Moms and Maids

Ring problem.

I recently bought my fiance's ring. It is a titanium band with a gold inlay. I found it on ebay for 20 bucks.
 My mother is pissed off because I didnt go spend 5-6 hundred bucks on the same band at a jewelry store. Saying I am cheep and she feels bad for my fiance because I didnt buy him a "real" ring.
My fiance is tough on jewelry. I mean really tough. Every gold ring he has save one that I wear around my neck on a chain has had to be cut off his hand. He wanted a titanium band because they are tough. I was the one that insisted it have gold on it.
We went to jewelry stores and found bands we liked that were more expensive than my engagement band, and that puppy was over $1,000 bucks! And we went online and found the same bands for ALOT less.
Am I cheep for buying him exactly what he wants for alot less?
And what do I say to a momzilla of the bride who insists that the ring is fake when it is confirmed real by jewelers and by every test able to check it is real save taking a grinder to it.

Re: Ring problem.

  • tidetraveltidetravel member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Tell her to eff off.  A ring is nothing more than a symbol.  It doesn't matter how much you spent on it or what it is made out of.  If it had ANY relevance at all to the state of your marriage, then every couple that has platinum rings should be happily married, and every marriage that started with a topaz promise ring is doomed to fail. 

    DH and I both have titanium rings because they were what we could afford at the time.  It doesn't make our marriage any less valid because they're not coated in platinum. 
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  • hpeters2004hpeters2004 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I know. My Fiance loves his ring. I mean absolutely loves it. He didn't want to take it off and the way his eyes lit up about made me burst into happy tears. I have my momzilla and now my MoH, my little sister, on my case because I didnt spend an entire month's paycheck on his ring.
  • edited December 2011
    We are both getting titanium rings, mostly because we prefer the styles. It's about what you like, not what it costs. Period. My FI had a hard time adjusting to the idea of getting them on Amazon.com or something instead of at a jeweler, but like I explained to him-- it's just metal. It's the same no matter where you buy it. Stop telling your mom what you pay for stuff and eliminate the problem.
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  • hpeters2004hpeters2004 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I didn't tell her. My dad did. My dad agrees with me on the ring. It litterally looks like a 500 buck ring. And he's like me, its a symbol, and we could get a pair of crackerjack rings for all I care. I love my fiance and i want to spend the rest of my life with him.
    My dad is happy we found something we love at an amazing price. I just wish he hadnt said anything.
  • tidetraveltidetravel member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_ring-problem?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:8b146244-c887-412e-a660-6c6d98d9fa0cPost:1a5b169f-31d7-4dd2-8cb3-68a1fde210c6">Re: Ring problem.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I know. My Fiance loves his ring. I mean absolutely loves it. He didn't want to take it off and the way his eyes lit up about made me burst into happy tears. I have my momzilla and now my MoH, my little sister, on my case because I didnt spend an entire month's paycheck on his ring.
    Posted by hpeters2004[/QUOTE]

    Just tell them that you're going to use the money that you saved on his ring to buy new sex toys for the honeymoon.  That should shut them up. 
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  • edited December 2011
    You got him what he wanted - that is what is important.
  • lauraf1202lauraf1202 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No ring problem at all!  Good for you for getting an awesome price on something your FI loves. :)

    Tell your mom to get a life... why does she care how much you spent anyways?! 
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  • edited December 2011
    Tell your mom to butt out.  She is not wearing it, its not her issue.

    What does your FI think? Its his ring, his is the opinion that matters.
  • edited December 2011
    Tell your mom he's happy with his ring, and that she should be glad you're being fiscally responsible and acting like an adult when it comes to your spending habits. ;)
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  • ekilzer1ekilzer1 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_ring-problem?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:8b146244-c887-412e-a660-6c6d98d9fa0cPost:905eb4f2-f21e-44df-99bf-82fa4d10e750">Re: Ring problem.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Ring problem. : Just tell them that you're going to use the money that you saved on his ring to buy new sex toys for the honeymoon.  That should shut them up. 
    Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>HAHAHA I love it. </div><div>
    </div><div>It's none of her business, and just like everyone else said it's just a symbol, who cares how much it costs!!!! We are buying my FI's ring off of Overstock for $50! The exact same ring retails for over $500 at our jeweler!!!! </div><div>
    </div><div>I have people all up in my business about my wedding band too. My ring is a very very unique shape (a mix between a halo & wrap setting) and didn't come in a set, so my band had to be custom made- so rather than getting it all jeweled out in diamonds, I am getting just a plain white gold band (fitted to the design of the ring) because the whole "custom" part is expensive enough as is!!!! I hardly get to wear my ring anyways since I am an athlete- I am buying a titanium band off of Overstock for myself so that I can still wear it when I play (I feel super bare without my engagement ring on!) </div>
  • edited December 2011
    I think if it's something that he loves (and you love the way he loves it!) what does it matter what it cost? It's nothing to do with your Mum and DEFINITELY don't feel bad about it.

    We went with titanium for my FH's ring because that's what he wanted. I think it's becoming a much more popular choice nowadays.

    I definitely think you should go with the "sex toys for the honeymoon" retort!! That would be really funny :)
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  • AutumnFairAutumnFair member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Seriously you should be proud that you searched and found a great deal. I'm definitely a bargain shopper and if people want to pay full price on something they can do as the please but I'm just not like that. I love the adventure of looking for a good deal, if people have a problem well, too bad, their probably just jealous that they can't find the good deals.

    Yeah, tell your mom that with the savings on the ring you can use that money for something more important and tell her to stop hating on your awesome bargaining skills. 
  • graysquirrelgraysquirrel member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It doesn't matter how much a ring cost or what it is made out of as long as the person likes it and it was given with love. I have a non-traditional ring and I don't think that my FI loves me any less for giving me what I asked for and saving money while doing it. People need to stop believing the lies that the industry shoves down our throats. Good for you for doing something different. 
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  • asialee2asialee2 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Don't worry about your mom. You got your man the ring he wanted at a great price- weddings are expensive as is so if you can save some cash on his band then all the power to you! 
    If she wants you to spend more money on it let her know she can give you the $ and you will buy it at a price that suits her. It will shut her up! :) 
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  • KnibletKniblet member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think you already figured out that what HE wants to wear on HIS finger for the rest of his life is more important than what your mom wants.  She needs to back off.  Neither of your rings are her business.

    Good for you for thinking about making your future husband happy and not your mom.


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  • courtney1188courtney1188 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think it's anyone else's business how much you spent on your FI's ring or how much he spent on yours. If anyone asked I would just say that you bought your FI the ring of his choosing, and you are both quite happy with it. And if they continue to be rude I would flat out tell them you don't feel comfortable discussing that sort of thing. If the rudeness still continues, then I would probably get rude back and tell them it's not any of their business.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_ring-problem?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:8b146244-c887-412e-a660-6c6d98d9fa0cPost:68c07e97-2074-4a2b-8b05-aa28aaeb2928">Re: Ring problem.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think you already figured out that what HE wants to wear on HIS finger for the rest of his life is more important than what your mom wants. 
    Posted by Kniblet[/QUOTE]

    His feelings don't even need to be THAT strong. Plenty of people choose rings they would simply be happy to wear until they feel they money spend on an upgrade, that doesn't sound like the situation here, but however he feels about it, it's none of her mom's buisness.
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