Does it look like me?

RachNRich · January 2010

Introducing the Rach n Rich cake topper!

lovebug30012 · January 2010

Cute!!

AmoroAgain · January 2010

I think, in order to make it more realistic, you should have him holding purse strings.

Nebb · January 2010

I think its adorable!

ThePinkSuperhero · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:f9fbd666-281b-4ce1-926e-99a5ca7c55fd">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think, in order to make it more realistic, you should have him holding purse strings.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

Oh snap!

WildRumpus · January 2010

Very cute! Where'd you get it?

RachNRich · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:f9fbd666-281b-4ce1-926e-99a5ca7c55fd">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think, in order to make it more realistic, you should have him holding purse strings.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

I'd laugh---if I thought it was a laughable matter.

But, per the advice I received the other night--we were able to talk it over, money is no longer an issue, and we have equal access. I suppose all I had to do all along was explain my money insecurities.

SarahPLiz · January 2010

I think its cute, but it kind of looks like you are both naked, except his shirt and tie and your lacy overlay. Was that intended?

ThePinkSuperhero · January 2010

They're very cute. Our topper is similar.

beatlesgirl25 · January 2010

Cute! You should have little satiny paints in yellow and pink, just in case your hair color changes again before the wedding.

RachNRich · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:0156a7a2-f42c-477b-a4cd-1f16d65264b4">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think its cute, but it kind of looks like you are both naked, except his shirt and tie and your lacy overlay. Was that intended?
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

Well, he's wearing a khaki suit--and my dress is coffee colored with a white lace overlay....so I suppose it's intended, but we do look kinda nakey. And I'm okay with that!

SarahPLiz · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:382e7b43-eacc-4112-8d14-69bca4a6badd">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Does it look like me? : Well, he's wearing a khaki suit--and my dress is coffee colored with a white lace overlay....so I suppose it's intended, but we do look kinda nakey. And I'm okay with that!
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE]

Cool! It really is cute!

AmoroAgain · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:7e38bd84-76a5-4e43-9abb-4904f3778b84">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Does it look like me? : I'd laugh---if I thought it was a laughable matter. But, per the advice I received the other night--we were able to talk it over, money is no longer an issue, and we have equal access. I suppose all I had to do all along was explain my money insecurities.
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE]

I'm very glad you were able to provide a sitcom-like fix to your issue in a matter of minutes.

thesuninherhead · January 2010

That is super cute (just like you! :P)

thesuninherhead · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:7e38bd84-76a5-4e43-9abb-4904f3778b84">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Does it look like me? : I'd laugh---if I thought it was a laughable matter. But, per the advice I received the other night--we were able to talk it over, money is no longer an issue, and we have equal access. I suppose all I had to do all along was explain my money insecurities.
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE] I hate to be a hater, but I daresay that you will have more discussions to go on this, Rach. Unless you're the most amazing couple ever, things like this tend to take more negotiation than one conversation to resolve- particularly when some of the issues stem from learnings you've both had over the course of your lives. I'm sure you know this, though.

AmoroAgain · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:7793db2d-2698-4339-8ab7-7a6bb920f198">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Does it look like me? : I hate to be a hater, but I daresay that you will have more discussions to go on this, Rach. Unless you're the most amazing couple ever, things like this tend to take more negotiation than one conversation to resolve- particularly when some of the issues stem from learnings you've both had over the course of your lives. I'm sure you know this, though.
Posted by thesuninherhead[/QUOTE]

Sometimes, I want to carry you around in your pocket Sun. :)

thesuninherhead · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:27487e25-a1cf-4abe-bc28-e829c89404df">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Does it look like me? : Sometimes, I want to carry you around in your pocket Sun. :)
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE] If this means that I get to hang out in the snow in Italy with you, I'm in! Where do I sign up?

AmoroAgain · January 2010

I'm glad you realized that when I said "your" I meant "my" pocket. Geez.

OH, come on over whenever you want!

thesuninherhead · January 2010

Oh haha I didn't even pick up on that. I egotistically presumed that you meant your pocket! ;p

RachNRich · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:7793db2d-2698-4339-8ab7-7a6bb920f198">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Does it look like me? : I hate to be a hater, but I daresay that you will have more discussions to go on this, Rach. Unless you're the most amazing couple ever, things like this tend to take more negotiation than one conversation to resolve- particularly when some of the issues stem from learnings you've both had over the course of your lives. I'm sure you know this, though.
Posted by thesuninherhead[/QUOTE]

And, Sun, I hate to be a hater as well, but I daresay that neither you (nor Amoro, for that matter) have a cursory understanding of my relationship outside of the bits and pieces I've written about here.

thesuninherhead · January 2010

I may not know your relationship, but I do know that issues of differences in money management which have been learnt during a couple's upbringing take energy to overcome which usually extends far beyond one conversation.

I have nothing at all against Rich and I want to make that clear, but I do think that if you guys have honestly turned this whole thing around in just one conversation it's rather remarkable, and given what I know about relationships and people on a whole, I find it hard to believe... If all you needed was a discussion, well, that is fantastic- but I think at this stage if I were in your position, given what you've stated about the situation, I would be hesitantly optimistic rather than defensively certain.

That said, I'm not in your position, and you are. If it was truly that simple and all is completely resolved now, that is great for you guys... and I would hope that given what you'd said about the situation, you could understand why others here who care about your wellbeing may not share your certainty.

AmoroAgain · January 2010

The day I stop hearing "You don't know us or our relationship" as a reason as to why we can't place an opinion on something so OBVIOUSLY red-flag is the day I become a bajillionaire.

Once again, a fifteen minute discussion will not provide you with a lasting solution. I hope it all works out, but it would frankly surprise no one to hear that you're having this same issue in a few months from now.

RachNRich · January 2010

Fortunately, the money discussion was that easy. I will never understand what it was like for him growing up with money--just like he will never understand what it was like for me growing up without it. It came down to setting up a joint account--and that being that.

The other discussions? Well, those aren't so easy...and will take time and work.

I just don't see what the point in poking fun at the situation is.

AmoroAgain · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:f5ea84d1-39d5-42dc-b2ed-db8176ea9d36">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE] I just don't see what the point in poking fun at the situation is.
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE]

I get that it's not funny because it's you I was joking about, but it's definitely funny to others. You would laugh if I'd said that about someone else.

thesuninherhead · January 2010

I presume the final sentence isn't directed to me, because I would hope it was clear that I wasn't poking fun. I just found your response to Amoro somewhat unsettling, that''s all.

RachNRich · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:16f7b6c6-02f9-4cb7-b35c-90193a383249">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]The day I stop hearing "You don't know us or our relationship" as a reason as to why we can't place an opinion on something so OBVIOUSLY red-flag is the day I become a bajillionaire. Once again, a fifteen minute discussion will not provide you with a lasting solution. I hope it all works out, but it would frankly surprise no one to hear that you're having this same issue in a few months from now.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

But perhaps the day you do realize that not knowing a relationship in its entirety means, while your opinion is your opinion, you still do not know it all.

I'm not one to stand in the way of your opinion--you can think what you want. That being said, I just don't find it necessary to make a joke out of my situation.

While a 15 minute conversation will not fix my world, it provided a solution to the specific topic at hand. May we need a different solution in the future? Sure. We'll cross the bridge when we get there.

AmoroAgain · January 2010

No Sun, I'm the one making fun of her.

Anyway, I think you should take your panties out of a knot and calm down Rach. It was a little poke, it wasn't that bad, but you sound overly defensive and outraged because of one comment.

RachNRich · January 2010

Amoro, it isn't because of one comment. It has a lot to do with the comments I got the other night---the whole "red-flag-run-don't-look-back" crap.

I understand that in asking for advice, I'm going to get the typical idiotic responses. But, I'm not some newb on here---and the "run and don't look back" comments aren't helpful. Nor is continual jokes about it.

Pardon my panties being in a knot; I am defensive. I'm also on a lot of pain medication, and my defensiveness is in rare form.

AmoroAgain · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:3ca368c7-2cce-4bbd-bf36-0227fda27ee4">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]Amoro, it isn't because of one comment. It has a lot to do with the comments I got the other night---the whole "red-flag-run-don't-look-back" crap. I understand that in asking for advice, I'm going to get the typical idiotic responses. But, I'm not some newb on here---and the "run and don't look back" comments aren't helpful. Nor is continual jokes about it. Pardon my panties being in a knot; I am defensive. I'm also on a lot of pain medication, and my defensiveness is in rare form.
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE]

I didn't know that pain medication made you more defensive! I rather thought it had the opposite effect of making you quite laid back. Huh.

You're going to get people who think it's horrible and scary when you post something like you did. You can choose to listen or choose to tell them to STFU. You can ignore it too. People think Tide's H is a douche too, but she just doesn't talk about it anymore. She ignored people because (as you've pointed out) she knows the relationship and we don't. So, if you believe it's going to be fine, then great. You should probably follow the same path.

RachNRich · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_look-like?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:84daf2ca-e379-43ab-bca6-9b43b7cc3044Post:bda4e6f1-b234-467e-ab12-29dd28790b6a">Re: Does it look like me?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Does it look like me? : I didn't know that pain medication made you more defensive! I rather thought it had the opposite effect of making you quite laid back. Huh. You're going to get people who think it's horrible and scary when you post something like you did. You can choose to listen or choose to tell them to STFU. You can ignore it too. People think Tide's H is a douche too, but she just doesn't talk about it anymore. She ignored people because (as you've pointed out) she knows the relationship and we don't. So, if you believe it's going to be fine, then great. You should probably follow the same path.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

I suppose different people react differently. Go figure.

ricksang · January 2010

I don't think anyone gave idiotic advice. You said that Rich did not want you to get the surgery because of the scar it would leave. What are posters supposed to think by this statement? We can't read minds and we can't assume he means anything differently by that statement if it is the only thing you give us to go by. You also said Rich wouldn't let you handle any of the wedding money from his parents and that you pay most of the bills. Again, we can only go on what you give us.

If Ricky told me he did not want me to get a surgery (that may catch cancer early) because he did not wantto see a scar, I'd SERIOUSLY question our relationship. If he had all the control over the money and did not want to relinquish some of that control, I just might run the other way. I think others might too, so you can not call their reponses idiotic and that is quite an insulting thing to say. People care and they don't want to see you hurt! I know I feel this way.

I am glad you two are working things out but I think your battles with this man are not over.

Does it look like me?

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