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Moms and Maids

Oh, mom (part 2)

Is it traditional for the bride's parents to dance together if they are divorced?

My mom and dad get along fine, even though they've been seperated since I was young. Recently, some shiz has gone down between my mom's side of the family and my dad's side, even though my mom and dad still get along just fine. My mother is now telling me that she HAS to dance with my father at the wedding because "it's tradition". I honestly think she just wants to step on my dad's girlfriend's toes. I suggested that for the parent dance, she can dance with FMIL's husband and my dad can dance with FMIL, but that wasn't good enough for her. I'm really trying to keep this day as drama-free as possible, and she keeps anticipating what my dad's side of the family is going to do to cause issues. Why on earth can't she see how this could be an issue?

Help. :(
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Re: Oh, mom (part 2)

  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    This "tradition" is a new one to me.  The only dances with parents that I am familiar with is the mother/son and father/daughter dances.  It used to be that the WP would have a dance as well, but that is almost completely gone.  I would keep telling her no on this one.

    My parents did share a spotlight dance at my brother's wedding a few years ago, but it was to honor their 40th anniversary.  It was a surprise to them and the dj played my parents wedding song for them to dance to.
  • edited February 2012
    The only time I ever saw a spotlight parent dance at a wedding was when the wedding was on the bride's parents' anniversary - she surprised them by playing their wedding song and having them dance together.  I've never seen it in any other circumstance, so I think it's a pretty big stretch to call it a "tradition."
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  • Yeah, never heard of this either. Maybe in some circles, where WP dances are common, but meh. I would just tell her you're not doing either of these, and the only dances will be you and your new H, and/or you and your dad, and/or your new H and his mother. 
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  • Try to dodge the bullet, especially since your mom is playing games here.  Ask her point blank how many people really want to sit and watch the parents dance after they already watched the first dance and father/daughter and mother/son dance.  The answer is NO ONE.  Let her know that long drawn out dances are quite boring for the guests and they would like to be up dancing themselves.
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    ditto kmmssg. Clearing the dance party for too many spotlight dances can kill the party. Most of us want to see the bride and groom's first dance. The father/daugher, mother/son dance is nice, too, especially if you combine them. Anything more than that is going to be boring for your guests.
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