Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
New Discussion

How long was your catholic wedding?

vwhelan85vwhelan85 member
First Comment
in Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
Our wedding seems to be about an hour but we would prefer is 30 minutes. My fiancee doesn't want mass now for the reason that it is so long but my mom (who isn't even catholic) thinks its rude because most guests are catholic. Has anyone had a similar problem? How do you shorten it?

Thanks!
Report Reply to Post

Re: How long was your catholic wedding?

  • ericaandtom2012ericaandtom2012 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    If you're doing a full Catholic mass, you can't really shorten it.  It's going to be about an hour, maybe even slightly more.  You and your FI need to decide if you two want a mass for your wedding and if that's what right for you as a couple. It doesn't matter what the religions of any of your guests are, what matters is yours and your FI's religion/spirituality. 
    Report Reply
  • MobKazMobKaz member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited October 2012
    The marriage rite takes slightly less time than a full Mass; the only difference is that there is no Consecration/Communion. There will still be  readings, a homily, Rite of Marriage, petitions, and prayers. 

    The bigger differential is often more dependent on the priest, how slowly or quickly he offers his readings and prayers, and how "chatty" he decides to be during the homily.
    Report Reply
  • ootmother2ootmother2 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
     1 hr. 15 minutes. full mass & deacon (uncle of the bride) doing the ceremony.

    Their songs and readings were beautiful but a bit long
    Report Reply
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    about an hour
    Report Reply
  • GoodLuckBear14GoodLuckBear14 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    If you and your FI are both Catholic and being married in the church, you really should have the full mass.  People going to Catholic weddings know that it is going to be about an hour - the length of most Sunday services that I've attended.  I really think your FI needs to suck it up here.  The extra 30 minutes isn't going to kill him.
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
    Report Reply
  • Riss91Riss91 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    My sister's ceremony without mass was 45 minutes. Most Catholic weddings with mass tend to be about an hour. Ours was about an hour and 20 minutes, but we had a traditional Solemn High Mass in Latin, which is probably the longest cereony possible. None of our guests cared about the time. It goes by so quickly, I am sure your FI wouldn't notice and extra 20-30 minutes.

    Report Reply
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its

    Our mass was just under an hour.  We had 100 people attending and most are Catholic.  We asked my Eucharistic Minister cousin to assist during communion to help the priest out, so that helped it go faster, I think.  My BIL had a ceremony only, no mass and it was about 30 minutes long.  But they also had no singer and the Response Psalm was spoken, not sung.

    And as PP mentioned, if 2 Catholics are marrying, it is preferred that a full mass is done.

    Report Reply
  • theelusive1theelusive1
    First Comment
    My daughters uncle (deacon) is performing her sacrament of marriage. It will not be a full mass but a communion service as a deacon can not bless the body and blood. So that part of the mass is omitted.  The priest will need to make sure there is enough blessed host for this purpose before the wedding. 
    Report Reply
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    Our priest must be fast  Our mass was about 45 minutes.
    Report Reply
  • mcda04mcda04 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    Our ceremony was really long but i loved it. Our went for 1 Hr and 45 Min.
    Report Reply
  • GoodLuckBear14GoodLuckBear14 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_how-long-was-your-catholic-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:f924705b-ea06-4b67-8c74-4bf885ecaf00Post:f79ce364-07d8-417b-995d-a925075ca1fb">Re: How long was your catholic wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Our ceremony was really long but i loved it. Our went for 1 Hr and 45 Min.
    Posted by mcda04[/QUOTE]

    Holy crap.  Your wedding ceremony was nearly 2 hours long??!?!?  Why?
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
    Report Reply
  • mcda04mcda04 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_how-long-was-your-catholic-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:f924705b-ea06-4b67-8c74-4bf885ecaf00Post:24105516-f41f-44d7-b161-49f0ab29eafb">Re: How long was your catholic wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: How long was your catholic wedding? : Holy crap.  Your wedding ceremony was nearly 2 hours long??!?!?  Why?
    Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]
    Yeah that's what i said when i walked out and looked at the time.

    The priest that was supposed to marry us was not available so the church brought in a different one. I think his sermon was just waay longer plus he was older and talked slower. :) It really didn't seem THAT long though. Our mass was supposed to start at 12:30 and we started at like 1 because he did the same thing in the ceremony before ours.

    I really like it though, he took his time and didn't rush anybody, he even came out and talked to me and my girls before the ceremony to give his personal blessing before mass. i thought it was a sweet touch.
    Report Reply
  • mcda04mcda04 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    oh yeah, we also had a lot of guests attend mass and most took communion.
    Report Reply
  • StephJean83StephJean83 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    I was at a Catholic Mass that was almost 3 hours long. For whatever reasons, the bride had them do 4 readings plus 2 Gospel readings (2 readings and 1 Gospel for the "weekend readings" and 2 readings and 1 Gospel geared as more "wedding") and the church they married in has statues for all 12 apostles(Holy Apostles is the name of the church) and they put flowers and prayed in front of each apostle as well as The Blessed Mother and the Holy Family. Most guests attending were Catholic, so almost everyone partook in Communion. I thought it was odd getting an invite for a 2 pm wedding and the reception/cocktail hour wasn't going to start til 6 pm until I realized we weren't leaving the Church til after 5pm.

    However most are about 1 hr to 1 hr 15 mins depending on how guests and how many partake in Communion, how long the priest talks, and songs selected and if you do the full mass vs wedding ceremony only.
    You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back. - Barbara DeAngelis
    Report Reply
  • bibliophile2010bibliophile2010 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper Combo Breaker First Comment
    Our mass was about 1hr 10min. Without the mass, I would estimate 30-45 minutes depending, as others have said, on how long readings/music/homily last.

    You (plural) should do what matters to you for your ceremony. Don't make it long for the sake of it being long. Don't skip for the sake of making it short. Make sure your guests know (by word of mouth or including it on the invite or your website or whatever) that there will be a full mass, so it is on them to be prepared to participate, sit quietly or not attend (or fast and prepare to receive Holy Communion if they are Catholic).
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Report Reply
  • heroeswearbrownheroeswearbrown member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_how-long-was-your-catholic-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:f924705b-ea06-4b67-8c74-4bf885ecaf00Post:7c4fdf3b-e07f-40d5-81ab-2784a24348ea">Re: How long was your catholic wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I was at a Catholic Mass that was almost 3 hours long. For whatever reasons, the bride had them do 4 readings plus 2 Gospel readings (2 readings and 1 Gospel for the "weekend readings" and 2 readings and 1 Gospel geared as more "wedding") and the church they married in has statues for all 12 apostles(Holy Apostles is the name of the church) and they put flowers and prayed in front of each apostle as well as The Blessed Mother and the Holy Family. Most guests attending were Catholic, so almost everyone partook in Communion. I thought it was odd getting an invite for a 2 pm wedding and the reception/cocktail hour wasn't going to start til 6 pm until I realized we weren't leaving the Church til after 5pm. However most are about 1 hr to 1 hr 15 mins depending on how guests and how many partake in Communion, how long the priest talks, and songs selected and if you do the full mass vs wedding ceremony only.
    Posted by StephJean83[/QUOTE]


    Only reason I can think of for doing 6 readings would be because the couple wanted to allow their wedding to "count" for sunday mass as well. I went to a wedding a few months ago where the couple purposefully asked for the sunday readings to be used instead of choosing their own to make sure that it fulfilled their sunday obligation. Made me giggle a bit, because it was so them to make that request.
    image
    Report Reply
  • julibug86julibug86
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_how-long-was-your-catholic-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:f924705b-ea06-4b67-8c74-4bf885ecaf00Post:d7a4d5d5-5f1e-44a2-944d-3fd3bb9e4aff">Re: How long was your catholic wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: How long was your catholic wedding? : Only reason I can think of for doing 6 readings would be because the couple wanted to allow their wedding to "count" for sunday mass as well. I went to a wedding a few months ago where the couple purposefully asked for the sunday readings to be used instead of choosing their own to make sure that it fulfilled their sunday obligation. Made me giggle a bit, because it was so them to make that request.
    Posted by heroeswearbrown[/QUOTE]

    Ditto!  We are having a 3 pm mass and have been told it will be about an hour (confession is at 4, so I'm thinking they'll try to get us out of there on time).  I've known my priest most of my life and I've seen him hurry through mass when the Patriots were playing on many Sundays (don't mess with Boston sports...).  We are also asking for the Sunday readings so that mass will "count".  I have multiple family members that may choose to end the night early if they have to go to church the next morning; I'd rather have no control over the readings and let my guests enjoy themselve that night! 
    White Knot Wedding Countdown Ticker 168 invited image | 61 are coming image | 10 can't make it image | 97 still need to reply! image
    RSVP Deadline: March 9th
    Report Reply
  • aro1589aro1589 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    we didn't have mass.  ours was about 40 mins
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    Report Reply
  • QkellygirlQkellygirl
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_how-long-was-your-catholic-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:f924705b-ea06-4b67-8c74-4bf885ecaf00Post:8f955d3a-9463-4682-b2b7-a8df5cca2435">How long was your catholic wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Our wedding seems to be about an hour but we would prefer is 30 minutes. My fiancee doesn't want mass now for the reason that it is so long but my mom (who isn't even catholic) thinks its rude because most guests are catholic. Has anyone had a similar problem? How do you shorten it? Thanks!
    Posted by vwhelan85[/QUOTE]

    Seriously...why is he in such a rush? Is there a football game on that day? The ceremony is the most important part. It's about a lifelong commitment you're making to each other.The reception is just an afterthought (or should be) If I were you I'd be insulted by hsi request and ask if he's just in a hurry to get to the open bar.
     
    Do what you want, its your day but I'd be a little concerned about his commitment to your relationship.
    Report Reply
  • HeatherSP13HeatherSP13 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    Our priest said our ceremony should be about 30 minutes.  Our wedding will be about 2.5 months.  Ours is in Catholic Church but without Mass.  It was most apprioprate situation for us.  I am a practicing Catholic but my fiance is not.  He is agnostic/spritual with family background of Catholic & Baptist.    
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards