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Cocktail Reception - Opinions Please I am Nervous

rj0319rj0319
First Comment
in California-San Diego
Okay Knotties- I want to have a cocktail wedding reception, but have never been to one myself and am worried about how my guest will take it. So here are some facts: 
  • 160 guests of both family and friends (all local so cal residents)
  • Reception length is from 6p-12a
  • A fun party with open, free flowing bar is in our top 3 important aspects in a reception (our venue allows us to bring in our own alcohol w/o corkage fees)
  • Heavy hors d'oeuvres will be served/ passed, enough to fill their tummies and not starve
  • This type of reception was chosen as a way to bring attention more towards the party as opposed to being stationary on the groom and I, and allow us to remember and spend time with ALL of our guests
  • The venue is conducive to this type of reception, looks like a lounge/ club
  • There are different types of seating areas, lounge furniture, belly tables and cocktail rounds (enough seating for approx 50-60 at one time)
Okay now here are my concerns:1) I feel like 6 hours is too long to have a cocktail reception, but I still want to do many "traditional" aspects of a reception (Speeches, dances, etc.)  Should I shorten the length of the reception? 2) Should every butt have a seat? Places to sit are available but not for EVERYONE to sit all at once 3)Do I have enough hors d'oeuvres (15 pieces/person)? 4) I am worried about what the traditional type family members will say about an unconventional reception

Honest opinions please I still have time to change to a sit down!Embarassed

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Re: Cocktail Reception - Opinions Please I am Nervous

  • jrenebjreneb
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    A cocktail reception sounds like a fun idea, but 6 hours without seats for everyone does like something you might want to reconsider.  The thing with cocktail hours is that after a while they get boring.  It's good that you want to add some traditional aspects though.  When you have a cocktail hour and an actual meal it keeps the evening flowing, gives the guests something different to do with hors d'oeuvres, salad, entree etc.  That is something I would keep in mind.  But to combat that, you could start with stationary apps for a bit.  Then move on to passed, having one or two different one's passed at a time as opposed to all the hors d'oeuvres flavors coming at the same time.  That creates a bit of a flow to the evening and guests won't be looking for something new to eat b/c you will have it set up that way.  I would recommend figuring out a way to add more seating to the area though.

    I work in the food and beverage industry and have worked many banquets and wedding receptions.  Ultimately, you should go for whatever type of reception you want and remember that your options are limitless; you can get as creative as you want to.  I'm sure if you and your fiancee start bouncing ideas you can create the vision you have, while still making it an unforgettable experience for your guests!
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  • rj0319rj0319
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    @ jreneb - thanks for the advice!  I like the idea of keeping the flow through the changing of the food.   I am going to be looking for a good DJ/MC duo to keep the party flow as well.
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  • MonciaanneMonciaanne member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I went to a reception where they just had hors d'oeuvres and it was fun but it didn't really feel like a wedding.  It was set up like a regular reception with chairs and tables so that was nice, but it was more of a party than a reception.  There were not that many hors d'oeuvres, you kept having to get up to get more, and the food really ended up getting boring (maybe this was because there were not that many options).  I think it is a nice idea but I would not recommend it.
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  • frenchy730frenchy730 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you're having your reception during the time when people would normally eat a meal, then yes, it is the proper thing to do to serve a meal.  I wouldn't be happy if I was at a reception starting at 6 and there was no dinner.  I'd probably leave to go eat, and probably would not come back.  Especially if the reception is scheduled for 6 hours with snacks only.

    Is there anyway you could push your timeline back so everything starts later (like 8 pm)?  And of course tell people that it will be a cocktail reception so that they know to get dinner before coming.
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  • jrenebjreneb
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    where is your reception at?  i may have some ideas for seating...
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  • rj0319rj0319
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for the opinions!!  These are exactly the things that I have been worried about.  I just recently emailed a reference that the venue gave me for the MOB that had this type of  reception last wknd.  So I am waiting to hear how that went.  Do you think that is reliable reference though?  
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  • ce11andersence11andersen member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    i love your idea and have been discussing a very similar idea with my fiance.  its nice to know im not the only one who doesnt want the traditional/stationary reception.  i am in the process of looking for a place and caterers who can meet my ideas.  where are you havingn your reception? 
    I do agree that then time should be shortened.  i wasn thinking for mine to have the ceremony start at 7:30 with reception to follow right after. also not everyone will stay til 12am
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Comment
    I am also planning the same type of event! Well, more in the "beginning" planning stages :) I read somewhere that a good rule of thumb for a cocktail reception is to have seating for 80% of your guests...which makes sense to me, because without a seated dinner, there's no way that every wedding guest will be seated at the same point in time. Also, I agree on shortening the time - ceremony at 8pm with cocktail hour starting at 8:30/9:00 still gives you plenty of time to do the traditional dances / speeches / etc.

    I would also love to know where you are having your reception! I am looking for a venue in San Diego. Any tips would help :)
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