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Reception before actually getting married????

De VelasquezDe Velasquez member
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in Not Engaged Yet
Hello!

Some of the girls here know that I am Dominican and my boyfriend is from Honduras, we both live in Dominican Republic and we are planning to get married on 2013, but there is a problem...

His visa is expiring in August this year, he's dealing with his documents to have citizenship here, but the process seems to be very slow, expensive and with no warranty that he will actually get the citizenship (that's how everything works here), so he will keep on trying, but if he doesn't success on it, he will stay here with his visa expired, as is not a big deal in my country to be around there with your visa expired, it's risky just for Haitians, but not for other nationalities.

Then, if he solves the problem with his visa, there's no problem, we will get married here and live here, but if he stays here with his visa expired, then we can't get married here and should get married in Honduras, so, if that happens, I'd like to know if we can have a small reception here before traveling (so, that would be couple days before getting married), is that possible?  Or should I just discard the option of having a reception here?

Note: There are many reasons why we can't get married this year.  And I think my parents would be able to go with us to Honduras for the occassion.
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Re: Reception before actually getting married????

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    bethsmilesbethsmiles member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Why can't you do the reception after? I know a lot of people who have done that. 


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    Wrkn925Wrkn925 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Who's on first?
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    Wrkn925Wrkn925 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh, I remember you.  You're a little sweetheart that speaks like 3 languages, huh?

    Did you ever get the ring you picked out?

    I have no experience with Visas besides swiping my credit card.  I wish you much luck, though!
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    LizzyTish88LizzyTish88 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:dd691aec-f280-475c-a797-508c2740d034">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]Who's on first?
    Posted by Wrkn925[/QUOTE]

    So what's on third?
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    heyimbrenheyimbren member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:ced269ee-63c8-4f6b-b9af-f6e153bf62c6">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why can't you do the reception after? I know a lot of people who have done that. 
    Posted by bethsmiles[/QUOTE]

    If this doesn't work out, would someone host a going away or engagement party for you or something like that before the wedding? Because it technically wouldn't be an actual wedding reception since there wouldn't be a wedding.
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    NurseyKNurseyK
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Like Bren said, I think if you aren't married then having an engagement party or a going away party would be more appropriate. If you have to leave and marry in Honduras, would you be returning any time in your first year as newlyweds? You could have your reception then. I think people would understand and still come to celebrate.
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    peekaboo2011peekaboo2011 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:f3468de2-a386-4b08-8f05-f37db2d4f379">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : So what's on third?
    Posted by cdechristopher[/QUOTE]

    <div>I am beyond confused.</div>
    I french with my man
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    Wrkn925Wrkn925 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:f3468de2-a386-4b08-8f05-f37db2d4f379">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : So what's on third?
    Posted by cdechristopher[/QUOTE]

    No, what's on second.
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    Wrkn925Wrkn925 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:1ac7b343-1eea-40d9-9e4f-f72a5b68622a">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : I am beyond confused.
    Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

    <a href="http://www.baseball-almanac.com/humor4.shtml">http://www.baseball-almanac.com/humor4.shtml</a>
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    SeaTea02SeaTea02
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:f3468de2-a386-4b08-8f05-f37db2d4f379">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : So what's on third?
    Posted by cdechristopher[/QUOTE]

    <div>"Who" is on first, "What" is on second, and "I Don't Know" is on 3rd. </div><div>
    </div><div>Where the heck did you get "so what"? </div>

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    NurseyKNurseyK
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    So who's on third? :)
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    SeaTea02SeaTea02
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh yeah, OP's question...

    I would do it after the wedding. I think a lot of times wedding receptions after the wedding are tacky, but in your case I think it is acceptable if it is done really close to getting married.

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    Wrkn925Wrkn925 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:58d316c0-1034-4e1b-bdf1-ea8cab97a6ac">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]So who's on third? :)
    Posted by NurseyK[/QUOTE]

    No, Who's on first.
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    LizzyTish88LizzyTish88 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:58d316c0-1034-4e1b-bdf1-ea8cab97a6ac">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]So who's on third? :)
    Posted by NurseyK[/QUOTE]

    No, Who** is on first, I don't know is on third.


    Sea- I thought he said "So what's on third? Then the guys yells "No what's on second!" I think I missed the question mark lol.

    **ETA- I had a Dyslexic moment.
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    Wrkn925Wrkn925 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:7f08b715-b0ec-48ef-bfb6-db8d7b3e234b">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : "Who" is on first, "What" is on second, and <strong>"I Don't Know" is on 3rd.</strong>  Where the heck did you get "so what"? 
    Posted by SeaTea02[/QUOTE]

    No. He's on third. 

    I could do this all day.

    Do an engagement party or going away party as PP said.  Have a reception after the wedding.
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    SeaTea02SeaTea02
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:26b3b485-b373-4b55-99a8-ca1623cafdc8">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : No, How is on first, I don't know is on third. Sea- I thought he said "So what's on third? Then the guys yells "No what's on second!" I think I missed the question mark lol.
    Posted by cdechristopher[/QUOTE]

    <div>I remember that now. I wasn't sure what they were teaching you Red Sox fans for a minute ;-)</div>

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    LizzyTish88LizzyTish88 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:4b7686b9-ad80-4d52-ac6f-6db15ecf8775">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : I remember that now. I wasn't sure what they were teaching you Red Sox fans for a minute ;-)
    Posted by SeaTea02[/QUOTE]

    What is with the Sox hate? I actually learned it in middle school. The high school has a production they do every year called "That's E(ntertainment)" and it cracked me up!
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    oceana919oceana919
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    This thread makes my head hurt.

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    SeaTea02SeaTea02
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:457e8552-7b07-40cc-94f8-eaa9c0151011">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Reception before actually getting married???? : What is with the Sox hate? I actually learned it in middle school. The high school has a production they do every year called "That's E(ntertainment)" and it cracked me up!
    Posted by cdechristopher[/QUOTE]

    <div>I'm a Yankees fan, that is with the Sox hate. In all honesty though I haven't followed baseball closely since high school. </div><div>
    </div><div>I learned it in middle school too! It was in drama class though. </div>

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    Sparrow87Sparrow87
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with the other girls, just having a party seems like your best choice, isn't that what a reception is anyway? 
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    heyimbrenheyimbren member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:a4f5c328-f507-4460-80be-3c802855ce9d">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree with the other girls, just having a party seems like your best choice, isn't that what a reception is anyway? 
    Posted by Sparrow87[/QUOTE]

    A wedding reception is a party hosted by the couple to thank the guests for being a party of their wedding day.
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    Elle1036Elle1036 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I learned the entire Who's on First skit with a friend once.  I was Abbott.  We were awesome.
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    De VelasquezDe Velasquez member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hey, girls, thank you for your ideas. 

    That's what we should do, a kind of farewell party and few months later, the wedding reception, but I don't want it to be like a vows renewal, I want an actual reception. Well, I still have PLENTY of time to think about it.  lol. 

    Wrkn, I haven't get my ring yet, but it is on its way... Meanwhile, I was watching rings on Walmart's website, I know we could not have enough funds to buy the ring I told you, so I got crazy about those rings in walmart that we can get in a very low price until we get the definitive ring and still they are in real gold and diamond and look like formal engagement rings, also I am size 5, so, a small diamond looks BIG in my hand, lol.  Then, we are ordering this one:






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    heyimbrenheyimbren member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:b73c51c3-07c2-43e6-9644-ebdcde95dd76">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hey, girls, thank you for your ideas.  That's what we should do, a kind of farewell party and few months later, the wedding reception, but I don't want it to be like a vows renewal, I want an actual reception. Well, I still have PLENTY of time to think about it.  lol. 
    Posted by De Velasquez[/QUOTE]

    A vow renewal is similar to a ceremony, as opposed to the wedding reception. You can have an actual reception, but that should be after the wedding for the wedding guests. You can do an at home reception later, but I don't think you can have a wedding reception...without a wedding.
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    SassyFlatsSassyFlats member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Bren, I understand what you're saying, but I think you're getting too complicated with the semantics there.

    Have an engagement or going-away party before you leave. Have a reception for your friends and family when you get home.

    Usually, it's more appropriate for someone else to throw the engagement or going-away party, so you may want to think about that. The wording for the reception invitations can be worked out later so that they say something about "celebrating your recent marriage" instead of sounding as if there is a wedding to attend as well.
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    heyimbrenheyimbren member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    Ahh, I see what you're saying Sassy. I misunderstand your last reply, OP.
    FTR, I agree with what you suggested, Sassy. She wants an at home reception after the wedding, instead of a vow renewal, right?

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    SassyFlatsSassyFlats member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That's what I'm understanding.
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    De VelasquezDe Velasquez member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_reception-before-actually-getting-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2dddfa1c-ca48-4519-893f-d7168c1f6e05Post:7ca84f79-1a0a-4bc2-9514-fba77fd2ea19">Re: Reception before actually getting married????</a>:
    [QUOTE]Bren, I understand what you're saying, but I think you're getting too complicated with the semantics there. Have an engagement or going-away party before you leave. Have a reception for your friends and family when you get home. Usually, it's more appropriate for someone else to throw the engagement or going-away party, so you may want to think about that. The wording for the reception invitations can be worked out later so that they say something about "celebrating your recent marriage" instead of sounding as if there is a wedding to attend as well.
    Posted by SassyFlats[/QUOTE]

    <div>Good point... I wasn't thinking how would the wording be in this case.</div><div>
    </div><div>What I meant is that if we can, I'd like to have everything that first time brides have, even our reception is late, that's why I mentioned the vow renewal.</div><div>
    </div><div>My boyfriend has a cousin living in the DR, but in a city far from ours, well, she offered her big and beautiful house for our wedding and I think it would be perfect, as we want an intimate party, so we could rent a bus for the guests, it would be fun, a kind of "destinantion" wedding, also, if we get to marry here, her house is near the temple (where we want our religious ceremony to be), so it would be just perfect!</div><div>
    </div><div>
    </div>
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