I just recently got engaged (just over a week ago) and have come up with several ideas of what I want and when and where I want it. Well, I met with my mom for dinner last weekend for the first time since the engagement (which she was not particularly ecstatic about, but what can you do?) and her ideas immediately started butting heads with mine on just about every key point. I'm learning compromise, but one thing that is really bothering me is her thoughts on the timing.
Originally my fiance and I had talked (even before the engagement) about sometime during Fall 2011. Well, mom only wants a "spring" wedding (she's talking May or June, which I'm from Alabama and that, to me, is SUMMER), and she knows full well that there is no way that we can get married this spring since I will be working full-time over 2 hours away from my fiance through April while graduating in December.
The other side of this is that my fiance will not finish his teaching certificate until December of 2011. He has his bachelors and works 2 jobs and does well for himself right now, but for some reason, everyone is so stuck on this "finish school first" thing, even though we would be able to support ourselves wherever it is we end up. I'm in my late 20's and he's in his early 30's and we're ready for the commitment. Regardless of when we plan the marriage, I will definitely be moving in with him after I'm finished with my degree and this job. So my argument is, "we may as well go ahead and tie the knot since we're only planning on doing the same thing while he's finishing school anyways." How do I explain that to my mom? How do I put my foot down when she thinks he HAS to finish school when, like I said, he's already got his degree? Do I bargain with her with other key points about the wedding (ex: I'll only get married in my hometown if....)? Am I just caring too much what people (specifically my mom) think?