Groomsmen acting up XP

nicknuttnc · January 2012

I had bridal get together right before Christmas and my BM acted ok. But my groomsmen where the main one complaining about everything. I have never in my life seen a bunch of babies in my life. Ok first they complained about the price of the tuxs (which they picked out with my FI). I did fixt it and found some more 30 dollars cheaper. Now we are going to battle about these stupid shoes. My FI wants to wear white Air ones (this is my FI favorite shoes), My FI best people wants to wear different shoes (one wants to wear white crocs, and the other want to wear timberlands). One of the BM I think is doing this becasue they want to get my goat. Everyone knows I hate crocs and madden shoes. I hate when my FI wears them and make sure we always walk really fast past that store in the outlet.... I am making a big deal about it and My FI is like let them wear what they want. I think they can wear the white air one for the wedding and pictures and then change into anything they want for the reception. I said they are not paying all this money for pictures, for me to see something I do not like on there feet (especially those ugly crocs, I hate with a passion).

What do you think am I making a too big a deal about it or should I stay my ground????

This is the suit..
Stephen Geoffrey Alfresco

mcmeghan311 · January 2012

Nope, it's your day and they are your pictures. If they agreed to be in the bridal party, they kind of agreed to wear what you want. The only way I can see it is if they're having to all buy a new pair of shoes for this, because airforce ones are expensive. However, if one was willing to buy new Tims, he can afford either one. I guess it all comes down to the money. It's a lot to ask people to pay to rent the tux and then tell them to buy an additional pair of shoes that they won't ever wear again. Is there a compromise, like maybe a pair of sandals like the guy in the photo? Those would be cheaper.

Sorry you're having a rough time, that sucks. Ask FI to figure it out with them, but they are acting pretty childish, IMO. Crocs for a wedding? Um...are you performing surgery? Why do you need crocs? lol About the only time I can tolerate crocs is at work (hospital) when you're supposed to look stupid but be comfortable.

Good luck :0)

BMcLeodTeam · January 2012

Etiquette wise, guys fall under the same rules as the women do. When they agreed to be in your wedding, they agreed to the suit/tux as long as it is within their discussed budget. They agreed to wear shoes that fit the 'rules' but if those rules are too specific then its on you.

For example, you can say to guys I want you to wear white casual shoes, or black dress shoes, but if you're going to say anything more specific, like specify a type of black dress shoe, you need to be buying them.

Its the same with bridesmaids. If you say "I would like you to all wear nude coloured pumps" you're fine (this rule does not apply if its some totally out their colour like neon green lol) but if you say I need you to buy these nude pumps from this store at this price, you need to be paying for them.

Accessories that add to the cost of the day is not necessarily part and parcel of being in the wedding party. Brides who feel it needs to be x exact shoe need to make sure its in their budget to pay for them all. Remember these are your and FI's friends... what is more important after the wedding, that they buy the exact shoe you invision in your photos (btw no one else will notice what shoes they are wearing) so that your photos have matching shoes in 20 years, or when you look back at this photos will the most important thing be that your closest family/friends are there with you?

nicknuttnc · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_groomsmen-acting-up-xp?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:69d6f87d-6d9f-407a-bb0f-90f7f89f10c4Post:d6941d09-29cd-4f2b-ab77-60de7b38cda3">Re: Groomsmen acting up XP</a>:
[QUOTE]Etiquette wise, guys fall under the same rules as the women do. When they agreed to be in your wedding, they agreed to the suit/tux as long as it is within their discussed budget. They agreed to wear shoes that fit the 'rules' but if those rules are too specific then its on you. For example, you can say to guys I want you to wear white casual shoes, or black dress shoes, but if you're going to say anything more specific, like specify a type of black dress shoe, you need to be buying them. Its the same with bridesmaids. If you say "I would like you to all wear nude coloured pumps" you're fine (this rule does not apply if its some totally out their colour like neon green lol) but if you say I need you to buy these nude pumps from this store at this price, you need to be paying for them. Accessories that add to the cost of the day is not necessarily part and parcel of being in the wedding party. Brides who feel it needs to be x exact shoe need to make sure its in their budget to pay for them all. Remember these are your and FI's friends... what is more important after the wedding, that they buy the exact shoe you invision in your photos (btw no one else will notice what shoes they are wearing) so that your photos have matching shoes in 20 years, or when you look back at this photos will the most important thing be that your closest family/friends are there with you?
Posted by BMcLeodTeam[/QUOTE]

This was discussed in prior meetings with the GM because we have alot of GM that do not want to rent shoes (they did not like the whole thing about other people wearing them first). I picked a shoe they all wear. They all have Air 1s in the closet. So my question is if everyone agreed to not renting the shoes and
I said I wanted white A ( they can by dunks or A 1s at whatever store they want) do we still suppose to pay for them?

BMcLeodTeam · January 2012

If you specify that's what they have to be then yes, if you just say white runners or something generic like that then no.

SCogs18 · January 2012

It's absurd that they want to wear crocs to a wedding. Their shoes all need to look similar. If they all already own the shoes then they need to do it and deal. It's not costing them any money I don't see why they have a problem with the shoes.

BMcLeodTeam · January 2012

I agree that it is absurd that they want to wear crocs. Maybe made the guideline that they have to be a white runner... if they already own those, that's likely what they'll wear rather than going out of their way to buy a different pair just to wear

Groomsmen acting up XP

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