment, didn't come to my birthday party the next day, and didn't give me a birthday present although they normally do.  Meanwhile I had to shell out for a shower gift, wedding present, and miss out on being able to have a party with my friends.  I mean she totally could have smoothed things over when they did all the toasts during the reception but she didn't.  Now, this year my husband's cousin is also getting married the day before my birthday.  I am sorely tempted not to be in attendance because of how this makes me feel.  I mean, honestly when I planned my wedding it wasn't on anybody else's birthday and if I had done that I would have at least agknowledged it.  I just feel jipped.  I mean it was a bigger deal last year because it was my 21st birthday and I couldn't even drink at the reception.  But this seems like a pattern.  How do I address this so it doesn't happen to me again?!
    Posted by meg2487
    Dude, no one gives a rat's ass about your birthday past the age of like 5. And don't address it unless you'd like everyone you know to think you're a raving, egomaniacal lunatic.
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  • Oh for cryin' outloud! Seriously?!

    One of my BFs got married on my 21st birthday & that was seriously one of the BEST birthdays EVER!!!! It was so muchfun!

    Get over yourself.....it's your birthday....you have one every year...they're only getting married this one time.

    Selfish, I tell ya. Just selfish.

  • Oh good grief, whaaaaaa.  Party another night.  Most everyone I know celebrates their birthday on the nearest Saturday these days.

    Or, you could be like me, and have a birthday the day before Christ's birthday.  Yeah, I NEVER get a party on my actual birthday.

    Cry me a friggin' river.  Other people's wedding plans do not revolve around your birthday.
  • I''m getting married on my cousins 12th birthday and my Grandmothers 90-something birthday. I guess its a good thing I called her a year ahead of time to make sure it was ok, and that Granny doesn't realize what day it is, much less that its her birthday. or they might have been offended like you. Geeze!!
  • Well, clearly no one likes you and that explains that.

    Oh, and your birthday parties are probably lame and the brides are just helping everyone have an excuse not to attend. 

  • Have fun canvassing your entire extended family for their birth dates when you plan your own wedding.
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  • I'm mostly upset because it's two years in a row.  It takes up most of my weekend with festivities and then I don't get to have a party.  Nobody is going to come to a birthday party a week after the fact.  Plus with the other wedding she had me make all the bridesmaids jewelry and said she'd pay me back for it and she still hasn't made any effort.  I gave her all the receipts for supplies.  I am a college student and I don't exactly have $50 to just GIVE her for stuff she said she'd pay me back for.  I mean I'm trying to figure out how to put gas in my car...
  • Yes, I'm pretty sure everyone in the world should consult you before they make plans of any kind.

    My cousin got married ON my dad's birthday. It was an OOT wedding for us. We went to visit for 2 weeks (one week before, one after). I can't remember us doing anything for my dad and I don't remember him complaining at all. Maybe because his birthday often gets overshadowed by Labor Day. Undecided
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  • In Response to Re: Second year in a row, Wedding scheduled the day before my birthday!:
    I'm mostly upset because it's two years in a row.  It takes up most of my weekend with festivities and then I don't get to have a party.  Nobody is going to come to a birthday party a week after the fact.  Plus with the other wedding she had me make all the bridesmaids jewelry and said she'd pay me back for it and she still hasn't made any effort.  I gave her all the receipts for supplies.  I am a college student and I don't exactly have $50 to just GIVE her for stuff she said she'd pay me back for.  I mean I'm trying to figure out how to put gas in my car...
    Posted by meg2487
    I'm mostly upset because you're not a very interesting troll. I also am not seeing how your making jewelry or whatever the hell you're talking about has anything to do with anything. And if you can't put gas in your car, I suggest not spending money on a birthday party. Just sayin.
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  • jayjoejayjoe member
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  • Guess what! The world doesn't always revolve around you. I'd be surprised if your husband's cousin even knew when your birthday was. Heck, my uncle doesn't know when my birthday is.

    Maybe your dad didn't mind that his wedding was the day of his birthday. The older people get, the less significance they place on birthday parties. YOu must be 5.

    Why you expect people to plan a very important occaision around your birthday is beyond my scope of understanding. When you plan your wedding are you going to take a survey of all your extended family before you set at date? I think not. You are just a selfish attention whore and you need to get over yourself. Seriously.  

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  • In Response to Re: Second year in a row, Wedding scheduled the day before my birthday!:
    Um..i think i smell my pot roast burning!! I'll be right back....
    Posted by jayjoe
    that's also pretty lame.

    OP - WHO has birthday parties at an age old enough to get married? I mean, we'll get together at a bar for my birthday, but I would by no means call it a birthday party, most of all, I wouldn't be upset if someone couldn't make it.
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  • There's an AWESOME movie you should watch - it's a little older - from the 80's, and has Mary from Little House on the Prairie in it - Melissa Sue Anderson.

    It's called Happy Birthday to Me. It would be perfect for you. Netflix has it.
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    Do not mess in the affairs of dinosaurs because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
    I love you Missy. Even though you are not smart enough to take online quizzes to find out really important information. ~cew
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